Sex Positive
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Sex Positive
Sexuality as a human right.
Curated by Deanna Dahlsad
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Why (Some) Women Love Strap-Ons

Why (Some) Women Love Strap-Ons | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

Life is more free now. But we’re also being forced to ask ourselves some serious questions. Like, ‘Does shaving my armpits make me a bad feminist?’ And, more pressingly, ‘Is my strap-on a symbol of male supremacy?’ And if so, should I set it on fire as a performance art piece?”

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Movember Is More About Protecting Masculinity Than Protecting Men

Movember Is More About Protecting Masculinity Than Protecting Men | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Remember, remember, the scourge of Movember? We’re halfway through the advocacy month that calls for men to grow the manliest mustaches they can muster to
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

"As November babies and gender critics, we take Movember as a personal affront.


There’s a school of thought that says any act in service of a good cause is a good act. So why do we hate Movember? Are we grumpy contrarians and feminist killjoys who hate things precisely because other people love them? Probably, but there are deeper reasons for our Movember naysaying, too. Below, we investigate in conversation."

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Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, November 17, 2015 6:32 PM

"As November babies and gender critics, we take Movember as a personal affront.


There’s a school of thought that says any act in service of a good cause is a good act. So why do we hate Movember? Are we grumpy contrarians and feminist killjoys who hate things precisely because other people love them? Probably, but there are deeper reasons for our Movember naysaying, too. Below, we investigate in conversation."

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On Laverne Cox’s Nude Photo Spread & Meghan Murphy’s Transphobia

On Laverne Cox’s Nude Photo Spread & Meghan Murphy’s Transphobia | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Laverne Cox graced Allure’s annual “Nudes” issue with a picture that is so honest in its emotion and raw in its beauty I damn near cried looking at it. She admits her insecurities and ultimately decided to shrug them off and have the mac ‘n’ cheese she was craving the night before the shoot. That’s some role model shit right there. Unless you’re Feminist Current founder Meghan Murphy, who says to her neighbors south of the border (she’s Canadian): “What the fuck are you trying to sell us, America?” She mocks Cox’s insecurities and the idea of “radical self-acceptance” by gasping at her ability to indulge in comfort food and still love herself. Murphy telling Cox to put her clothes back on because she’s uncomfortable around the flawlessness that is Cox’s naked form isn’t an expression of her disdain for catering to the “male gaze.” Murphy is scolding a grown woman who made a choice for herself because: “Seeing a black transgender woman embracing and loving everything about herself might
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You Give Men A Bad Name

You Give Men A Bad Name | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
We talk about pubic hair from time to time here at SK, but I think the best discussion of the subject just might be this one where Dr. Debby Herbenick (Ph.D., M.P.H.) responds to a male who not onl...
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

Read for the sex ed & body image info; mock for the stupid male actions.

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Is The Clothed Female Naked Male Fetish Feminist?

Is The Clothed Female Naked Male Fetish Feminist? | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

Ever visited PornHub and spotted an incongruous image of a naked man surrounded by clothed women? Then you've stumbled upon the fetish of CFNM – Clothed Female, Naked Male.


Via Craftypants Carol
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Exclusive Kaylee Pond Interview Part Four: What Women Want To Know About Being A CamGirl

Exclusive Kaylee Pond Interview Part Four: What Women Want To Know About Being A CamGirl | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
We've been talking with the lovely 26 year-old webcam model, and self proclaimed geek, Kaylee Pond. In this last part (yes, I know; it's sad to see it end!), Kaylee answers some more personal quest...

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Sex Trouble: Radical Feminism and the Long Shadow of the 'Lavender Menace'

Sex Trouble: Radical Feminism and the Long Shadow of the 'Lavender Menace' | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
"The supersensitivity of the [Women's Liberation] movement to the lesbian issue, and the existence of a few militant lesbians within the movement, once prompted [NOW founder Betty] Friedan herself ...
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The fight over the “v” word

The fight over the “v” word | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
A debate over a word reveals feminism's complicated relationship to trans rights
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Is This Dildo-Licking, Dominatrix-Loving Vogue Blogger the New Face of Feminism?

Is This Dildo-Licking, Dominatrix-Loving Vogue Blogger the New Face of Feminism? | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Karley Sciortino has parlayed her raunchy, witty blog into a Vice video series and a Vogue column, one that raises all sorts of questions about feminism’s modern-day tightrope act.

Via Gracie Passette
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

A must read.

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Laura Brown's comment, May 26, 2014 3:19 PM
I think stereotypes have been getting exposed long enough. Ripping band aids off isn't enough. You, Gracie and I have seen all these same stereotypes for more than 30 years. Problems are exposed but the laws don't change. It's 2014 and a male politician is still talking about "legitimate rape". He understands it is rape but because the laws are so mushy he can't see it as a real problem.
Laura Brown's comment, May 26, 2014 3:20 PM
We should make this a debate post, or something.
Deanna Dahlsad's comment, May 26, 2014 4:10 PM
You'd have to read the whole thing then, @Laura Brown :P
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Is Being a Porn Star Feminist?

