Recently my lack of empathy for someone really surprised me.
Some Blocks to Look For
Distraction, Busyness, Rushing. Empathy requires our attention. You have to notice what you don’t notice. True, an empathetic response can be completely spontaneous, and those treasured moments speak volumes about what is important to us, but more often we aren’t activating our empathy because we’re just not paying attention. ..
Your Body Can Block You. Your physiological state is as likely to block your empathy as your cognitive state...
These one-to-one empathy sessions support; well-being, healing, practicing to be a better listener and supporting you in creating empathic environments in your relationships, family, school, work, communities and beyond.
Discover the transformational impact of empathy, its importance during times of uncertainty & how you can foster it in your life.
About this Event
COVID-19 has disrupted the world. Family and friends have been separated, events have been cancelled, and the social isolation has us feeling more alone than ever before. Through the disarray, we are reminded that it takes a collective effort filled with empathy and compassion to get through hardships. During this time, your actions impact the future of your family, friends and neighbours.
Whether the problems customers call about are large or small, they all need our empathy. They need us to infuse our emails, chats, and social media responses with words that demonstrate we understand what they are feeling, we see things from their point of view, and we care.
Empathy isn’t always easy, especially now. Some frontline customer service agents think it’s optional or even risky because it implies they agree with the customer’s complaint. And even the most empathy-willing agents will struggle to show empathy when they’re overburdened.
To help, I’ve pulled together this list of 20 ways to empathize with stressed-out customers.
Listen carefully. You can help your people by giving them an opportunity to speak freely about what they're going through. Ask them how they're dealing with the current situation, and how they feel about everything that's going on.
Now comes the hard part: Listen.
Resist the urge to judge the person or their feelings, to interrupt, or to propose a solution. Instead, focus on understanding the how and the why: how the person feels, and why they feel that way.
COVID-19 has further changed the way that we think about and mobilize support globally. How will our current situation helps us create a renewed sense of empathy and open up new chapters in tackling issues of global inequity?
Join The Lewis Institute’s Senior Fellows in Social Innovation, Erin Thornton and Mary Galeti, as they share their perspectives from the global philanthropic and aid community.
The crowd at Clement's Place is primed. The acclaimed vibraphonist Stefon Harris and his band, Blackout, are onstage in this snug jazz club on the campus of Rutgers University in Newark, N.J. Harris has high ambitions. He seeks to use his instrument and his already considerable reputation to change the way people relate to each other — to create empathy. But on this night, he's also there to play.
"Empathy is essentially the science of understanding," Harris says. "And that's something that's necessary in local communities; it's necessary in elementary schools, on a collegiate level and in a corporate boardroom."
Try incorporating these empathy-building tips into your conversations:
Listen, really listen, to what your team members have to say. It is by listening that you learn about your employees—what makes them engaged and what keeps them up at night. You’ll learn how important their work is and, in the process, you’ll come to trust they have the best intentions at heart. In listening you’ll also find clues to help you support them in the ways they need.
Be cognisant of your attitude. Do you have an open mind? Are you ready to listen?
Be cognisant of your body language as well. Do you look as if you’re interested? Are you focused on them or checking your phone or email as they speak? Lack of attention can be seen on video-conferencing, just as it can in person. In fact, you can hear it in the speaker’s voice, even without the benefit of video (yes, you really can).
THE SECRET TO HAVING COMPASSION Across the world, people are in isolation in an effort to prevent the spread of COVID-19. Millions of Americans have already lost their jobs.
It is safe to say a lot of people need compassion right now. And Brown wants to help them find it.
In the video above, she made a distinction between having empathy and having compassion. Empathy, she said, is a skillset that can be taught, while compassion is more of a belief system.
... "When we can focus on behavior, we are much more likely to respond with empathy and actually change," Brown said.
The last time there was such a surge of empathy and humanity was in 2011, when the country was hit by the "great flood".
Before that, people rose to help ease the suffering of those affected by the 2004 tsunami.
