Social Culture: Americana
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Social Culture: Americana
Insight. Entertainment. Style.
Curated by Vilma Bonilla
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Jewish Wisdom

Jewish Wisdom | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

 Your Daily Dose of Jewish Wisdom: A passive life is an anxious life.

A healthy life is a life that makes a difference, making an impact on all around, uplifting them and bringing in more light. ❤️

 

 

Vilma Bonilla's insight:

We are all here for a reason. Live with purpose. This beautiful message is courtesy of Chabad.org (@chabadorg) on Instagram.

 

Happy Friday, enjoy. 

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Moody: March 2019 

Moody: March 2019  | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

Moods. Feelings. Vibes.  

A magazine for the mind, body and soul. 

 Featured articles, images, and music. 

By: Vilma Bonilla

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
The love we grow in our hearts is the greatest gift we have to give. Love yourself, always. Live with purpose. Make all the moments and the struggles count. Stay inspired and find the good in each day. ❤️
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Why Warner Bros., Spotify & More Are Moving to LA's Arts District

Why Warner Bros., Spotify & More Are Moving to LA's Arts District | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

"Los Angeles’ Arts District undergoes a renaissance as industry players move downtown to better connect with Eastside creatives..."

Vilma Bonilla's insight:

Good move. Art inspires and heals. L.A.'s Art District is amazing. There's always something new, beautiful, and vibrant to see and experience. Creativity abounds. So sweet and so golden. I love it. 

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DAILY DOSE: The Simple Path

DAILY DOSE: The Simple Path | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
You ask, “How can I be happy if I am not?” 

True, you can’t control the way you feel, but you do have control over your conscious thought, speech and actions. 

Do something simple: Think good thoughts, speak good things, behave the way a joyful person behaves—even if you don’t fully feel it inside. Eventually, the inner joy of the soul will break through.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
I love this daily dose of wisdom! ❤️
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Call My Name


Provided to YouTube by Universal Music Group 
Call My Name ℗ 2019 I'm With Her, LLC., Under exclusive license to Rounder Records


Vilma Bonilla's insight:
I heard this song on the radio. Me likeyyy. Happy Tuesday! ❤️
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My Smile

My Smile | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
Peaceful California girl vibes. A photograph of of yours truly taken last year. It's a good one. Good vibes only, baby!
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Enjoy your week, friends! ❤️
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Shabbat Shalom

Shabbat Shalom | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
May your days be filled with peace and love. ❤️
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Enjoy our weekend!
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DaniLeigh: Lil Bebe

DaniLions! Listen and share my new single ''Lil BeBe" out now! https://Danileigh.lnk.to/LilBeBe ;

More from DaniLeigh: http://www.iamdanileigh.com

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Thursday MOOD!  ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️
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Farewell Speech: Senator Hatch calls on us to “heed our better angels” and strive for unity

"Washington, DC—This morning, Senator Orrin Hatch (R-UT), the President Pro Tempore of the United States Senate and the longest-serving Republican Senator in history, delivered his farewell address on the Senate floor. In his remarks—which bring to a close more than four decades of public service—Senator Hatch urged his colleagues and the American people to “heed the better angels of our nature” by recommitting to comity, restoring civility to the public discourse, embracing the principles of pluralism, and striving for unity by rejecting the politics of division"

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
A beautiful speech about friendship, congeniality, and good will. The Senate must work together and compromise for the good of the country because “the Senate sets the tone of American civic life... If we are divided, then the nation is divided.” ❤️

"The 84-year-old Hatch was first elected to the Senate in 1977, and will leave the upper chamber as the longest-serving Republican senator in U.S. history. He announced his retirement in January. Former Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney won the November election to assume his seat."--Source: https://www.nationalreview.com/news/orrin-hatch-farewell-speech-senate-as-an-institution-is-in-crisis/
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Paradise (Remastered)

Provided to YouTube by Sony Music Entertainment Paradise (Remastered Version) · Sade The Ultimate Collection ℗ 2011 Sony Music Entertainment UK Limited.

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Sade mood feels so fine on a Friday. 

"Feels like you're mine. Feels right. So fine. I'm yours. You're mine like paradise!---Oooh, what a life." ❤️

Smile. relax. Enjoy your weekend, friends. Shabbat shalom.

