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How to escape the Drama Triangle  through empathy

How to escape the Drama Triangle  through empathy | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
The corners of the Drama Triangle
The Drama Triangle is a concept that defines the three roles people typically take on in high-conflict situations. Contrary to its name, the triangle doesn’t have to involve three people; it simply follows how different personalities affect each other during a conflict:

    The Victim – When problems arise, the victim tends to look helplessly inward. They spin a small anxiety (like, say, not answering a boss’s email on the weekend) into an outsized disaster (“I’m definitely getting fired!”). Hello Drama Queen!


    The Rescuer – The rescuer is the classic enabler who swoops in to save the day. He or she can be relied upon to always a put out a fire or show up at the last minute. Well-meaning to a fault, this “fixer” behavior can lead to resentment and burnout. Reluctant Confronters by nature, rescuers don’t speak up even when wronged.


    The Persecutor – We all know the persecutor. The go-to strategies are often controlling, blaming, and criticizing. In arguments, he or she will put you down and try to shame you into forgiveness. The persecutor’s refrain? “It’s all your fault.”


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The History of the Color Blue: From Ancient Egypt to New Discoveries

The History of the Color Blue: From Ancient Egypt to New Discoveries | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
From the decorative "Egyptian blue" of the ancient world, to the precious ultramarine and prussian blue pigments used in some of the world’s greatest masterpieces, the color blue has a fascinating history spanning around 6,000 years. Here's a short guide to how this color evolved.
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Empathic AI: The Next Generation of Vehicles Will Understand Your Emotions 

Empathic AI: The Next Generation of Vehicles Will Understand Your Emotions  | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
Transportation will never be the same once our machines know how we feel. We are all entering a wholesale, global disruption of the way people move from one place to another. More than any other change in this sector, the one that is likely to have the biggest impact on human society is the rise of autonomous (ie. self-driving) vehicles.

 

By feeding this sensor data into AI systems, we can train them to know how we feel and how to respond appropriately. This kind of empathy can also be enhanced by giving AI its own artificial emotions, imbuing it with simulations of feelings.

Empathic technology will have no small effect on the mobility sector. How might an empathic vehicle look?

 

 BEN BLAND


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Free Speech, The Empathy Tent, &Constructive Dialogue,  by Lou Zweier, Dave Gottfried & Edwin RutschIe: a Jewish member  in dialogues with members of Identity Evropa, a white supremacist group.

Free Speech, The Empathy Tent, &Constructive Dialogue,  by Lou Zweier, Dave Gottfried & Edwin RutschIe: a Jewish member  in dialogues with members of Identity Evropa, a white supremacist group. | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

What is the meaning of "Free Speech" if people don't listen to each other? We hear from all sides and every quarter that there is a need for constructive dialogue on so many critical issues; for people who disagree to start listening to each other. We strongly agree, and we have been passionately pursuing creating space for such dialogues both face-to-face and online.

 

We also see that many are afraid to engage in dialogue on emotionally charged topics because of where things might lead. This is as true at public protests as it is in homes and community meetings. How do we think about and discuss these kinds of issues constructively? How might we do this without dehumanizing each other and scapegoating? How might we begin to hear each other and empathize even if we don't agree?....

 

"As an example, a Jewish member of our team participated in dialogue with members of Identity Evropa, a white supremacist group. When one of them asked "what is Nazism anyway"  the Jewish speaker responded "For me Nazism means that half my extended family was killed,...

 


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Former Skinhead Discusses Importance of Compassion to Charlottesville Community

Former Skinhead Discusses Importance of Compassion to Charlottesville Community | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

He says the key to breaking hate is to be compassionate toward people - even if you don't think they deserve it. He says compassion is what helped transform his life....

 

“If we're divided, they've won already,” says Bro. “So we've got to figure out how to pull together as a community.”

 

CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. (WVIR) - People in Charlottesville who were saddened and angered by the Ku Klux Klan and white nationalist rallies that happened last summer are hoping to bring community members together to break the hate. Organizers say this program, which took place on Saturday, February 3, at Mt. Zion First African Baptist Church, came together in a month after they reached out to a former skinhead who is now a peace advocate. The organizers hope it brings different perspectives together to combat the hate displayed in downtown Charlottesville last year. Organizers of the event, which was called Breaking Hate - Countering White Supremacy in our Community, are taking steps to prepare people in the community in case there's a repeat of last summer's events. “I hope it can bring the community of differing perspectives together, because I think there's been a lot of conflict among community members who are essentially on the same side,” says Tara Hodges, one of the organizers of Saturday’s event. Hodges thought it would be helpful to bring in Christian Picciolini because of his background as a former “alt-right” extremist. “I think that my story can provide some insight on how people get involved in these types of movements, what it's like in the movement, but also what it takes to reach somebody who's there to allow them to humanize people again,” says Picciolini, who now advocates for peace. He says the key to breaking hate is to be compassionate toward people - even if you don't think they deserve it. He says compassion is what helped transform his life. Picciolini says if people are silent, extremist activities are going to continue to happen. And if people react with violence, it will play into their narrative. “I hope to inspire the community that we can't be silent, and we can't be violent, we have to be vocal, and we have to be present,” says Picciolini. “But that can happen without using the same tactics that they use.” Susan Bro, Heather Heyer’s mother, is hoping the community will come together as a whole. “If we're divided, they've won already,” says Bro. “So we've got to figure out how to pull together as a community.” Picciolini says no one knows this community like the people who live here in Charlottesville. His goal for the day’s event was to have that awkward and difficult conversation in a civil way and teach people to have compassion for everyone.

by Lowell Rose

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Travelling 2,000 miles to cook for strangers

Travelling 2,000 miles to cook for strangers | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
Ghafoor Hussain travels 2,000 miles to cook dinner for migrants on the Greek island of Lesbos.

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Hong Kong's 'coffin homes' reveal a housing crisis

Hong Kong's 'coffin homes' reveal a housing crisis | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
A shortage of developable land have pushed Hong Kong's housing prices skyward, leading some to live in spaces the size of closets.

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Matt Manish's curator insight, February 16, 8:35 PM
The photo gallery in this article helps to give an accurate depiction of the housing crisis in Hong Kong with many people living in units that are 4 by 6 feet. Many families have to live in separate units because they are so small and can't usually fit more than one person. The bright side of the housing crisis in Hong Kong is that these "coffin homes" allow people to live in the major city at a cheaper cost, although it definitely comes with a hefty price with such tiny living quarters. The future looks positive though, as Hong Kong promises to build over 400,000 new homes over the next decade. This will help improve the housing crisis and hopefully phase these "coffin homes" out of existence once and for all.
Richard Aitchison's curator insight, March 29, 9:31 AM
Now this is a major housing crisis. I thought apartments in NYC were small, but nothing like this. In Hong Kong they have what is called "coffin homes" they are stacked on top of each other to try to fit as many in as possible. With increasing population and just 7% of the land properly zoned for housing it caused a major crunch in the housing market. Currently prices are going for $1,350 per square foot. Obviously this is a major problem and causes living conditions to be brutal especially for the elderly or for families that have to split up due to space. So what to do to fix this problem? Well one would say just make more land available for housing, well that comes with problems as well. There probably is a reason that there is limited land for housing due to geographical issues. So yes we can build more homes, but would we run into new problems such as natural disasters that cause more debt for the people in the country. There definitely needs to be a solution for these people, but it might not be so simple. I will never go back to NYC now and say how small the apartments are, because well you could be in Hong Kong.
Zavier Lineberger's curator insight, May 2, 9:17 PM
(East Asia) Unlike Singapore's regimented government housing, Hong Kong faces a severe housing crisis, forcing hundreds of thousands of people to live in tiny 4 by 6 foot homes. Hong Kong has a population of 7.3 million but only 7% of the city is cleared for housing. Therefore, landlords have to get creative. Stacking these "coffin homes" one on top of another is a great way to save space while providing the bare minimum housing. The coffin homes, little more than closets, have no windows or room to move around. Skyrocketing housing prices have caused extremely dense buildings as the elderly, disabled, young, and poor are forced to move in.
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English Words for Places To Live and Stay

English Words for Places To Live and Stay | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
English for Life in The UK - an illustrated vocabulary list with audio and simple definitions, to help adult ESOL students learn British English words for different kinds of places to live. Includes simple word definitions and follow-on activities to help consolidate learning. Suitable for use in the classroom, or self-study.

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Neuroscience Shows the Brain Literally Eats Itself Due to Lack of Sleep

Neuroscience Shows the Brain Literally Eats Itself Due to Lack of Sleep | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
New scientific research shows that lack of sleep may be more damaging to the brain than we’ve previously thought.
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Empathy Mapping: The First Step in Design Thinking

Empathy Mapping: The First Step in Design Thinking | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

Why Use Empathy Maps
Empathy maps should be used throughout any UX process to establish common ground among team members and to understand and prioritize user needs. In user-centered design, empathy maps are best used from the very beginning of the design process.

