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What Makes Effective Communication

What Makes Effective Communication | positive thoughts | Scoop.it

Let me begin by dispelling a common myth: just because you can talk, doesn’t mean you can communicate well.

So what does it mean to communicate well?

What’s the difference between talking and powerful communication?

You may be surprised.

But before I get into what effective communication comprises, let’s look at a few scenarios.

You’re great at making small talk and cocktail conversation – but no matter how many networking meetings you attend, people don’t end up calling you.
You can put together a catchy opening, but whenever you give a presentation, you see people yawning, nodding off, or texting about halfway through, and you know your message isn’t being well received.
You know you’re good at what you do, but for some reason you can’t seem to get to the next rung on the career ladder, and you wonder why.
Whenever you’re put on the spot, whether it’s during a meeting at work, an argument or debate with your spouse, or a project with co-workers, you feel tongue-tied – and nobody understands what you’re trying to say.

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Willpower

Willpower | positive thoughts | Scoop.it

1. Willpower and self-discipline are critical life skills. Many tests show that people with self-discipline achieve more than those who don’t have it.

 

2. Willpower is part-nature and part-nurture. Some people are born with a strong will, some people train themselves to live a disciplined life.

 

3. . Use your willpower intelligently. If you have a big challenge ahead of you, don’t try to accomplish it too quickly. Take it on in incremental steps.

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8 Friends Who Are Bad for Your Finances

8 Friends Who Are Bad for Your Finances | positive thoughts | Scoop.it
These eight types of friends can be extremely detrimental to your finances and your emotional wellbeing. See if any of your friends match these profiles!

The Enabler

She can (and will) cajole you into buying that expensive dress you don't really need. Or the face cream that breaks the bank. While totally supportive—“that looks so good on you, you have to get it”—this friend can also threaten your ability to pay the rent.

 

How She Can Hurt You: You’ll often walk away in stun mode, not even realizing how much you money you just dropped until a look at your bank balance jolts you back to reality. Fun, and frequently a hedonist, the Enabler makes a great shopping friend—as long as you have the cash to burn.

How to Neutralize Her: While you’ll never change her ways, you can be prepared for her antics. When out with her, only bring as much cash as you’re willing to spend, so you don't wind up with "amazing" stilettos you only wear once.

 The One-Upper

Competitive and insecure, she’s the type who never fails to mention how much the guy she's dating makes. Or how much the amazing apartment she just bought cost. And she just loves to namedrop that private school her kids go to.

How She Can Hurt You: Besides making your money comparisonitis flare up each time you see her, the one-upper can inspire competitive spending. You might feel pressure to drop more cash if you’re with her (even if you know you shouldn’t), or buy your kid something you ordinarily wouldn’t just to keep up.

How to Neutralize Her: The One-Upper’s primary aim is attention. You can ignore her brags, which she’ll find maddening, or validate her (“Your new convertible is amazing.”). If it’s a good friend with an annoying habit, level with her and explain that all this talk about money is making you feel bad. (Here are other ways to cure a bad case of money comparisonitis.)

 

The Pryer

She wants to know how much you pay in rent, how much you have in the bank, what your annual salary is—and how much that raise was that you just got. And that’s just over breakfast.

How She Can Hurt You: The Pryer loves to pump you for info you’d usually only share with your financial planner. She’s likely not asking out of concern for your well-being, so anything you tell her can and may well be used against you. Be particularly wary if the Pryer in your life is a colleague or a relative.

How to Neutralize Her: Whether she’s a born gossip or suffering from a bad case of comparisonitis, the fact remains: This just isn’t her business. You can deflect her questions politely with a, “Rent? Well, I definitely pay more than I did last year,” or confront her more directly: “Would you like to know my net worth, too?”

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Lovely snowball light! IKEA Hackers:

Lovely snowball light! IKEA Hackers: | positive thoughts | Scoop.it

Materials: Ikea paper lantern (Regolit)

Description: I stole this idea from somewhere (can't remember where) so I won't take credit for it!

I had however bought the coffee filters months prior, knowing I would find some crafty use for them eventually. So you could say I willed this into existence. Right?

Anyway, this is easy as pie and cheap too.

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What is a tax haven?

What is a tax haven? | positive thoughts | Scoop.it

These so-called “tax havens” are popular for the super rich - but are they practical for the average Joe? As it turns out, normal people and businesses keep money in offshore accounts, too.

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How to Increase the Love in Your Life - Brene Brown - Oprah.com

How to Increase the Love in Your Life - Brene Brown - Oprah.com | positive thoughts | Scoop.it

Everybody in the world says that you need to work less in order to live a fuller, more connected life. But so few of us address what prevents us from doing it. The reasons are simple: (1) exhaustion is a status symbol in our culture, and (2) self-worth has become net worth. We live doing so much and with so little time that anything unrelated to the to-do list—taking a nap, say, or reading a novel—actually creates stress.

Wholehearted people, on the other hand, know when to stop and rest. Personally, I had to learn this. I'm still learning this. I screw it up every now and then, but five years ago I made some huge changes in my personal and private life. I went from full time to part time at the university, and my husband, who is a pediatrician, cut his hours to four days a week. As it stands now, we never get less than eight hours of sleep.

What did this require? A constellation of choices. For example, one of the things I have to do to cultivate more rest is to say no. Last year, I turned down 85 percent of the invitations I got to speak. Because I have a commitment to be at the family table four nights a week.

To say no, we have to understand why we're saying yes. One of the reasons is scarcity. I, like many of us, was so afraid that maybe all these opportunities would just go away, that maybe next year people wouldn't ask for me to come speak, and maybe my work wouldn't get the attention it needed, and that if I didn't have my work, who would I be? So I thought I had to say yes, yes, yes. The only reason I can now say no is because I work on my shame "gremlins." Gremlins are the tricksters who whisper all of those terrible things in our ears that keep us afraid and small. When the gremlins say "you better say yes, or they won't like you" or "they'll think you're lazy," I whisper back: "Not this time. I get to say no. I get to love myself, stay home and drive soccer carpool."

Read more: http://www.oprah.com/relationships/How-to-Increase-the-Love-in-Your-Life-Brene-Brown#ixzz1oRpti7sV

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