Xoxo, 
 V.B.
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LISTEN: November 2018

LISTEN: November 2018 | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

 Music and orchestral sounds that move, motivate, and inspire human emotion. Feel it deep down in your soul, baby! ❤️

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
"There once was a note: listen." Sometimes there are no words to express how you feel.

Hope you enjoy my newly created magazine for my love of music and those eternal notes that ring in our ears. Enjoy!  
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Preparing for Rosh Hashanah

Preparing for Rosh Hashanah | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
During Elul and the High Holy Days, we are given the gift of teshuva, of return - to ourselves, to our loved ones and to God. There is no more auspicious time in the Jewish calendar than now to iron out the inevitable creases in our hearts and mend the rifts in our souls that rob us of exuding our natural spiritual beauty. 

The following 16 prompts are an effective way to embark on your own process of returning to your deepest essence and greatest potential. 

Find a quiet time and place, a notebook and a pen, perhaps put on some gentle music, and begin to write your responses to these prompts in your journal. In the first eight questions you’ll be meeting your true self, up close and personal. You’ll be accessing your deepest dreams and desires for yourself in the year ahead and finding the unique beauty of your soul. 

Once you have touched your core, you will then be able to examine what are the areas that obscure this authentic self and higher knowing. Self-knowledge is self-power. 

May you be blessed with Divine assistance in your pursuit for deeper connection and a truly good and sweet new year.

Connecting to your True Self

1. What are some of your greatest gifts and resources that Hashem has given you? 
2. What do you want most for the coming year? 
3. What are you grateful for in your life right now/ this past year?
4. What are some of the significant milestones, events, breakthroughs, accomplishments etc. from this previous year? (year in review) 
5. When in general did you feel most alive? 
6. What are some of the biggest struggles you’ve had this past year? (When you felt most alienated from your true self?) 
7. In what areas have you grown the most? 
8. What are some of your greatest insights that you now have that you didn’t have as strongly last year?

How do I implement this? 

1. What are some of your top areas of priority that require your attention? 
2.  How could you utilize your God-given gifts better to bring greater light into the world? 
3.  What behaviors are blocking you from being your best self? What can you do to reduce and eliminate these behaviors? 
4. If there was one trait that you would like to change to be a more balanced person, what would it be? Can you think of a way to bring yourself into better balance in this area? 
5. What recurring thoughts do you have that make you feel fearful, anxious, lonely, depressed or alone? What would be more spiritually productive thoughts to have in these moments? 
6. What is one area in your relationship with God that you would like to improve in? What is a practical step you can take work on this?
7. List one area in your interpersonal relationships that you would like to improve in. How can you implement this change in one small way that you can do consistently? 
8. What is one area in your relationship with yourself that you would like to improve? How can you begin to work on this?
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
The month of Elul is my favorite. I see it as an important time of introspection. In this world, we lack nothing. It doesn't take much to be happy, except perhaps the intention that comes from greater self-awareness, understanding, and focus. Given time, effort, and focused attention, anything is possible. Returning to our true essance and connecting with ourselves, others, and God is so awesome! 

We live from day to day working for hard earned pay that we barely have time to enjoy the present or plan for a brighter tomorrow. It's important to stop and honestly think about our lives in terms of our past, present, and future. Taking inventory of our stregths and weaknesses on a regular basis is important for clarity, understanding, and improvement. Self-knowledge is the key to life. It is the only way to get what we truly want out of life. Much of this inner work is done in solitude, however, the support of friends, family, and community is important to our success. Nothing worth having in life comes easy. Life is a journey full of pleasure, pain, and everything in between. We live to love and be loved. Love is everything and every-thing takes work. 

Enjoy your weekend, friends! Shabbat Shalom.  
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No one owes you anything: A letter from Harry Browne to his daughter.

No one owes you anything: A letter from Harry Browne to his daughter. | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
During the darkest part of the night, who do you blame? Do you know who Mr. Browne is? According to Wikipedia, Harry Browne (1933 – 2006) was a free-market libertarian writer and investment analyst who was the Presidential candidate of the United States Libertarian Party in 1996 and 2000. He was also Director of the American Liberty Foundation.

I don’t know what these characteristics translate into or even the kind of person Harry Browne was. I did, however, come across this letter he wrote at Christmas to his then nine-year old daughter. The letter was dated December 25, 1966.

I have shared Harry’s letter over the years with circles of friends and family. The responses have varied. Some have whole-heartedly agreed with Harry, yet some reacted with defensiveness, even contempt, not only for Mr. Browne, but toward me for sharing. Some felt the letter was cynical, harsh, even cruel. There were also those who thought that Harry’s words to his daughter offered them a new perspective on life.

