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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
January 14, 2012 12:57 PM
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"Self-Compassion and Psychological Well-Being" is a GoodTherapy.org Web Conference presented by Dr. Kristin Neff, available for CE credits to psychologists, therapists, and mental health professionals. What is the key to psychological health? For years it was believed to be self-esteem. However, research psychologists have highlighted several downsides to the endless pursuit of self-esteem, including constant social comparisons, ego-defensiveness, narcissism, and the instability and contingency of self-worth. As suggested by research, self-compassion is a healthier way of relating to oneself. Self-compassion offers all the same benefits as self-esteem, without the same downsides. It requires that people treat themselves with kindness, like they would treat a good friend whom they cared about....
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
January 12, 2012 1:36 PM
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Self compassion is using one’s personality to direct, empower, and foster personal growth with love. As soon as we enter into judgments like “I’m not smart enough,” “I’m too fat or too thin,” “That was a stupid thing to say,” or “I don’t deserve this,” in that moment, we have moved away from self compassion. It is not empowering and it is definitely not based in love. And if this kind of thinking persists without a consistent effort to change it, it can lead to anxiety, sleep difficulties, relationship problems, sickness and even depressive emotional states.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
December 27, 2011 1:46 PM
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Self-compassion – it’s love, care and nonjudgmental self-acceptance. It supports and regenerates our system and is among the purest of human emotions and qualities of the heart. We live in a world in which we teach and ask our children to show compassion to one another, but often we fail to stress the importance of self-compassion. Too often, when it comes to extending compassion to ourselves, the message is that this is somehow selfish, selfcentered, even an extravagance, and should be avoided. Why is this? Denying ourselves this gift when we fail to live up to our own or others’ expectations, become ill or falter in any of a number of other ways, deprives us of the healing power of this generous and loving emotion.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
December 9, 2011 1:45 PM
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Hendriks and her collaborator Michelle M. Wirth measured self compassion, negative affect, and cortisol in study participants who were asked to deliver a persuasive speech to a panel of trained judges. They found that participants who displayed high self-compassion experienced less negative affect than those who displayed low self-compassion. The researchers also found no correlation between cortisol levels and self-compassion. In other words, high self-compassion had no negative impact on the amount of energy that participants were able to devote to the stressful task at hand.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
December 2, 2011 11:21 AM
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A new study suggests how people can heal from the end of their marriage. A new study suggests how people can heal from the end of their marriage. More than two million adults in the United States get divorced each year. For some, the separation is associated with lasting declines in mental health and a greater risk of physical ailments. But others are able to bounce back without suffering these long-term problems. Why do some heal better than others? A new study suggests that, for at least some people, the answer has to do with self-compassion. By Melissa Janson
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
October 30, 2011 12:58 PM
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...When we experience failure or other disappointments in ourselves, we can bring care and understanding to our hurt rather than punishment. We can view our foibles and imperfections in the larger context of human experience; we are not unique or alone in this arena. We can foster a balanced approach to our negative thoughts and feelings; without dismissing or exaggerating them, we can be nonjudgmental observers, capable of making reasonable adjustments and moving on.We benefit from being our own best friend and so does the world. When we love ourselves, we strengthen our capacity for empathy. Without self-compassion, we cannot be truly compassionate toward others. Psychologist and Buddhist teacher Jack Kornfield says, ".... compassion is a circle that encompasses all beings, including ourselves. Compassion blossoms only when we remember ourselves and others, when the two sides are in harmony." by Marcia McConnell Ranch
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
October 19, 2011 1:22 PM
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The power of self-compassion is not just an idea; it's very real and actually manifests in our bodies. When we soothe our own pain, we are tapping into the mammalian care-giving system. In my work I have defined self-compassion as having three main interacting components: self-kindness, a sense of common humanity and mindfulness. Self-kindness refers to the tendency to be caring and understanding with oneself rather than being harshly critical or judgmental. Instead of taking a cold "stiff-upper-lip" approach in times of suffering, self-kindness offers soothing and comfort to the self. Common humanity involves recognizing that all humans are imperfect, fail and make mistakes. by Kristin Neff
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 28, 2011 6:25 PM
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Since the 1980s, educators around the country have been urged to help children build self-esteem to make them feel good about themselves and reduce discipline problems. Now, some researchers are saying a better approach is to cultivate self-compassion in children, to help them accept their struggles and guard against self-absorption. There’s a burgeoning area of psychological study focused on self-compassion. Kristin Neff, a University of Texas at Austin professor and pioneer in the field, has conducted research [PDF] showing people who are more self-compassionate have less anxiety and depression and tend to be happier. by Eleanor Yang Su