Is Being a Porn Star Feminist? | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Porn stars aren't typically labeled as feminists or women’s studies majors, but Belle Knox, a Duke freshman who made headlines recently after she was outed by her classmate, is both. Whatever you make of Knox, her story offers a lot to think about.

Via Gracie Passette, Deanna Dahlsad
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Bros, This Is How Your Slut-Shaming Is Backfiring. A Sex Researcher Explains

Bros, This Is How Your Slut-Shaming Is Backfiring. A Sex Researcher Explains | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

When a Duke frat boy recognized a classmate in the porn clip he was watching, the gossip was just too good. He spread the news among some other bros on campus, and the rumor soon traveled from Duke's campus to the blogosphere (including Playboy SFW).


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Gracie Passette's curator insight, April 22, 2014 7:15 AM

"Somehow, however, the frat boy's decision to violate Knox's privacy by outing her went mostly unquestioned." *snort*

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Of Feminism & Inequality In Porn & Sex Work

Of Feminism & Inequality In Porn & Sex Work | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

The Feminist Times has an excellent series on sex work, covering a diverse range of issues. (Sadly, it is only found by searching for the hashtag #SexIndustryWeek, as if finding it on Twitter was more important than a person being able to find all the discussion on the site.) Because it is a diverse series, there are plenty of articles I do not agree with; but that’s what makes it a good discussion, so, please, do take the time to read them. However, there’s one article in particular that raised my hackles and prompts me to write today ~ primarily because it has gone without comment. Such absence of comment might make people think it is “right”. And it is not.

The article is #SexIndustryWeek: Dworkin Was Right About Porn, by VJD Smith of Glosswatch. In it, Smith uses the words of Andrea Dworkin to align all porn as patriarchal misogyny abusing and raping female victims:


Via Gracie Passette
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

Some of the assumptions feminists make about sex work and porn; insightful.

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Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, April 9, 2014 10:28 PM

Negative aspects involved in feminist arguments against porn and sex work.

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Interview: How Feminism Exploits Sex Workers

Interview: How Feminism Exploits Sex Workers | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

This is the full text of the interview with feminist genderqueer sex worker @MxLaudanum, which was quoted in this article on the rescue industry I wrote for Cliterati (published 1/02/14). The interview itself makes a very powerful post in its own right. Written in just a couple of hours, it’s a stunning critique of contemporary feminism and how all of us on this planet tend to view the world in black and white.


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Dear Gloria Steinem, What About Handjobs & Sword Swallowers?

Dear Gloria Steinem, What About Handjobs & Sword Swallowers? | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
I deeply respect Gloria Steinem. But I am terribly disappointed by remarks she's made regarding sex work during her recent tour of India. This publicity tour promotes her latest book, The Essential...

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Gracie Passette's comment, February 5, 2014 2:19 AM
And here I was thinking Steinem might have grown & evolved her position on sex work after all these years...
malek's comment, February 5, 2014 7:42 AM
using non-offensive word or expression in place of one that may be found offensive or suggest something unpleasant.
Deanna Dahlsad's comment, February 5, 2014 5:19 PM
@malek, sex workers find the the word prostitution offensive -- and prostitution is the word Steinem is using.
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Southern Poverty Law Center: Monitor Gender Identity Watch as a Hate Group

Southern Poverty Law Center: Monitor Gender Identity Watch as a Hate Group | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

As a feminist organization, Secular Woman promotes gender equality. We stand against and combat sexism, hate, intolerance, and misogyny.


Transgender women are women.


Cisgender women are women. 


We do not, in any way, view the existence of transgender women, genderqueer individuals or transgender men as a threat to the safety of women, female identity, or the goals of feminism.


As intersectional feminists we acknowledge the privilege that cisgender people experience. We aim to dismantle the axis of oppression that this represents.


Unfortunately, not all who claim the label “feminist” agree with us.  They do not represent us and we reject their actions and views as unethical and devoid of reason.


We stand in opposition.


Members of our community have been targeted by trans-exclusionary radical feminists (TERFs). Personal information such as former names, current legal names, and photographs have been compiled and displayed on the website “Name the Problem”.  Several of the entries are self-attributed to “Pegasus” ("PegasusBug" is a pseudonym of Cathy Brennan, the head of Gender Identity Watch). This information was presented alongside reports describing rapists and batterers of women.


Countless others, including members of transgender advocacy groups have reported similar treatment, as well as other alarming behavior, such as Cathy Brennan contacting employers, schools and medical doctors of transgender women, girls and young men.