For me, the letter was a great reminder of the expectations we attach to people, outcomes and situations, and the potential blame we assign when we don’t receive what we have desired.

Who is responsible for life’s outcomes? Who is responsible for our experiences? ***

Harry’s letter to his daughter: It’s Christmas and I have the usual problem of deciding what to give you. I know you might enjoy many things — books, games, clothes.

But I’m very selfish. I want to give you something that will stay with you for more than a few months or years. I want to give you a gift that might remind you of me every Christmas.

If I could give you just one thing, I’d want it to be a simple truth that took me many years to learn. If you learn it now, it may enrich your life in hundreds of ways. And it may prevent you from facing many problems that have hurt people who have never learned it.

The truth is simply this: No one owes you anything. 

Significance
 How could such a simple statement be important? It may not seem so, but understanding it can bless your entire life. 

No one owes you anything.

It means that no one else is living for you, my child. Because no one is you. Each person is living for himself; his own happiness is all he can ever personally feel. 

When you realize that no one owes you happiness or anything else, you’ll be freed from expecting what isn’t likely to be.

It means no one has to love you. If someone loves you, it’s because there’s something special about you that gives him happiness. Find out what that something special is and try to make it stronger in you, so that you’ll be loved even more. 

When people do things for you, it’s because they want to — because you, in some way, give them something meaningful that makes them want to please you, not because anyone owes you anything.

No one has to like you. If your friends want to be with you, it’s not out of duty. Find out what makes others happy so they’ll want to be near you. 

No one has to respect you. Some people may even be unkind to you. But once you realize that people don’t have to be good to you, and may not be good to you, you’ll learn to avoid those who would harm you. For you don’t owe them anything either.

Living your Life 
No one owes you anything.

You owe it to yourself to be the best person possible. Because if you are, others will want to be with you, want to provide you with the things you want in exchange for what you’re giving to them.

Some people will choose not to be with you for reasons that have nothing to do with you. When that happens, look elsewhere for the relationships you want. Don’t make someone else’s problem your problem.

Once you learn that you must earn the love and respect of others, you’ll never expect the impossible and you won’t be disappointed. Others don’t have to share their property with you, nor their feelings or thoughts.

If they do, it’s because you’ve earned these things. And you have every reason to be proud of the love you receive, your friends’ respect, the property you’ve earned. But don’t ever take them for granted. If you do, you could lose them. They’re not yours by right; you must always earn them.

My Experience 
A great burden was lifted from my shoulders the day I realized that no one owes me anything. For so long as I’d thought there were things I was entitled to, I’d been wearing myself out —physically and emotionally — trying to collect them.

No one owes me moral conduct, respect, friendship, love, courtesy, or intelligence. And once I recognized that, all my relationships became far more satisfying. I’ve focused on being with people who want to do the things I want them to do. 

That understanding has served me well with friends, business associates, lovers, sales prospects, and strangers. It constantly reminds me that I can get what I want only if I can enter the other person’s world. I must try to understand how he thinks, what he believes to be important, what he wants. Only then can I appeal to someone in ways that will bring me what I want.

And only then can I tell whether I really want to be involved with someone. And I can save the important relationships for those with whom I have the most in common. 

It’s not easy to sum up in a few words what has taken me years to learn. But maybe if you re-read this gift each Christmas, the meaning will become a little clearer every year.

I hope so, for I want more than anything else for you to understand this simple truth that can set you free: 

 No one owes you anything.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
“Everything you want in life has a price connected to it. There’s a price to pay if you want to make things better, a price to pay just for leaving things as they are, a price for everything.” — Harry Browne 

I read this letter a father wrote to his daughter. It is honest and powerful. People do things because they want to period end of story.--"When people do things for you, it’s because they want to — because you, in some way, give them something meaningful that makes them want to please you, not because anyone owes you anything."

We can't always get what we want. No on owes us anything; not even parents, children, friends, or spouses. That's life. We have only ourselves to turn when seeking answers for undesired outcomes.

"Each person is living for himself; his own happiness is all he can ever personally feel. 

When you realize that no one owes you happiness or anything else, you’ll be freed from expecting what isn’t likely to be. 

It means no one has to love you. If someone loves you, it’s because there’s something special about you that gives him happiness. Find out what that something special is and try to make it stronger in you, so that you’ll be loved even more."