Both the process of making an empathy map and the finished artifact have important benefits for the organization:

Capture who a user or persona is
The empathy-mapping process helps distill and categorize your knowledge of the user into one place. It can be used to:

 

a.    Categorize and make sense of qualitative research (research notes, survey answers, user-interview transcripts)b.    Discover gaps in your current knowledge and identify the types of research needed to address it. A sparse empathy map indicates that more research needs to be done.c.    Create personas by aligning and grouping empathy maps covering individual users

 

Communicate a user or persona to others
An empathy map is a quick, digestible way to illustrate user attitudes and behaviors. Once created, it should act as a source of truth throughout a project and protect it from bias or unfounded assumptions.


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Swiss town denies passport to Dutch vegan because she is ‘too annoying’

Swiss town denies passport to Dutch vegan because she is ‘too annoying’ | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

"A Dutch vegan who applied for a Swiss passport has had her application rejected because the locals found her too annoying.
Nancy Holten, 42, moved to Switzerland from the Netherlands when she was eight years old and now has children who are Swiss nationals. However, when she tried to get a Swiss passport for herself, residents of Gipf-Oberfrick in the canton of Aargau rejected her application. Ms Holten, a vegan and animal rights activist, has campaigned against the use of cowbells in the village and her actions have annoyed the locals. The resident’s committee argued that if she does not accept Swiss traditions and the Swiss way of life, she should not be able to become an official national."


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Seth Dixon's curator insight, January 16, 1:04 PM

Fighting against local customs and place-based traditions can have some political repercussions

Matt Manish's curator insight, March 16, 2:51 PM
What a unique situation! On one hand it does seem to be a bit ridiculous to deny someone of a passport just because they are "annoying". Also, Nancy Holten who is mentioned in the article does make a good point about the cow bells are hurting the cows in the town she is applying for citizenship in. But as I read further into this article and learned how she is trying to change many of the town's cultural traditions, it began to make more sense why the citizens of the town do not want to grant her citizenship. I find it interesting Holten still wants to move to this Swiss town after they rejected her passport twice already, since most people look for places to live with good neighbors, not a whole town that thinks you're annoying. Ultimately, now that this case has escalated further into an upper level of the Swiss government, it will be compelling to see if Holten is granted Swiss citizenship after all.
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Here's Why Empaths And Highly Sensitive People Suffer From Anxiety

Here's Why Empaths And Highly Sensitive People Suffer From Anxiety | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
The Empath’s Anxiety

Empaths are scientifically proven to be more susceptible to anxiety, social anxiety, and depression. A study published in the Journal of Psychiatry indicates that:

Individuals with social phobia (SP) show sensitivity and attentiveness to other people’s states of mind.

Meaning that individuals who suffer from social anxiety may also be extremely empathetic and susceptible to the feelings of others. This study concludes that:

. . . socially anxious individuals may demonstrate a unique social-cognitive abilities profile with elevated cognitive empathy tendencies and high accuracy in affective mental state attributions.

This hypersensitivity to emotions also causes empaths to become ill and suffer from stress, experience burnout in the workplace, and suffer from physical pain more often than others.

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5,300-year-old ice man Ötzi was indeed killed by an arrow

5,300-year-old ice man Ötzi was indeed killed by an arrow | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

A scientist has finally confirmed with 3D models that legendary ice man Ötzi was indeed killed 5,300 years ago by an arrow.

 

Ötzi, a 5,300-year-old mummified man, was found in 1991 in a glacier in the Alps between what is now Austria and Italy. Since the discovery, Ötzi has been examined by multiple teams of scientists, with new discoveries coming to light each time. Now an expert claims it was the arrow that delivered the fatal blow, severing the nerve to his shoulder and hitting his major vessels.

 

Since his discovery on 19 December 1991 by German hikers, Ӧtzi has provided window into early human history. His mummified remains were uncovered in melting glacier in the mountainous border between Austria and Italy. Analysis of the body has told us that he was alive during the Copper Age and died a grisly death.

 

Ötzi, who was 46 at the time of his death, had brown eyes, relatives in Sardinia, and was lactose intolerant. He was also predisposed to heart disease. Recent research focused on the DNA in the nuclei of Ötzi's cells, and it could yield further insights into the famous ice mummy's life.