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 28, 2011 6:23 PM
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she shares a tip about self compassion. When the negative chatter starts, think about the words we would use with someone else who is affected by weight stigma. Chances are, our words would be encouraging, motivating and compassionate. Can we do the same for ourselves? Talk to yourself like you would talk to others.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 22, 2011 8:27 PM
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For some, divorce is a bump in the road. For other, it is a tragedy that can take years to overcome – if ever. A new study attempts to explain this variation in outcomes in terms of one particular personality trait — self-compassion. Self-compassion was defined by researchers as a combination of kindness toward oneself, recognition of common humanity and the ability to let painful emotions pass.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 9, 2011 6:08 PM
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As a student of the dharma and psychology, I get very excited to find that many recent research findings are remarkably consistent with dharma teachings. Recently, I published the following blog on my work website about research findings on self-compassion. This is a term coined by psychologist and researcher Dr. Kristin Neff, a faculty member at the University of Texas in Austin. Self-compassion is very similar to the Buddhist concept of maitri. by Iektje van Bolhuis
Shambhala Times Community News Magazine
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
August 19, 2011 3:12 PM
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Learn how to give up insecurity and self recrimination in this tender conversation with Kristin Neff, PhD, author of Self-Compassion. Compassion is one of the most misunderstood yet life-changing skills in our emotional toolkit. It connects us deeply to all of humanity and in doing so offers us access to true open-heartedness. Listen to how in practicing self compassion we give up the painful judgments that turn normal human suffering into failure and replace it with a self soothing voice of kindness.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
August 14, 2011 12:14 PM
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Most people in Western cultures are pretty self-condemning, at least in the privacy of our own heads. According to researcher Kristin Neff, author of "Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind, people who are self-compassionate fare better in each scenario. Those who receive even that small cue to be self-compassionate about the doughnut are more likely to restrain themselves from binging on the candy later. Those who score highest on the self-compassion test are least likely to get defensive about their flaws and most likely to take responsibility for their mistakes. In a study, those who receive even that small cue to be self-compassionate about taste-testing doughnut are more likely to restrain themselves from binging on the candy later.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
January 13, 2012 2:13 PM
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An evolving one-year project to help me (and others) increase self-compassion. I plan to explore every technique, review relevant books, and maybe interview any experts who will talk to me. I’ve been reading books all afternoon on self-compassion. I compiled some quotes I really like and wrote a post for my Psychology Today blog. You can read it here.
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Rescooped by
Edwin Rutsch
from Empathy and Education
December 31, 2011 1:13 PM
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Corina Andronache writes about the three stages of self-compassion and their larger implication in creating a better world when practiced... Self-compassion is a choice. With intention, we can choose to feed the nurturing and caring voice. I am choosing to believe that at all times I have been exactly where I’m supposed to be. The desire to change “what is” can become the source of my suffering. Loving what is at all times is a true sign of self-compassion. Not accepting reality as is will create a vicious cycle that will become difficult to overcome. In the end, we would have to fight not only the reality of the unfolding events, but the thoughts, feelings and emotions associated with that situation. Self-compassion requires us to learn how to be with what is in a way that we allow life to take its course and not go against the grain.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
December 10, 2011 6:19 PM
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Vieten: I want to start with a basic question, but since you’ve studied it now for over a decade, it may not be as simple as it seems on the surface: What exactly is self-compassion? Neff: It is a deep question. I didn’t come up with it; it’s a 2500-year-old idea. I first learned about self-compassion by learning about Buddhism. The thing that struck me in Buddhism is that they talk about compassion for self just as much as compassion for others. When I decided I wanted to do research on the topic, I read every Buddhist book I could get my hands on to try to get an understanding of what this practice of compassion is, and I came up with my three-component model to define self-compassion. Basically, self-compassion involves treating yourself with kindness, caring, nurturance, and concern, rather than being harshly judgmental or indifferent to your suffering.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
December 2, 2011 6:04 PM
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The other night I went to my first Compassionate Practice group meeting. Before that night I never made a distinction between self-compassion and self-esteem; I had an inkling that they were profoundly different, I just didn’t know how. On the surface the two concepts seem similar, but differ in a few primarily different ways. Self-esteem is often a measurement (self-evaluation) of our self-worth; our perceived value; and on a scale of 1 to 10, how much we like ourselves.... Self-compassion is available to everyone; it is not dependent on external circumstances, and therefore remains steady through all of life’s ups and downs. by Grace Bezanson