Be kind. Be true to yourself and others. Most of all love your life, and focus on the good. Enjoy your days, friends!  ❤️
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March 2019

March 2019 | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

News + Culture + Style: Business, Politics, Sports, Fashion
A taste of Americana in one sexy, trendy magazine

Magazine creator and editor: Vilma Bonilla

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
These are my featured story selections for 2019 infused with some music and humor. Levity is a key to life. Smile. Laugh. Enjoy life. ❤️

 

Xoxo, 
V.B.

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Shabbat Shalom

Shabbat Shalom | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

Image courtesy of @israellechaim on Instagram.

 

 

 

Vilma Bonilla's insight:

Today is International Women’s Day. To all the women out there that make the world a better place, G*d bless the ground beneath your feet and your dear and cherished light. Shine bright, baby! ❤️

 

Empowering women around the world is an imperative. Here are some articles on what the current U.S. administration is doing to support women..

 

The Beneficial Ripple Effects of Greater Women’s Empowerment

https://www.bloomberg.com/amp/opinion/articles/2019-03-06/ivanka-trump-s-women-s-empowerment-initiative-is-well-designed?__twitter_impression=true

 

Trump budget to include $100M for Ivanka’s women’s fund

https://apnews.com/254320e852d0453591b7a682050c3689

 

 

 

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Game Recap: February 27, 2019

Game Recap: February 27, 2019 | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

The Miami HEAT defeated the Golden State Warriors 126-125 Wednesday night at American Airlines Arena. Goran Dragić led the way for the HEAT with 27 points.

 

1. Wade Wins It 

 

For well over a decade, Dwyane Wade has provided Miami with memories that’ll last a lifetime. 

 

And now, it’s time to add another to the ledger. Thanks to that crazy shot, Wade led the team with 10 points on 4-of-6 shooting in the fourth, as he laid it all on the line to give the HEAT a much-needed win. 

 

In all, the 37-year-old vet tallied 25 points on 10-of-17 shooting, including 5-of-8 from deep, seven rebounds, three assists, two blocks and a steal.

 

2. Dragić Dominates The 2Q 

 

So…Dragić pretty much took over the second quarter. 

 

Like really took over. 

 

All told, the Dragon scored 20 points in the period (yes, 20) on 5-of-7 shooting thanks to a bunch of pull-up jumpers. Then again, he capped off his flurry with this tough runner even though a few Warriors were in the vicinity.

 

And while Dragić didn’t score as much in the second half, he put his body on the line and drew a charge on Andre Iguodala in transition early in the fourth. 

 

In addition to his team-high 27 points on 7-of-11 shooting, including 4-of-7 from downtown, Dragić also had three rebounds, an assist and a team-high plus-13 rating.

 

3. J. Rich Finds The Range 

 

Although Josh Richardson got off to a slow start, he really picked things up in the second half and scored 16 points after the break. 

 

After a nice little run in the third quarter, Richardson continued to space the floor in the fourth and knocked down this important three: J. Rich ended up with 21 points on 7-of-14 shooting, including 5-of-7 from beyond the arc, five rebounds and five assists.

 

Other Takeaways: 

 

-Bam Adebayo had this crazy alley-oop jam with contact over Kevin Durant in the second quarter. That wasn’t all, though, as Adebayo defended Durant and Steph Curry quite well on the perimeter on a handful of possessions.

 

The 21-year-old finished with 11 points on 3-of-5 shooting, a team-high 10 boards, four assists and two blocks.

 

Game Notes: 

 

-James Johnson (Slight Left AC Sprain), Yante Maten and Emanuel Terry (Sioux Falls Assignment) were inactive. 

-Hassan Whiteside (Hip Strain) was an active scratch. 

 

Looking Ahead: 

 

-The HEAT are back in action on Thursday night against the Rockets in Houston. After that, Miami will travel home to prepare for its matchup with the Nets on Saturday at 7:30 PM. 

 

 

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
I like both teams but the Miami Heat will always be my favorite. I missed an awesome game last night. I watched the previous game earlier this week between the Heat and the Suns. The Heat lost against the Suns but it was a really close game too and really exciting to watch. 
 
Miami is a competitive team. They play hard and make every second on the court count. That is the way life should be. The challenges and struggles really make the game of basketball fun and worth watching.