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Up on the roof: birds, bees & biosolar

Up on the roof: birds, bees & biosolar | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

In times of booming urbanization, space in our cities is increasingly at a premium; yet, there exist acres of underutilized realty all around us…

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(Empathic Leadership) Why the Empathetic Leader Is the Best Leader

(Empathic Leadership) Why the Empathetic Leader Is the Best Leader | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
It’s All About Empathy
Sinek says researching his latest book has even changed the way he conducts his own life and business. “The lesson I’m learning is that I’m useless by myself. My success hinges entirely on the people I work with—the people who enlist themselves to join me in my vision. And it’s my responsibility to see that they’re working at their best capacity.”

Empathy—the ability to recognize and share other people’s feelings—is the most important instrument in a leader’s toolbox, Sinek believes. It can be expressed in the simple words, “Is everything OK?”

It’s what effective leaders ask an employee, instead of commanding “Clean out your desk” when he or she starts slacking off. It’s what you ask a client when a once-harmonious relationship gets rocky. “I really believe in quiet confrontation,” Sinek says. “If you had a good working relationship with someone and it’s suddenly gone sour, I believe in saying something like, ‘When we started we were both so excited, and it’s become really difficult now. Are you OK? What’s changed?’ ”

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How to escape the Drama Triangle  through empathy

How to escape the Drama Triangle  through empathy | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
The corners of the Drama Triangle
The Drama Triangle is a concept that defines the three roles people typically take on in high-conflict situations. Contrary to its name, the triangle doesn’t have to involve three people; it simply follows how different personalities affect each other during a conflict:

    The Victim – When problems arise, the victim tends to look helplessly inward. They spin a small anxiety (like, say, not answering a boss’s email on the weekend) into an outsized disaster (“I’m definitely getting fired!”). Hello Drama Queen!


    The Rescuer – The rescuer is the classic enabler who swoops in to save the day. He or she can be relied upon to always a put out a fire or show up at the last minute. Well-meaning to a fault, this “fixer” behavior can lead to resentment and burnout. Reluctant Confronters by nature, rescuers don’t speak up even when wronged.


    The Persecutor – We all know the persecutor. The go-to strategies are often controlling, blaming, and criticizing. In arguments, he or she will put you down and try to shame you into forgiveness. The persecutor’s refrain? “It’s all your fault.”


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100 Years of Votes for (some) Women.To celebrate this historic event, a short film on two remarkable suffragettes, Flora Murray and Louisa Garrett Anderson. @openuniversity

100 Years of Votes for (some) Women.To celebrate this historic event, a short film on two remarkable suffragettes, Flora Murray and Louisa Garrett Anderson. @openuniversity | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
" It's the centenary of the Representation of the People Act, which allowed some women over the age of 30 to vote. Explore suffrage and women's history here...

On February 6th 1918, The Representation of the People Act gave the vote to women over the age of 30 who met a property qualification.

 To celebrate this historic event we've made a short film on two remarkable suffragettes, Flora Murray and Louisa Garrett Anderson.

Check out their incredible story below then dig deeper into our resources on suffragettes, women's history and feminism. "


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Endell Street Military Hospital: A Suffragette story

How did women (including suffragettes) help wounded soldiers in the First World War? Dr Sara Haslam draws on her research into The War Library and Endel
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"Under The Surface" - Empathy Film.  If you could see inside other people's hearts........


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Votre – Remember People

Votre – Remember People | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

Remember everything about others by writing about them in your diary. Votre organizes all the information for you.


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Nik Peachey's curator insight, January 23, 10:44 AM

A handy free tool to use as a learning journal.

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4 Empath Survival Techniques

4 Empath Survival Techniques | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
Anna Hunt - Living in the sea of other people’s emotions requires some important empath survival techniques.
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Empathy Vs Sympathy

Empathy Vs Sympathy | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
Empathy is often confused with pity, sympathy, and compassion, which are each reactions to the plight of others.

 

Pity is a feeling of discomfort at the distress of one or more sentient beings, and often has paternalistic or condescending overtones. Implicit in the notion of pity is that its object does not deserve its plight, and, moreover, is unable to prevent, reverse, or overturn it. Pity is less engaged than empathy, sympathy, or compassion, amounting to little more than a conscious acknowledgement of the plight of its object.


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Scientists just uncovered the cause of a massive epidemic which killed the Aztecs, using 500-year-old teeth

Scientists just uncovered the cause of a massive epidemic which killed the Aztecs, using 500-year-old teeth | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
Nearly 500 years ago, in what we know call Mexico, a disease started rippling through the population.

