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Coaching: It’s All About Hearing the Truth You Don’t Want to Hear

Coaching: It’s All About Hearing the Truth You Don’t Want to Hear | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Recently I was on a panel with a client of mine. We had been coaching for about 12 months when we were invited to talk about our coaching relationship. She started the discussion by saying, “Linda ...

 

Recently I was on a panel with a client of mine. We had been coaching for about 12 months when we were invited to talk about our coaching relationship. She started the discussion by saying, “Linda was my second choice as a coach.” Everyone in the room laughed at this!

 

Then my client continued. “I had interviewed another coach prior to meeting Linda. I loved the other coach. There was great chemistry. During the interview with Linda, she made me very angry. It was on a Friday, and I was angry all weekend. I was stewing because I knew that the first coach would become a good friend, and that Linda would help me get where I wanted to go.”

 

This is not the first time this situation has occurred. I remember another interview several years ago.

 

That gentleman was so angry that he said he didn’t even want referrals from me to other coaches. He’d find them himself! Several weeks later, he contacted me again and said, “I’ve interviewed 4 other coaches, and the voice I keep hearing in my head is yours. You told me the truth I didn’t want to hear.”

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Surviving Leadership Chaos
" We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give. " - Winston Churchill
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Serving and Leadership on Facebook!

Serving and Leadership on Facebook! | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Articles and Ideas relating to leadership, serving, and culture.
donhornsby's insight:

I have established a companion page to this curation effort on Facebook.  Could you drop by today and 'like' the page?  

The plans include a new blog debuting in 2015.

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Anne Egros's comment, April 23, 2013 7:55 AM
Done it Don, thanks for sharing great content
Patricia D. Sadar - Leadership Strength Coach's comment, August 15, 2013 7:49 AM
Thank you ....just liked the page Don. Love the elephants :)
Joe Boutte's comment, April 5, 2014 7:40 AM
Great page and thank you for creating it!
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Clutter is Killing Your Creativity

Clutter is Killing Your Creativity | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Why a messy desk isn’t as artistic as you think
donhornsby's insight:

This process of cleaning up your message is not intuitive for most people. But it is important, an essential discipline for anyone with something to say. And if you don’t know where to begin, start here:

 

Reclaim your inbox. Throw away magazines and newspapers you have no intention of reading. Clean up your email, getting it down to a manageable amount (zero, if you can).Clean up your desk. Again, throw away stuff you haven’t used in months.Find a clean space to create. This is different for everyone, but it needs to not stress you out.Limit distractions. Turn off email, phone, and social media tools. Force yourself to focus on one thing at a time.Start creating clutter-free messages. Remember: less is more. Use restrictions to be more creative.Repeat this for the rest of your life.
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Take Care of the Little Things And The Big Things Will Take Care Of Itself

Take Care of the Little Things And The Big Things Will Take Care Of Itself | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
As leaders if we take care of the small things with excellence then we will have accomplished the big things with success.
donhornsby's insight:

Take care of the little things and the big things will be taken care with ease.

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Five Routines for Growing Leaders

Five Routines for Growing Leaders | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

There is comfort in rituals, and rituals provide a framework for stability when you are trying to find answers. – Deborah Norville

 

Insights into the routines of these creative people prompted me to think about the necessary disciplines for growing leaders. Your growth as a leader is not a passive and disengaged process. Not if you want to grow.

donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): Growing leaders are connected leaders. It’s through the growth and development of your personal and professional relationships that you mature. Being connected gives you a sense of community but it also runs deeper. It's when you are able to let your guard down, take your mask off and be vulnerable, that you can truly see growth as a leader. Are you a detached leader? If so, then get connected- your growth depends on it.

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3 ways Steve Jobs made meetings productive

3 ways Steve Jobs made meetings productive | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
With American businesses losing an estimated $37 billion a year due to meeting mistakes, Drake Baer explains how Steve Jobs made his meetings productive.

Via Kevin Watson
donhornsby's insight:

Excellent list to consider!  

 

(From the article): Every Wednesday afternoon, he had an agenda-less meeting with his marketing and advertising team.

 

Slideshows were banned because Jobs wanted his team to debate passionately and think critically, all without leaning on technology.

“I hate the way people use slide presentations instead of thinking,” Jobs told Isaacson. “People would confront a problem by creating a presentation. I wanted them to engage, to hash things out at the table, rather than show a bunch of slides. People who know what they’re talking about don’t need PowerPoint.”

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What makes a good business leader?

What makes a good business leader? | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Humility, doubt and the ability to make mistakes.
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): "Showing vulnerability sometimes as a CEO is not a bad thing, but it's not always easy… CEOs don't like to be vulnerable, and show their weaknesses. Actually for me, it's something I have to really think about and really force myself to do."

