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What Your Mama Never Told You. Tips for Concious Connection.
Curated by PAT NOVAK
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Decoding Male Behavior: Why Do Men Lie?

Decoding Male Behavior: Why Do Men Lie? | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
It’s time to have a frank discussion about lying and deceit. I see a lot of fears floating around in the the dating world and it can be disheartening.


Whenever a relationship goes sour (or fails to launch), it’s almost always caused by some tiny fear, doubt, worry or insecurity that grows and festers until you feel overwhelmed by the whole ordeal.


Read more: Decoding Male Behavior: Why Do Men Lie? http://bit.ly/wYSV6i

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Valentine’s, Love and 2012

Valentine’s, Love and 2012 | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
This Valentine’s Day we will have Mars, the planet of passion, sexual desire, and initiative will be retrograde. What does that mean for you?


2012 is about being aware of what you’re perpetuating in your life. Once you get down and dirty with your answers, clarity and the person of your dreams, will emerge.


Source: OM Times Magazine (http://s.tt/15CLj)

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Are You Wired for Romance?

Are You Wired for Romance? | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
This neuropsychologist says yes!...


The Big Enemy is autopilot. The mind is a wonderful thing. But when it goes on autopilot, we’re its captive.


If you’ve ever heard words come out of your mouth that you knew were not from your heart, your deepest, best part of yourself; if you’ve ever been in an argument with your partner, where you knew that the worst of you was interacting with the worst of them – getting out of the habit of autopilot is for you.


Mindfulness meditation rewires your brain so that your autopilot isn’t running – and ruining – your relationship.


Read more: Are You Wired for Romance? - Marsha Lucas, Ph.D. - Heal Your Life http://bit.ly/A2H88H

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Valentine's Day Challenge: 14 Gestures of Love

Valentine's Day Challenge: 14 Gestures of Love | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Most of us are disenchanted with the idea of Valentine's Day and its manufactured romance. Love doesn't care if you're in a romantic relationship or not. It wants to BE experienced and expressed on all levels and for every thing.


The Challenge:


Don’t let another day pass, February or not, before you open your heart. I’m challenging you to commit to 14 gestures of love over the next 14 days; simple gestures that pack a lot of love with a minimal amount of effort.


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/how-to-redefine-love-this-valentines-day-14-gestures-of-love.html#ixzz1lrak2EMG

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Don't Put Anyone Out Of Your Heart

Don't Put Anyone Out Of Your Heart | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Loving Kindness asks that we stay caring, that we keep our heart open and hold ourselves with gentle tenderness. Then amazing change is possible.


We know this sounds so easy: just be kind and loving, how great, what a cool idea. But in practice it’s not always so simple, such as when someone says or does something that is personally critical, derogatory or hurtful. Can metta still flow when the ego-mind is upset?


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/dont-put-anyone-out-of-your-heart.html#ixzz1lrZ8nH1p

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30 Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You Out …

30 Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You Out … | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it

If you wonder wether there are Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You Out, the answer is, yeah!  In fact, there are quite a few effective ones!  So if you like this guy, call it a crush, butterflies in your stomach or love at first sight, you can easily get HIM to like YOU enough to ask you out!


Read more: 30 Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You Out … http://bit.ly/xwqEBE

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Many singles looking for love, but not marriage

Many singles looking for love, but not marriage | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Many are looking for love (and sex), a broad national study shows. But marriage? They're not entirely sure.


"It is true that researchers used to find that people who hadn't gotten married still had aspirations to get married, but I think that may be eroding now. A new generation has grown up in a world where marriage is not a certainty."


Read more: Match.com survey gives a snapshot of singles in America - USATODAY.com http://usat.ly/AlQCrH

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When It Comes to Reading, We're Not on the Same Page

When It Comes to Reading, We're Not on the Same Page | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it


Everybody comes into a relationship with their own slate of cultural references and preferences... 


When you marry, those points of reference often align. Together you see movies, take vacations, try restaurants.


But even in marriage, reading remains, more often than not, a solitary pursuit. 


See how this just might, help you know your partner a little better, and feel a little closer. - Pat Novak


Read more: When Spouses Aren't on the Same Page With Books - WSJ.com http://on.wsj.com/zuzBIV



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Are You Substituting Food for Sex?

Are You Substituting Food for Sex? | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
For millions of Americans we have lost our way on our search for sexual satisfaction somewhere in a big box of chocolate. Food has become a stand in for sex for countless people.


The goal is for a chocolate chip cookie to be just a chocolate chip cookie, to be enjoyed for the cookie’s sake. Not as a replacement drug to help you forget your sexual loneliness, or a poor stand in for sexual pleasure or our repressed sexual desires.