The Last Dance tour is the best! I love it. Wade will be missed next year. The legendary "Dwayne Braid" is playing his heart out and I'm hoping the Heat make the playoffs. 
 
There is nothing like love and basketball, baby!
❤️❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️ ❤️❤️❤️❤️
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A Blueprint for Healing

A Blueprint for Healing | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
A funny thing happened at the gym. My favorite class is called “Intensati,” where we pound it out to high-intensity aerobics as we repeat the call of the instructor who is yelling out positive affirmations—kind of like positive psychology on your feet. One little part of the routine is to clap your hands together overhead, then in front of you, finished by a clap behind your back. This particular move is called “Appreciation” (don’t ask me why). Some women who are fit and athletic jump in the air, while others, like me, who are averse to bouncing, prefer to stay more grounded. After this went on for a bit, the instructor had us form two large circles we would have to jump up while reaching out and clapping the hands of the woman on either side.
 
How was this going to work, I wondered? We are such different heights and varying capabilities. And yet, as we began, I noticed that instinctively, each woman’s hand met every other’s woman’s hand without fail. After a few rounds, I heard the instructor yell out 16! 15! 14! And I realized (with some alarm) that we were counting down that many repetitions, and now that I was performing them albeit with more effort, I didn’t think I had that many moves in me. But, of course, I did it—16 times—because the woman to my right and the woman to my left needed my hand to be there—16 times. And it wasn’t even that big of a deal, after all. Because when you connect to other people, when you are part of a community, even briefly, you get to be a stronger, bigger, and better version of yourself. 
 
The Third Time’s the Charm
 
In Vayakhel, we read again about the building of the Mishkan, the portable tabernacle in the desert. First, in future tense, the Torah provided us with the details of how to build it. But then the Torah gives us the exact same information in the past tense—what we did, in fact, build. Why the repetition? Is this a version of spiritual gymnastics? 
 
“If you believe you can destroy, believe you can repair.” — Reb Nachman of Breslov
 
By most accounts, the building of the Mishkan occurred after the sin of the Golden Calf, which created a spiritual rift between G‑d and the Jewish people. What relationship doesn’t experience episodic moments of disconnection, a protective shrinking back to one’s own borders in the face of pain and confusion? Under the right circumstances, even the most robust bonds can fray or snap. Until the moment the universe personally slams us up against the wall, our hypothetical reactions to challenges are all untested dogma. We like to think that we know who we are, but sometimes, especially when we feel betrayed, we break the faith, we shatter, and like Humpty Dumpty, we fall from the wall of our beliefs of how the world is supposed to be. And then what? What’s our next best move?
 
Where Do You Want to Go From Here? 
 
The message of Vayakhel is this: Gather up your broken pieces and rebuild. Construct a holy sanctuary. Don’t wallow in despair and self-defeat. Reconnect. Restore. Repair. G‑d gave us an eternal set of blueprints with which to reconstruct after we self-destruct—a spiritual compass by which to regain our bearings, and to achieve happiness and joy even after we’ve taken a beating and endured loss.
 
How do we get there? Not by being passive. We can’t create resilience in dark times or heal by the mere act of looking at a set of blueprints. We actually have to build something. We have to construct that which we have been shown is possible so as to come out on the other side and say, Look what I created! This is not a one-and-done thing. And no one can do it alone.
 
While officiating at a funeral, a rabbi remarked to the circle of graveside mourners: “Judaism is not a spectator sport.” Quite right. Judaism is a “team sport.” We built the holy Mishkan as a community, and each tribe camped around it. For the strength of a community lies in a circle of unbroken connection, facing the center, the Source from which our true power emanates.
 
As a portable structure, the Mishkan was designed to move with us. In the 40 years of our wanderings, we broke and set up camp over and We break. We heal. We break again. over, sometimes even coming back to a place where we had previously encamped. Today, we are over here. Tomorrow, we may be someplace else. Some days, we find ourselves back in a place that we thought we had outgrown, and we come face to face with that old dragon again. We break. We heal. We break again as we lose and then regain our center. Perhaps the measure of our ability to make peace with this cycle is the speed with which we regain our spiritual equilibrium. Otherwise, we may fall down the proverbial rabbit hole.
 
Holy Brokenness
 
To be whole is to be holy, to keep what is eternally true at the center of your world and the core of your being. But it ain’t easy. On those days when you want to give up, where you feel like you can’t reassemble the broken pieces or jump in the air one more time, know one thing for certain: We’ve got this! Our hands will meet, and somehow, it will be OK. 
 