Most, if not all of us, were touched by pop idol Artiwara "Toon" Kongmalai's phenomenal run from the country's southernmost tip to its northernmost point in 2017, which raised a total of 1.3 billion baht for 11 needy hospitals.
Stephen Porges, developer of the Polyvagal Theory, talks with Serge Prengel about countering the effects of social distancing. From the Relational Implicit podcast (http://relationalimplicit.com).
Stephen W. Porges, Ph.D., is Distinguished University Scientist at Indiana University, where he directs the Trauma Research Center within the Kinsey Institute.
He holds the position of Professor of Psychiatry at the University of North Carolina and Professor Emeritus at the University of Illinois at Chicago and the University of Maryland.
In 1994 he proposed the Polyvagal Theory, a theory that links the evolution of the mammalian autonomic nervous system to social behavior and emphasizes the importance of physiological state in the expression of behavioral problems and psychiatric disorders.
Empathy Circle/Cafe facilitators support drop-in group. A weekly call to talk about; * Learning and deepening the Practice * Developing, Promoting, Improving the Practice * Tips * Experiences * Successes * Challenges, Problems * Case Studies * Designing Training Material * Connecting with Co-Facilitators and Coordinators * Feedback and Support on Projects * etc
Empathy Circle/Cafe facilitators support drop-in group. A weekly call to talk about; * Learning and deepening the Practice * Developing, Promoting, Improving the Practice * Tips * Experiences * Successes * Challenges, Problems * Case Studies * Designing Training Material * Connecting with Co-Facilitators and Coordinators * Feedback and Support on Projects * etc
Empathy Activists Circle #8: Facing the COVID-19 Pandemic with Empathy at Work and Home. An Empathy Circle with empathy activists, experts, book authors, etc. exploring different aspects of empathy.
Being empathetic at work means seeing the situation from another’s perspective, and using that vantage point to shape your leadership style, workplace culture, and branding strategy.
Heartificial Empathy looks at why and how brands should learn to flex their empathic muscle, as well as how to encode empathy in Artificial Intelligence.
The goal of The Empathy Effect is to inspire loving kindness in public and private life, at home, at school, at work and in the world. What are you waiting for? Join the Empathy Revolution.
Director: Center for Building a Culture of Empathy
The Center for Building a Culture of Empathy is a leader of the global empathy movement. Our mission is to build a movement for creating a global worldwide culture of empathy and care.
Though circumstances and challenges will differ from one individual to the next, right now, we can all relate in some capacity. When communicating with your clients, negate irrational and impulsive messaging in a bid to secure custom, and remain calm in tone of voice, regardless of the turmoil your business is facing.
Your audiences want to believe that your concern for them and for your own employees is authentic. This requires a new degree of transparency that many businesses are not used to, nor are comfortable with. Putting yourself in the shoes of your clients will help you deliver messaging that remains sensitive and helpful to build trust for the future.
How do we navigate our differences at work, at home, in politics and in society? In this enlightening, lightly humorous, and research-based talk, Dr. Jamil Zaki delivers an astonishing overview of empathy: how it really works, why it truly matters (especially to work places), why it’s on the decline, and how to build it back up through deliberate practice.
For anyone who works in HR, who leads teams, or is part of one, Zaki will redefine how you understand, empathize, and work with others—an issue companies have been debating forever. Zooming out, Zaki’s insights will help you revitalize your connection to your neighborhood, your community, the world at large. Empathic people are happier, more creative and productive, in all sorts of ways.
For some people, active listening and empathy can be a defense mechanism that harms rather than helps.
How?
Below is a diagram from Transactional Analysis. Just one simple model among many different ways to view how the self is split into many parts or ego states. I don't love the primacy given to "thinking" and "rationality" in this diagram and wish the word "thought' under the adult column were swapped out for "regulated" but the image still serves us. albeit, imperfect. (I also love Gestalt Theory, Internal Family Systems, Systems Theory, Jungian Analysis, Trauma and Sensorimotor Therapy, and Indigenous Concentric Systems Framework Theory who all have parts models).