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/are-you-substituting-food-for-sex.html#ixzz1kq6pBL25

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Guy Friend: The Other Kind of Boyfriend

Guy Friend: The Other Kind of Boyfriend | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it

The Case for Male Bonding


Despite the obstacles, experts agree there are specific boons that only male friendships can bring to your life. Getting a male point of view tops the list.


"Gaining an insider's perspective on how men think, feel, and behave is one of the advantages of an adult female-male friendship," says Michael Monsour, Ph.D., author of Women and Men as Friends.


Read more: Guy Friend: The Other Kind of Boyfriend | Women's Health Magazine http://bit.ly/ynrAeA

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Stephanie Quandt's curator insight, January 2, 2015 7:05 PM

There are many good reasons for women to gain males as friends. Women get a guy's "insider" perspective, there's usually less judgement passed which can be liberating (women can be extremely judgmental of each other), there's less comparing yourself to your male friend if you're female (less rivalry), and it's often a more drama-free relationship, causing requiring less maintenance.

Karene Crumb's curator insight, January 4, 2015 4:22 PM

"Relationships gain identity from how outsiders define them, so it's equally crucial to confirm to everyone else that you're just friends." That quote says it all! I believe that it's only natural to have relations with males, no offense, but sometimes, other girls can get annoying, especially when they seek advice about their problems, "yeah, it's not like we don't have a home and a job and issues to vent"...We can't live with them and we can't live without them, that's how i see it.

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Sex on the Brain Proves Costly for Men

Sex on the Brain Proves Costly for Men | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
New research suggests the mere idea of an encounter with a woman can impair men’s cognitive performance.


Ladies: Do you have any idea how much power you have over us men? To quote the classic song, it seems the very thought of you is enough to dull our brains.


Read more: Sex on the Brain Proves Costly for Men - Miller-McCune http://bit.ly/wK1rzV

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"Can you die of a broken heart?"

"Can you die of a broken heart?" | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
When a long-time spouse dies, it isn't that uncommon for potentially life-threatening health problems to arise in his or her partner soon afterward, or for chronic conditions to take a grave turn. Could broken hearts be to blame?


Broken heart syndrome is just one rare example of how heartache can affect our health. Even in minor doses, the sting of rejection and loss doesn't reside solely in the mind but literally travels throughout the body.


Read more: HowStuffWorks "Can you die of a broken heart?" http://bit.ly/x37YMF


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Dance Like Zorba the Greek: Getting in Touch with Your Wild Man

Dance Like Zorba the Greek: Getting in Touch with Your Wild Man | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
We talk a lot about gentlemanly behavior and comportment on The Art of Manliness. I think it’s a trait we can all use more of and our culture finds in short supply.


But I don’t think we should pursue manners and self-discipline to the detriment of our Wild Man.


The Wild Man is the opposite of the pony-tailed New Age guy who only cultivates his nurturing or feminine side. The Wild Man has a fierceness that he’ll use to fight for what he thinks is right. The Wild Man isn’t afraid to shout what he wants and mean it. In short, the Wild Man isn’t afraid or ashamed of being a man.


Read more: Zorba the Greek Dance and How it Relates to Manliness | The Art of Manliness http://bit.ly/xGyQIN

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The Health Benefits of Love: A Meditation for Deepening Connections

The Health Benefits of Love: A Meditation for Deepening Connections | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
What's love got to do with it? If you're referring to health and well-being, then just about everything, according to the latest research.


"What we do inside relationships matter more than any other aspect of human life."


So what exactly is love? Is it attachment/intimacy needs, an evolutionary drive to prolong the species, our soul's longing for meaning, hormones gone wild?


Read more: Leslie Davenport: The Health Benefits of Love: A Meditation for Deepening Connections http://huff.to/wdYMyb



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When the Soul is Ready, the Soulmate Will Appear

When the Soul is Ready, the Soulmate Will Appear | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Become the person you aspire to be and then the soulmate will appear during that journey of personal transformation.


Your soulmate is not someone you can seek. Your soulmate is not someone who will seek you.


Only by stopping the search, focusing on yourself and working on yourself will your soulmate materialize.


Read more: OM Times Magazine (http://s.tt/15xgc)

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8 Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out for …

8 Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out for … | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Relationship Red Flags aren't always easy to spot. In fact, when they say that 'love is blind', it really is sometimes. You might not want to admit that the relationship you're in isn't all that great.


No. 4 is Deep-Seated Anger.


(not "Deep-Seeded" as it is written in the article) 


So let's start there:


This is a guy who makes big things out of small things. You'll look at him like, "What did I do?".  Half the time you'll feel like you're walking on eggshells. This guy has unresolved emotional injuries he has not dealt with. The way he will deal with them, is taking it out on you! You are not his therapist. Don't put yourself in that role and try to save him. Get out of there. - Pat Novak


Read more: 8 Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out for … http://bit.ly/Az1jC7

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How Valentine's Day Can Ruin Your Relationship

How Valentine's Day Can Ruin Your Relationship | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
The commercialization of Valentine’s Day has given rise to great expectations and just as often great disappointments if the gift giving is not enough to meet our romantic fantasy.