G‑d told us that when we build the Mishkan, He will dwell—not within it, but within us. We are not alone. We have G‑d. And we have each other. That is a pretty good message, and one worth repeating, even for the third time.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
“If you believe you can destroy, believe you can repair.” — Reb Nachman of Breslov 
 
"Until the moment the universe personally slams us up against the wall, our hypothetical reactions to challenges are all untested dogma. We like to think that we know who we are, but sometimes, especially when we feel betrayed, we break the faith, we shatter, and like Humpty Dumpty, we fall from the wall of our beliefs of how the world is supposed to be. And then what? What’s our next best move?" 
 
The happiness that blooms from within requires constant loving care, connection, and self healing. We are all constantly under construction. Healing and renewal are a part of life to be embraced. Loving kindness, compassion, and support are gifts we can offer each other every day. —“Love is the only goal that can bring peace to any soul.”
 
The author of this piece rightfully asserts that: "This is not a one-and-done thing. And no one can do it alone."
 
We are not here on this earth to judge and destroy each other. The only person we can focus on improving is ourselves. Make every moment matter. Live your best life with love and purpose. It is not easy but important to find the good in every day and enjoy the moments. Happy Wednesday! ❤️ 
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Wander Over Yonder: Friendship

An awesome Disney XD show that ended after two seasons. 
This is a clip from the last episode.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
"Because an enemy is just a friend you haven't made yet ... You'd be amazed at what you can grow from a little bit of kindness. It's never too late for a fresh start!"--Truth and humor in animation. Wednesday cartoon love.

Friendship is a gift and laughter is healing. Seeing the world from a child's persepective is awesome! Enjoy your week, friends. ❤️ 
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#KissAndMakeUp Anti-Bullying Initiative—Tarte's Nationwide School Tour

#KissAndMakeUp Anti-Bullying Initiative—Tarte's Nationwide School Tour | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it
If you're a fan of Tarte Cosmetics, then you'll know that quality makeup in cute AF packaging only scratches the surface when it comes to everything the brand is capable of. This past August 2018, Tarte celebrated another year of its #KissAndMakeUp initiative, launched in 2016 and aimed at putting an end to cyberbullying by spreading kindness. Now, in honor of October being National Bullying Prevention month, Tarte's #KissAndMakeUp campaign is embarking on a nationwide school tour. 

The core purpose of Tarte's original #KissAndMakeUp campaign was to drown out hate with love. Wherever you saw mean comments on social media, Tarte encouraged you to comment kiss mark emojis as a way to overpower the bullying — because no one needs that kind of negativity in their life. The brand has also continuously partnered with the Tyler Clementi Foundation, a non-profit organization whose goal is to end cyberbullying, since the campaign's launch. The initiative even partly inspired the brand to start their own non-profit, "Heart to Tarte," as a way to give back even more as a brand.
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***This is an excerpt of the original post on the Elite Daily website. To view the post in it's entirety, click on the link or image.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
October is "National Bullying Prevention" month. I really like Tarte's sweet, nationwide #KissAndMakeUp campaign and school tour. The cosmetics company, came up with their own #KissAndMakeUp initiative aimed at putting an end to cyberbullying by spreading kindness.
 
Bullying is a serious issue both online and in the real world. Awareness is important. Choose kindess, compassion and understanding. Let love rule! 
 
 
 
Enjoy your days, friends! 
 
Love Always, 
V.B.
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How to Collaborate with People You Don’t Like

How to Collaborate with People You Don’t Like | Social Culture: Americana | Scoop.it

A few months ago, a former client — let’s call her Kacie— called me to check in. I had supported her through her transition when she had joined a prestigious global financial services firm several months prior. Given how deliberately and thoughtfully she’d gone through the process, I expected that our conversation would be about her early wins. 

 

Instead, Kacie confessed that she had a simple but serious problem: she wasn’t getting along well with a peer-level executive — let’s call her Marta. The two had gotten off on the wrong foot, and as time passed things weren’t getting any better. Kacie told me that it was becoming painfully clear that her inability to get along with Marta was going to impede her success, and possibly derail her career at the company.

 

As Kacie and I explored the situation, she told me that Marta was seen as a highly talented, accomplished, and well-liked executive — she wasn’t toxic or difficult. But Kacie admitted that she didn’t really like Marta. They had different styles, and Marta rubbed her the wrong way.