 

It bore the name cocoliztli, meaning ‘pestilence,’ and it killed between five and 15 million people in just three years. As many plagues were at the time, it proved deadly and mysterious, burning through entire populations. Occurring centuries before John Snow’s work on cholera gave rise to epidemiology, data on the disease’s devastation was sparse. Over the years, researchers and historians attempted to pin the blame for the illness on measles, plague, viral hemorrhagic fevers like Ebola, and typhoid fever—a disease caused by a variation of the bacteria Salmonella enterica.

 

In a paper published this week in Nature Ecology & Evolution, researchers present evidence that the latter was the most likely candidate in this cast of microbial miscreants. The study was pre-printed in biorxiv last year. The researchers detected the genome of a different variety of Salmonella enterica (the specific variety is Paratyphi C) in teeth of individuals buried in a cemetery historically linked to the deadly outbreak.

 

The researchers used a technique called MALT (MEGAN Alignment Tool) to analyze DNA left behind in the pulp of the teeth. MALT takes a sample of material, in this case from a tooth, and compares it to 6,247 known bacterial genomes. The results identified Salmonella enterica in 10 burials associated with the epidemic.


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Empathy between man and environment

Empathy between man and environment | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it
How might we change people’s attitudes and who should take on this challenging task? 

It’s important, first of all, to try to better understand what forces are driving behaviour and begin to discuss the values which support them. If the only goal is to produce food at a low cost, the current agri-food system is fine as is. But if, for example, we want to produce healthy food which aims for environmental, economic and social sustainability, it’s essential to try to get people coming from very different points of view in touch.

 

The values we need to work on can’t just be “taught”. Instead, they must be transmitted through experience: we need to create empathy between humankind and the environment. Sustainability and resilience aren’t just technical matters: they also need to be approached from a social perspective.


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Carol Gilligan - Ethics of care

Carol Gilligan - Ethics of care | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

9. What are important issues for the ethics of care in the future?
To address the question of why the ethics of care is still embattled (especially in the U.S.) but also now in Europe), to consider the ethics of care in light of new evidence in the human sciences that as humans we are by nature empathic and responsive beings, hard-wired for cooperation.

Rather than asking how do we gain the capacity to care, the questions become how do we come not to care; how do we lose the capacity for empathy and mutual understanding?

 

It is also crucial to clarify that within a patriarchal framework, the ethics of care is a “feminine” ethic, whereas within a democratic framework it is a human ethic, grounded in core democratic values: the importance of everyone having a voice and being listened to carefully and heard with respect. The premise of equal voice then allows conflicts to be addressed in relationships. Different voices then become integral to the vitality of a democratic society.


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Oxygen is disappearing from the world's oceans at an alarmingly rapid pace

Oxygen is disappearing from the world's oceans at an alarmingly rapid pace | Interesting Reading to learn English -intermediate - advanced (B1, B2, C1,) | Scoop.it

The ocean is running out of oxygen at a rapid speed—and the depletion could choke to death much of the marine life these waters support. A sweeping review published Thursday in Science documented the causes, consequences and solutions to what is technically called “deoxygenation.” They discovered a four-to-tenfold increase in areas of the ocean with little to no oxygen, which researchers say is alarming because half of Earth’s oxygen originates from the ocean.

 

Oxygen is crucial for marine life in the oceans. Without oxygen, marine life will die off or relocate. “Animal life in the ocean needs oxygen to breathe,” Lisa Levin, study co-author and biological oceanographer at Scripps Institution of Oceanography at the University of California San Diego, told Newsweek. “If we want a healthy ocean, we need an ocean with oxygen in it.”

 

The team of scientists is from the United Nations Intergovernmental Oceanographic Commission’s working group, created in 2016 and called the Global Ocean Oxygen Network. They noted that the amount of water in the open ocean without oxygen has quadrupled in 50 years. It is more than twice as bad for coastal waters, such as estuaries and seas. In those sites, low-oxygen areas have increased tenfold since 1950. This paper is the first to look at both ocean and coastal waters, which are often studied separately.

 

Deoxygenation directly results in devastation for people’s livelihoods. Fish kills in a single town in the Philippines cost over $10 million, according to the researchers. Coral reefs are valued at $172 billion per year, according to the Smithsonian’s National Museum of Natural History. Already stressed and bleaching corals, caused by increased sea surface temperatures, can be harmed by a lack of oxygen too. “There are a whole bunch of livelihoods that depend on a healthy ocean that doesn't smell and have a lot of dead stuff in it,” Levin said.“When the oxygen gets very low in the ocean, animals leave if they can,” Levin added. Those species will relocate, get eaten or starve to death.


Via Neelima Sinha, Dr. Stefan Gruenwald
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