It is not that gift giving is bad or that we should not give them but if we are making a connection between the size and cost of the gift with the quality of our love, we are creating an expectation that can cause a deep emotional rift in what may be an otherwise healthy relationship.


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/how-valentines-day-can-ruin-your-relationship.html#ixzz1lrZZEmf8

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The Stiff Upper Lip: A Man’s Condition and A Woman’s Burden

The Stiff Upper Lip: A Man’s Condition and A Woman’s Burden | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
So many women, even those in “healthy” relationships, are forced to walk on egg shells around certain issues.


There is no doubt that we encourage men to keep a stiff upper lip when it comes to dealing with their vulnerability and emotions.


In keeping silent about their struggles and emotions, are they also demanding their women partners to do the same?


Read more: http://thecurrentconscience.com/blog/2012/02/06/the-stiff-upper-lip/

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Love Addiction: It's For Real

Love Addiction: It's For Real | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
There is almost no distinction between withdrawal from heroin and withdrawal from love. They differ mainly in the soundtrack -- junkies don't play so much Adele.


Perhaps you've found yourself in this position, curled up on the couch in a fetal position, hugging your knees and staring at the phone. Waiting for him to call...


You weep at random intervals.


It sounds like depression, but it's not. In fact, it feels closer to a nicotine fit than it does to the blues. These are the symptoms of drug withdrawal -- withdrawal from a powerful drug called love.


Read more:Ethlie Ann Vare: Love Addiction: It's For Real http://huff.to/wpxFVE



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What New Girl Says About the New Recession-Era Man

What New Girl Says About the New Recession-Era Man | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
The feminized dudes of New Girl fit perfectly into the economic zeitgeist.


The show New Girl, suggests it’s not only women of the 21st century who are changing, but straight men, too: in a recession-era America, they’re learning to be, or have already become, more like women.


Read more: What New Girl Says About the New Recession-Era Man - Culture - GOOD http://bit.ly/wQr7if

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6 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman

6 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Women -- they are everywhere. From our mothers, sisters and daughters to gal pals and love interests, there’s no escaping them.


You may love them, can’t live without them, but ever feel like you are walking on eggshells around the leading ladies in your life?


Really?  All you need to understand is a woman doesn't feel loved, heard or honored if you do not acknowledge her feelings. -Pat Novak


Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/6-things-you-should-never-say-to-a-woman.html#ixzz1ksHgD8Sj

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This Is Why We Date Who We Are!

This Is Why We Date Who We Are! | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
We date at the level of our self-esteem. Your relationship is a direct reflection of your own self-love and self-worth.


The common question seems to be: “How can I change myself so this will work”, and the response is “Don’t change yourself – BE YOURSELF”.


Many Seekers are terrified of being alone and of the unknown. And I understand, it can be hellishly uncomfortable in there. But if your needs aren’t being met in a relationship, it’s not the other persons fault. The responsibility is on you to communicate your needs and to choose someone who honors you, cherishes you and loves you.


Read more: This Is Why We Date Who We Are! http://bit.ly/xKwtpl

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How to Deal with Men Crying

How to Deal with Men Crying | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
Our sex and dating columnist on when it's OK to let the tears fall, and why a generation of men are finding it easier than ever...


Many of us have been taught not to show emotion outside of the deaths of family members, catastrophic injury, or, OK, really terrible breakups.


And I definitely think there are instances in which crying is inappropriate for both genders. At work, in a crowded coffee shop, or a water park—sure, it's good camouflage, but come on, the rest of us are there to have fun.


Read More http://www.gq.com/news-politics/mens-lives/201201/men-emotions-crying#ixzz1kWCVAdbF

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Relationship Survival Destination: Loneliness

Relationship Survival Destination: Loneliness | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
In relationships (and the clue is in the word!), relating through words and body language is our only means of staying connected to our tribe, community and indeed those close to us. We have to be able to relate to belong and feel felt by others.


The problem, particularly in our love relationships, is that many of us in our delicate inner world fear loss of love from our honey so we constantly patrol the boundary around our heart with behaviors that don’t feel good to us or others, when we are upset, in the name of protection.


Source: OM Times Magazine (http://s.tt/159Ke)
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Exit Left, Wordlessly — Modern Love

Exit Left, Wordlessly — Modern Love | SEX | DATING | RELATIONSHIPS | Scoop.it
A STORY that haunts me involves a woman I know whose fiancé went out to inspect a potential apartment for their married life and never came back. He wasn’t dead in a ditch. He was just gone, without clarification.


Romantic finale came without explanation for me, too.


Read more:Exit Left, Wordlessly — Modern Love - NYTimes.com http://nyti.ms/wmks9z

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