 

Over a series of conversations, Kacie and I worked through the situation. She revisited the stakeholder map she had created in her first few weeks in the role, which clearly showed that Marta’s collaboration and partnership were essential for getting the business results Kacie wanted. In assessing the relationship more honestly, Kacie came to realize that she had been failing to reach out to Marta. She had not made her new colleague feel like her input and perspectives were valuable, had been leaving her and her team off communications, and had more or less been trying to avoid her.

 

Kacie developed a handful of useful strategies for working better with Marta. While none were particularly easy or comfortable, these are ideas and insights that almost anyone can use when they have to work with someone they just don’t like.

 

Reflect on the cause of tension and how you are responding to it. 

 

The first step is both acceptance and reflection. Remind yourself: You won’t get along with everyone but there is potential value in every interaction with others. You can and should learn from almost everyone you meet, and the responsibility for making that happen lies with you even if the relationship is not an easy one. Take an honest look at what is causing the tension and what role you play in creating it. It may be that your reaction to the situation is at the core of the problem (and you can’t control anything other than your reaction). Kacie had to recognize that Marta’s “unlikability” may really have been about Kacie herself.

 

Work harder to understand the other person’s perspective. 

 

Few people get out of bed in the morning with the goal of making your life miserable. Make time to think deliberately about the other person’s point of view, especially if that person is essential to your success. Ask yourself: Why is this person acting this way? What might be motivating them? How do they see me? What might they want and need from me? Kacie began to think differently about Marta as she came to appreciate that her colleague had goals and motivations as valid as her own and that their goals were not inherently in conflict.

 

Become a problem solver rather than a critic or competitor. 

 

To work better together, it’s important to shift from a competitive stance to a collaborative one. One tactic is to “give” the other person the problem. Rather than trying to work through or around the other person, engage them directly. Kacie invited Marta out to lunch and was open with her: “I don’t feel like we are working together as effectively as we could. What do you think? Do you have any ideas for how we can work better together?” If you ask people to show you their cards, and demonstrate vulnerability in the process, they will often reveal a few of their own.

 

Ask more questions. 

 

In tense situations, many of us try to “tell” our way through it. We might become overly assertive, which usually makes the situation worse. Instead, try asking questions — ideally open-ended ones intended to create conversation. Put aside your own agenda, ask good questions, and have the patience to truly listen to the other person’s answers.

 

Enhance your awareness of your interpersonal style. 

 

It’s easy to chalk up conflicts to poor “chemistry” with another person but everyone has different styles and often being aware of those differences can help. Over lunch, Marta and Kacie discovered that they had both completed the Myers-Briggs earlier in their careers, so they shared their profiles. Kacie is both a clear introvert and a very strong sensing type: she prefers to have time to work through issues alone and quietly, and to draw conclusions from a broad base of data. Marta, on the other hand, is an extrovert and a strong intuitive type, comfortable reacting immediately, focusing on the big picture, and solving problems by talking them through with others. Given these differences in style and preference, Kacie and Marta were bound to find interacting with each other uncomfortable. But once they identified their differences, they realized that their styles could be quite complementary if they adapted and accommodated their approaches.

 

Ask for help. 

 

Asking for help can reboot a difficult relationship because it shows that you value the other person’s intelligence and experience. Over their lunch, Kacie grew confident enough to say to Marta, “You’ve been around here longer than I have. I feel like I’m starting to figure things out, but I’d love your help.” Then she asked questions like: “What should I be doing more or less of? Am I missing anything or failing to connect with anyone I really should? What do you wish someone had told you when you first started working here?”

 

Kacie and Marta’s relationship significantly improved. During my last call with Kacie, she told me that she and Marta communicate frequently in-person and via text and Slack, and they regularly take part in each other’s team meetings. Each quarter they bring their whole teams together to assess progress and seek opportunities to learn and improve their processes. While Marta and Kacie aren’t necessarily friends and don’t spend a lot of time together outside the office, they’re much better colleagues, and they like each other more than they initially suspected.

 

Kacie’s success in turning around her relationship with Marta was in part because she acted while “the cement was still wet.” Her negative dynamic with Marta hadn’t yet hardened so Kacie was able to increase her self-awareness, adapt her style, and reach out. It is possible to collaborate effectively with people you don’t like, but you have to take the lead.