This is unacceptable.

Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

Sign the petition

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Ethical sluts and “dirty whores”: Straight talk about sex work

Ethical sluts and “dirty whores”: Straight talk about sex work | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

Has sex-positive feminism, despite its victories, forgotten that sex work is actually work, and often quite brutal?

 

...Despite the acceptance of “sluts,” the “prostitute” remains a deeply embedded symbolic marker between decency and disrespect. The “ethical slut” engages in sex of her or his own “free” will, while the “dirty whore” insists on getting paid for sex. Sex-positive feminists and other “sluts” believe there is nothing morally wrong with consensual sex between two (or more) people in private, or for adults, in a semi-public setting such as a sex club, dungeon or swingers’ retreat. But money changes everything.


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Not All Lefty Man-Hating Feminists Enjoy Porn; Minds Of Conservatives Blown | Sex~Kitten.net

Not All Lefty Man-Hating Feminists Enjoy Porn; Minds Of Conservatives Blown | Sex~Kitten.net | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

I really wish the conservatives out there, especially those who are anti-feminist, would get their facts straight; to-whit, feminists are not celebrating “infamous college campus hook-up culture” ~ and especially not at the price of bad or even mediocre sex. Most feminists are, however, sex positive.


Via Gracie Passette
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

NWS subject, of course.

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Gracie Passette's curator insight, December 2, 2013 10:12 PM

Educating folks on what is (and isn't) sex positive and feminist ~ along with some other sex ed basics.

Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, December 3, 2013 7:52 PM

NWS, obviously ;)

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Casual Sex Feminists?

Casual Sex Feminists? | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Seeing that this article, Mediocre Sex – The Price Women Pay For Freedom? by Jennifer Kabbany, was published at right-wing college site The Collage Fix, I should have resisted and not given it a cl...
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Gracie Passette's curator insight, November 24, 2013 10:13 PM

So much to think about, no wonder small-minded conservatives get it wrong.

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Tullia d’Aragona

Tullia d’Aragona | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

The existence of courtesans is a glaring refutation of neofeminist dogma about objectification, the eternal victimhood of whores, etc; the fact that the most celebrated, successful and highly-paid harlots of all time were often those who were educated and could match or surpass men in intellectual pursuits throws a huge spanner into the catechism that prostitution is a manifestation of male dominance over women, that our clients hate us, and so on.  Whenever possible, neofeminist historians deny that courtesans were prostitutes, pretend that accomplished women were not really courtesans, or describe them with circumlocutions like, “she chose to cohabit with several men who supported her financially.”  And when all else fails, they simply ignore them.  Fortunately neither male historians nor female ones with less parochial views feel the need to dissemble about such women, and among them Tullia d’Aragona is rightfully viewed as worthy of respect and study.


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The MPAA’s backwards logic: Sex is dangerous, sexism is fine

The MPAA’s backwards logic: Sex is dangerous, sexism is fine | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
If only the ratings agency looked as closely at gender bias as it does at consensual sex, it might do some good

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Activist Spotlight: Deon Haywood on Justice and the Movement in New Orleans

Activist Spotlight: Deon Haywood on Justice and the Movement in New Orleans | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

In May of this year, I talked to Deon Haywood, Executive Director of Women With A Vision in New Orleans about her approach to organizing. WWAV scored a significant grassroots legal and political victory in the last year with the NO Justice campaign, which removed hundreds of cis and trans women from Louisiana’s registered felony sexual offender rolls. Deon is a longtime activist in the city of New Orleans, with a history of organizing low-income women of color around reproductive justice, harm reduction, and human rights.

 

...We are not all in the same boat. And if we keep playing like we are, we’re not really going to make the kind of change we’d like to see. Because the women I work with are never going to be able to jump into the sex workers’ rights movement. They don’t feel like that movement is for them.


Via Gracie Passette, Deanna Dahlsad
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Of Femdoms & Feminists: Part Two Of The Vintage Smut Writer Interview With Irv O. Neil

Of Femdoms & Feminists: Part Two Of The Vintage Smut Writer Interview With Irv O. Neil | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

You mentioned having a feminist girlfriend which made porn a no-no. Most of us know the history of feminism and pornography — which most people prefer to describe in terms of “feminists say porn bad”. There were actually various distinctions (between porn and erotica, and between feminist thinkers as well), but in your case, you had a feminist girlfriend who actually said porn was a no-no?


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Romance and pornography : Popular Romance Project

Romance and pornography : Popular Romance Project | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

I teach an undergraduate seminar on “Gender, Sexuality, and Popular Culture” with a unit on the romance genre. This year, for the first time ever, the class consists entirely of women. Also new this year is an exercise we invented of an online, collaborative romance narrative. One question that came up in our writing experiment was how, when, and why to include sex scenes. We talked a lot about depictions of sexuality in romance fiction, as well as in the sex-saturated corridors of popular culture. How are the love scenes in romance different from those in pornography or erotica?

