There have been a handful of truly great discoveries throughout history, monumental moments where any attempt to describe what really happened quickly gets lost in the morass of language and imagery, eventually reduced to trivial words like “epiphany” or “miracle” or “genius.”
But never before has a discovery been so monumental, so earth-changing, as the one I’ve just made. You see, I’ve discovered how to end all political polarization, how to bring us together in a never-ending sequence of kumbaya moments that will make a 1960’s Hare Krishna love fest seem like little more than a tear-gas-infused riot.
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