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
"It starts with acceptance and reflection.”—Absolutely! Teamwork is an amazing thing. A team is comprised of more than one person striving for a common cause. All contributing members are unique in their strengths and contributions. Team focus and effort is everything. We shine brighter together. 
 
How we treat people is the clearest expression of who we are as individuals and team members. It doesn't matter whether you like or agree with any particular individual as long as you are able to work together towards a common goal. 
 
Holding on to grudges and resentment about “old shit” is not productive or relevant. Be who you are and let others be who they are. Any personal conflicts that may arise in the workplace are potential management or HR issues. Nobody wants that. Distrust is malignant. It is easier to be negative, mistrust and avoid than it is to actually work on improving any relationship. This article talks about how to improve working relationships. 
 
Acceptance, kindness, and compassion costs nothing and makes a world of difference. I don't know about you, but I like to have good days. Being able to exchange pleasantries, smile, and laugh with people is good and always appreciated. Here is another article about treating people better because we all could.—"How you treat others is how you invite them to treat you." ❤️

https://www.inc.com/lolly-daskal/9-important-ways-that-will-make-you-treat-people-better.html
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Lakers vs Heat: LeBron James & Dwyane Wade  

Disclaimer: • All rights belong to the NBA. I do not claimant. • Monetization is disabled.
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
The most beautiful dance of legends, champions, and friends. Nothing better than love, basketball, and legendary battles. Unforgettable. True brotherhood bonds never end. All love, baby!  ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Holocaust Memorial Day: She Survived 

A first hand account by a very courageous Jewish survivor of Halocaust experiments. Her words are inspiring. Despite everything she went through, she healed and she forgave. 


The past cannot changed and that is the tragedy but we can change the way we relate to it. The lessons are the blessings. Something beautiful always survives.  

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Durring world War II, a number of German physicans conducted painful and often deadly experiments on thoursands of people, including children. 

This beautiful story is about healing and forgiveness. May we all find inspiration in it. ❤️
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Book Review: Charlamagne's ‘Shook One’

Charlamagnes’ second book 'Shook One: Anxiety Playing Tricks on Me' details his ongoing journey of working through anxiety with the help of therapy.

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Anxiety is the number one mental health issue. It often goes clinically undiagnosed. It's possible to know someone (family or friend) and not really know about their daily struggles or what they've have gone through in life. Anyone who talks about their personal struggles and mental health issues is a strong and courageous human being. 

More people should talk about feelings and experiences without  fear and stigma as Charlamagne does. Honest communication is important in life. How we choose to share our feelings about any experience is a personal decision. 

Talking about our experiences and expressing our inner most thoughts and feelings is not easy because it requires admitting vulnerability. People cannot be forced to share. Opening up to anyone takes a lot courage just like seeking help in the form of therapy is not easy. However, it is important to acknolwledge feelings to ourselves and to speak our truth without fear to others. That process of sharing requires trust and it is quite liberating. 

This life can drive you crazy. Ain't "no escape from reality," baby. (Queen lyric) It takes work to fix damage and heal. Live your truth. Own it. See the light in the darkest night. Some people die in the struggle. Our mortality and vulnarability is for real. There is nothing wrong with sitting down, going deep, and doing the work to heal. 

 Enjoy your days, friends. ❤️
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2CELLOS: Viva La Vida

http://www.facebook.com/2Cellos http://www.instagram.com/2cellosofficial ;

2CELLOS Luka Sulic and Stjepan Hauser performing Viva La Vida by Coldplay.

Vilma Bonilla's insight:
Despite great struggles, pain and the disappointments we all face, this life is a beautiful journey set to a haunting, heart felt melody. For me, this life is both a glorious musical composition played with a full orchestra and a soulful harmony played by a single, solo instrument to a tune all it's own. I am grateful for it all. 

I will be waching my team, the Los Angeles Dodgers, play a good game of baseball tonight. We live for beautiful moments of joy shared with friends and family. In good times and bad, I believe in the magic of love and baseball.❤️  

This string version of Viva La Vida by David Garrett is good too.
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Bad Bunny: Bum Bum Tam Tam (Remix) Ft. J Balvin ✘ Arcangel

● Compartan el vídeo ► Deja tu like para más ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ➜ Sígueme en Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/onettrap
Vilma Bonilla's insight:
I heard this jam on Spotify last night for the first time. Killer. I love a good re-MIX! 

Enjoy your days, friends. ❤️
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