 

...I’m interested in the notion that a feminist is a woman who writes—a woman who dares explore ideas and fantasies that run contrary to patriarchal scripts for feminine docility, submissiveness, and sexual passivity. These scripts are still alive in the impossible contradictions and double standards my students report: be sexy but also pure, demands the culture. If guys sleep around it’s a sign of mastery and control, but if you do it you’re a slut.

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Anti-Choicers Get Real About Their Loathing of Female Sexuality

Anti-Choicers Get Real About Their Loathing of Female Sexuality | Sex Positive | Scoop.it

by AMANDA MARCOTTE, RH Reality Check

 

Anti-choicers aren’t even trying to sound reasonable anymore. Since the seventies, the anti-choice movement has gone to great lengths to try to spin their fear and loathing of female sexuality as anything but what it is. Obviously, the most popular gambit has been to claim to have concern for fetal life, but there have been other popular variations: Pretending to have public health motivations for removing evidence-based information from sex education, pretending to believe condoms don’t work, pretending to be concerned about women’s mental health if they exert control over their own bodies. While these derailing tactics are sadly not going anywhere soon, it does seem lately like there’s an uptick in anti-choicers just straight up admitting that they don’t think women should be having sex for any other reason but procreation.

 

This past week have been a veritable buffet of incidents that demonstrate that anti-choicers simply have a problem with female sexuality and that everything else is noise.

Example #1: Only virgins have a right to control their own bodies.

Example #2: Always be ovulating.

Example #3: The female orgasm is unholy, unholy I tell you!

 

[Get the details of each by clicking the headline!]


Via J'nene Solidarity Kay, Deanna Dahlsad
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Laura Brown's comment, February 27, 2013 1:26 PM
Ask them about the female menstruation. If the orgasm in unholy I bet they just love the monthly blood letting.
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If You Only Watch One Video Today – Or In Your Lifetime

If You Only Watch One Video Today – Or In Your Lifetime | Sex Positive | Scoop.it
Let it be this one. This Is My Body makes me weep — with joy, sorrow, hope, and fear. If you like, Like.

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Curated by Deanna Dahlsad
An opinionated woman obsessed with objects, entertained by ephemera, intrigued by researching, fascinated by culture & addicted to writing. The wind says my name; doesn't put an @ in front of it, so maybe you don't notice. http://www.kitsch-slapped.com
Other Topics
A Marketing Mix
Adventures in advertising and marketing - the contemporary, the historical, and the hysterical. http://deanna.dahlsad.com/
Antiques & Vintage Collectibles
Collecting old things; heirlooms and new to you things! Companion to http://www.inherited-values.com/
Colorful Prism Of Racism
Racism past and present. Companion to http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/category/colorful-prism-of-racism/
Consumption Junction
Consumerism meets marketing; who & what manipulates the free market of goods & services. See also: http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/category/ze-big-mouth-promotions-stuff/
Crimes Against Humanity
From lone gunmen on hills to mass movements. Depressing as hell, really.
Cultural History
The roots of culture; history and pre-history.
Dare To Be A Feminist
I do. http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/category/hey-sister-can-you-spare-some-social-change/
For Art's Sake-1
Art, crafts, and the people who make them. To inspire and purchase. Companion to http://www.ululating-undulating-ungulate.com/
Herstory
History as this woman sees it. The serious, the kitsch, the opinionated. Companion to http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/
In The Name Of God
Mainly acts done in the name of religion, but also discussions of atheism, faith, & spirituality.
Kinsanity
Let's just say I have reasons to learn more about mental health, special needs children, psychology, and the like.
Kitsch
Mostly vintage and retro "badness" but you can decide how delicious it is. http://www.kitschy-kitschy-coo.com/blog/
Nerdy Needs
The stuff of nerdy, geeky, dreams.
Readin', 'Ritin', and (Publishing) 'Rithmetic
The meaning behind the math of the bottom line in publishing and the media. For writers, publishers, and bloggers (which are a combination of the two).
Sex Positive
Sexuality as a human right.
Vintage Living Today For A Future Tomorrow
It's as easy to romanticize the past as it is to demonize it; instead, let's learn from it. More than living simply, more than living 'green', thrifty grandmas knew the importance of the 'economics' in Home Economics. The history of home ec, lessons in thrift, practical tips and ideas from the past focused on sustainability for families and out planet. Companion to http://www.thingsyourgrandmotherknew.com/
Visiting The Past
Travel based on grande ideas, locations, and persons of the past.
Walking On Sunshine
Stuff that makes me smile.
You Call It Obsession & Obscure; I Call It Research & Important
Links to (many of) my columns and articles.