 

Establishing exactly how you do that is tricky. It's possible to try too hard.

 

"The worst thing you can do is go on an authenticity course", says Mr Morris.

 

"You need to be consistent with your values, your purpose, with what you want to do and why."

 

Mr Morris says the power of social media means that it's impossible to switch off and dealing with that required much more subtlety than in the past.

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3 Ways to Lose a Job Before You Get It

3 Ways to Lose a Job Before You Get It | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

When it comes to landing a new job or a big promotion, follow up can be almost as important as the interview itself.

donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): Well-written, thoughtful follow up letters and emails show a lot about your character and can put you over the top. The key is not just to write the note, but also to write a GREAT note. Here are three things that can help you avoid an embarrassing situation. Take your time; I’ve seen enough things go wrong when people rush.

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Looking for a job? Ditch the resume tips and open a marketing book

Looking for a job? Ditch the resume tips and open a marketing book | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
To succeed in the job search, consider thinking like a marketer.
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): Marketing is all about getting to the next round. You have to advance to the interview phase if you want a shot at closing the deal. If you rely on your application materials to win over an employer, you probably won’t impress the companies you’re after. Don’t be a depressing statistic — stop thinking like an applicant, and start thinking like a marketer.

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How Do You Get People to Work Harder? Just Turn Them Loose

How Do You Get People to Work Harder? Just Turn Them Loose | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

Here’s a fundamental question: How do you get people to work? Answering fundamentally, you form a contract with them consisting of a set amount of compensation and benefits in return for an equally set amount of work.

 

Less fundamental and more important (or at least more interesting) is this question – How do you get people to work harder on what matters most to you?


Via Roger Francis
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): As a leader, you do hold unique responsibility for ensuring there are opportunities for such exposure, for those on your team to work closely with others. But then, turn your people loose. Let them explore ways they can contribute differently within their own team and across departments or groups.

 

That’s how you break down silos, but it’s also how you give people the three hallmarks of engagement espoused by Dan Pink in Drive – autonomy, mastery, and purpose.

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Top 8 Ways to Disrupt Your Own Routine

Top 8 Ways to Disrupt Your Own Routine | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Here are some no-cost, easy ways to violently disrupt your daily grind and gently expand your own awareness.
donhornsby's insight:

We all need help to change from destructive habits to new ways of behavior. Here are some nice suggestions on how to do just that...

 

(From the article): Try any of these daily disruptors for a week and see if you can detect any lasting change in your mood or your behavior. Then leave a comment detailing your results.

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Can you afford to lead without integrity?

Can you afford to lead without integrity? | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Is integrity an essential leadership skill? Hiroo Chothia on why businesses need to lead with more integrity

Via Roger Francis
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article):  Trust is a very evocative word in the business world. It means different things to different people, depending on their gender, ethnicity, culture, background and geography.  Corporate behaviour is definitely under the microscope with widespread perception of a disconnect between corporate behaviour and ethical conduct.  In this climate, it would be very easy to jump to measurement and greater legal requirements.  Whilst issues such as compliance are a vital aspect of good governance, recent research published by Roger Steare and colleagues indicates a strong relationship between ethical leadership and performance as well as ethics being key to employee engagement. 


Clearly, there is a need to go back to basics to define what ethical behaviour means both for the individual and the organisation.  Those organisations that have travelled this route have benefited from creating a ‘speak-up’ culture; confidence in the market as well as commitment from employees who buy-into the idea that ‘good thinking = good business’.

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Kimberley Richardson's curator insight, January 16, 9:01 AM

Leading with integrity is all about doing the right thing for yourself and the company.  There is no leadership without it.

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How to detox your flabby, unhealthy business

How to detox your flabby, unhealthy business | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Treat your business to the corporate equivalent of cold-pressed juices and hot yoga
donhornsby's insight:

Isn't it a good time to detox your flabby, unhealthy business (or service)? 


(From the article): A new year gives us a chance for a fresh start, to try once more to be the manager and person we’ve always aspired to be.

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Social Media: Vital Tool for Global Leaders

Social Media: Vital Tool for Global Leaders | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Trust, accountability, priorities and alignment are critical responsibilities for modern leaders. Social media tools can help global leaders maximize their impact.
donhornsby's insight:

Social media is the single greatest tool available to leaders, for maximizing influence.

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donhornsby's curator insight, January 12, 7:59 AM

(From the article): Social media offers leaders the opportunity to join the communities of their stakeholders, share more easily, more frequently and receive more direct feedback than ever before. It baffles me that more people don’t recognize this incredible power and potential social media holds for leadership influence. If you want to serve your stakeholders to the best of your ability, open up your social media toolbox and start building solutions to these common leadership challenges.