Empath’s are always tired because they use more energy than other people do. Their energies are always being tapped into and some of the times, negative energies attach to them.
When you are an empath, you have strong and heavy emotions. These emotions come from people and areas around them. Even when you don’t mean to, when you are an empath, you pick it all up.
When you feel the emotions of other people, you are opening up your energy reservoir to them. You will take on other people’s energies to help them heal and when you do this, you will become tired and sick yourself.
A little empathy goes a long way Looking back, I believe that they thought that being quiet during meetings was an indication that I didn’t have the skills to do my job properly. Of course, now it’s widely acknowledged that introverts need a little more thinking time than their extroverted colleagues.
Back then, a bit of empathy and a few simple questions would have revealed my eagerness to do well, and coupled with some training might have gone a very long way to alleviate, or avoid altogether, the stress, embarrassment and fear that I experienced as result of the company’s actions. I discuss these work challenges in my TEDx talk.
Active listening – everyone has a natural need to be heard. This need we have coded from the beginning of our civilization when people gathered around the fire and listened to the stories of gods, old stories, battles, hunts and what they experienced. This is how storytelling was born. However, there is a huge difference between just listening to someone and listening to the person in depth. And this is active listening.
Nowadays, our employees often have a problem with being heard. And yet this need has not expired in us. Therefore, you can often meet with opinions and regrets about not being heard, about the fact that leaders are often absent during the conversation.
It is time for those of us who lead to do so with empathy. Our people need us to understand them, to feel with and for them, and yes, to appreciate them.
Promoting Empathy, Equity and Justice in Emerging Technologies: Lessons from Healthcare
This is in line with a broader discourse on empathetic healthcare and how critical it is to the therapeutic process. In fact, a recent systematic review of literature found empathy to be a fundamental, and often underappreciated, ingredient for success
in addressing the communication barriers between healthcare professionals and young people. Mainstreaming empathy within healthcare and technology could improve its accessibility to young people and other marginalized communities.
For example, narrative inquiry can be a pivotal approach to reduce surface misconceptions about marginalized healthcare users, and create a holistic healthcare experience tailored to populations otherwise vulnerable by design.
Furthermore, as there is concern of a growing “empathy gap” between healthcare systems and users, empathy-informed user design can be promoted as both an aim of AI-assisted services and an end-result of health-tech innovation.
The coronavirus pandemic has exposed a generational chasm between Baby Boomers and some young Americans, such as Millennials and Gen-Zers.
Correlation between age, empathy and social distancing
IUPUI survey of 322 American adults showing a correlation between higher age, higher empathy and higher social distancing. Participants rated questions on empathy and social distancing on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the highest. The scores were averaged for this chart.
* Become an Empathy Circle facilitator Empathy Circle Facilitators Online Support Group: Fridays https://www.facebook.com/events/812233425892036/ Empathy Circle/Cafe facilitators support drop-in group. A weekly call to talk about; * Learning and deepening the Practice * Developing, Promoting, Improving the Practice * Tips * Experiences * Successes * Challenges, Problems * Case Studies * Designing Training Material * Connecting with Co-Facilitators and Coordinators * Feedback and Support on Projects * etc
Empathy Circle/Cafe facilitators support drop-in group. A weekly call to talk about; * Learning and deepening the Practice * Developing, Promoting, Improving the Practice * Tips * Experiences * Successes * Challenges, Problems * Case Studies * Designing Training Material * Connecting with Co-Facilitators and Coordinators * Feedback and Support on Projects * etc
What are we learning about leadership in crisis? A lot.
As I discussed in The Big Reset, I think there are five lessons to learn here.
First, leaders in a crisis focus on “empathy and compassion first, business second.” If you believe, as I do, in the unlimited potential of the human spirit, you understand that only by making people safe will we ever grow out of this crisis. Giving people money will help, but jawboning the stock market won’t matter. When people feel a sense of safety, trust and empowerment, growth will return.
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