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
November 3, 2011 1:47 PM
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In this workshop, you will learn to stop being so hard on yourself, handle difficult emotions with greater ease, and motivate yourself with kindness rather than criticism with Dr. Kristin Neff, the leading expert on self compassion. Join us online as Dr. Neff presents her workshop at the Ecumenical Center. Together, we'll learn to respond in a kind, compassionate way whenever we are experiencing painful emotions. We all want to avoid pain, but letting it in—and responding compassionately to our own imperfections without harsh self-condemnation—are essential steps toward living happier, more fulfilling lives. Through discussion, mindfulness practice, and self-compassion exercises, you will gain practical skills and take essential steps toward living a happier, more fulfilling life. more about Kristin Neff http://cultureofempathy.com/References/Experts/Kristin-Neff.htm
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
October 27, 2011 2:58 PM
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In Nonviolent Communication we come to understand empathy as the capacity to be fully present with another, accompanying them as they experience and/or express what is alive for them in a given moment. We learn how to differentiate between empathy and other ways of being with another (such as sympathy, reassurance, advising, educating, etc.) We hone the skill of being a spacious, non-judgmental presence as we listen. We become skilled at hearing the feelings and needs being expressed. by Leah Boyd
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
October 2, 2011 6:28 PM
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Self-compassion can help the newly divorced get through one of the most difficult periods of their lives, researchers suggest. They explained that self-compassion -- a combination of kindness toward oneself, recognition of common humanity, and the ability to let painful emotions pass -- "can promote resilience and positive outcomes in the face of divorce." University of Arizona researchers studied 38 men and 67 women... By Robert Preidt
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 28, 2011 6:24 PM
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SUNDAY, Sept. 25 (HealthDay News) -- Self-compassion can help the newly divorced get through one of the most difficult periods of their lives, researchers suggest. They explained that self-compassion -- a combination of kindness toward oneself, recognition of common humanity, and the ability to let painful emotions pass -- "can promote resilience and positive outcomes in the face of divorce." The University of Arizona researchers studied 38 men and 67 women with an average age of 40 who were married for more than 13 years and were divorced for an average of three to four months. Those with higher levels of self-compassion were able to recover faster from the emotional impact of divorce.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 22, 2011 8:29 PM
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Find out why applying the Golden Rule to yourself can boost your confidence and may help you achieve your goals. It happens to the best of us: You beat yourself up for losing your patience with the kids or for having that extra scoop of ice cream after dinner. But according to new research in the growing field of self-compassion, people who are too hard on themselves are more likely to suffer from depression, anxiety and pessimism. They also tend to feel more isolated and have poor coping skills. Individuals who are less critical of themselves, on the other hand, typically have a higher sense of competence and self-worth and lead happier, healthier lives. By Robin Hilmantel
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 15, 2011 5:18 PM
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This is a moment of suffering
Suffering is part of life
May I be kind to myself in this moment May I give myself the compassion I need. This is a mantra that Kristin Neff, author of Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind, shared on my radio show recently when I asked her how do you begin to be kind to yourself. Her book is an eloquent mix of strong social science research and her own personal stories of finding the power of self-kindness during the discovery and healing process of her son’s autism.
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
September 9, 2011 2:23 PM
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Since the 1980s, educators in California and elsewhere have been urged to help children build self-esteem to make them feel good about themselves and reduce discipline problems. Now, some researchers are saying a better approach is to cultivate self-compassion in children, to help them accept their struggles and guard against self-absorption. There's a burgeoning area of psychological study focused on self-compassion. Kristin Neff, a University of Texas at Austinprofessor and pioneer in the field, has conducted research showing people who are more self-compassionate have less anxiety and depression and tend to be happier.
img http://bit.ly/ljnIZb
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Scooped by
Edwin Rutsch
August 17, 2011 2:49 PM
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Self-compassion may help curb the self-critical thoughts and emotional distress that fuel overeating. If you’ve ever tried a diet or another “no-fail” weight-loss recipe only to meet more failure than success, you’ve probably wondered what’s wrong with you. Rather than beat yourself up for not trying hard enough, you ’d do better to try a new ingredient for sustainable weight loss: self-compassion. The assertion that kindness, not self-discipline, is the missing ingredient in most weight-loss plans is supported by a growing body of psychological research
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