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AVAILABILITY: A Key Leadership Trait

Why is availability a key trait for leaders? 

donhornsby's insight:

To be withdrawn and be unavailable means that they can be a resource to help and add value to others. A key trait.

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Putting leadership under the magnifying glass

Putting leadership under the magnifying glass | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Let's start recognising just how important self-awareness is.
donhornsby's insight:

(from the article): In order to meet this challenge leadership development needs to be focussed more on improving self-awareness and interpersonal skills. Leadership development also needs to filter down through organisations using a common and simple language in order that managers at all levels can develop the personal skills to work effectively together as leaders and help their people to thrive.

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Kimberley Richardson's curator insight, January 27, 9:22 AM

With personal awareness, comes personal leadership.  All other leadership qualities, flow from there.

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Should Mission Statements Be Mission Questions?

Should Mission Statements Be Mission Questions? | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

Whether or not the mission statement is phrased as a question, it should be subject to constant questioning:

 

Does it still make sense today?


Are we, as a company, still living up to it (if we ever did)?


Is the mission growing and pulling us forward?


And lastly, Are we all on this mission together?

donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): Whether mission questions come from throughout the ranks or are posed by leaders themselves, the point is to keep asking, What are we doing? Why are we doing it? How might we do it better? As Shaich says, “Figuring out what you want to accomplish is a continual search— and questions are the means to the search.” 

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5 Ways to Gauge Commitment Level

5 Ways to Gauge Commitment Level | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

Whether it’s a New Years Goal, a business plan or a relationship, when someone makes a commitment there are 5 ways to tell if they’re really all-in.

donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): Whatever it takes....This is a sure sign someone is really all-in committed. They are willing to do whatever it takes and don’t even consider the alternative. They’re willing to take on discomfort, challenges, and even pain if needed to honor their commitment. They just keep moving forward.

 

To what or whom have you made a commitment? Are you all-in? If so, I guarantee you will see the desired results you’re after.

Each day is a culmination of all your yesterdays.

Each day, choose one thing you can do to honor your commitment and stick with it!

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What are your working hours?

What are your working hours? | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

What are your working hours? When do you work, and when do you rest?

donhornsby's insight:

(From the Article): We live in a time of amazing possibilities. We can work with people around the world, people we would never meet without technology. We can talk, share, and work together across vast distances.

 

As we grasp the benefits that give us more opportunities to work, we lose sight of the benefits of rest.

 

As our capacity to connect grows, we are responsible to protect what seems to be evaporating. What seemed natural in the past now needs to be preserved.

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How to Write a Business Plan

How to Write a Business Plan | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

When preparation of a business plan is at the top of the SBA list of the ten steps to starting a business, it tells you something about how important the experts consider it to be. Planning a business and writing a business plan is more than just having a location picked and a product or service to sell. 


Via Daniel Watson, Roger Francis
donhornsby's insight:

Financing, marketing strategy and future growth all require a well-researched and thought out business plan.

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Bartolomeu Fonseca's curator insight, January 23, 7:21 AM

A wonderful Business plan lesson....Congrats!

Tiffany Crosby's curator insight, January 23, 10:57 AM

Here's a comprehensive but palatable guide to writing a business plan. You will find links to examples and additional information. It's worth a read if you want to start a business. However, I wouldn't recommend developing a business plan in a vacuum, if you've never tried to do one before. Since this is one of the most important foundational steps you can take, it's worth investing the time in a coach that can challenge your thinking.  

Tammy Hunt's curator insight, January 25, 11:02 AM

No business should ever begin without a solid plan as it's foundation.

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7 Powerful Things Successful People Do At The End Of Each Day

7 Powerful Things Successful People Do At The End Of Each Day | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Learn the habits of successful people that made them into the men and women they are today.
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): There are a lot of habits successful people follow, either naturally or through sheer discipline, that help make them successful. If you use the same tactics, you might be able to reap rewards similar to what they’ve achieved. Here are 7 powerful things successful people do at the end of every day.

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What to expect if you want to reinvent yourself

What to expect if you want to reinvent yourself | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
There’s definitely a science and an art to taking yourself to the next level.
donhornsby's insight:

(From the article): There’s definitely a science and an art to taking yourself to the next level. And while each person and his or her circumstances are different, there are some common elements that everyone could benefit from. So, if you want to reinvent yourself you need to know what to expect and how to deal with it. You need to:...

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. #Top 100 #Leadership #Experts to #Follow on #Twitter

. #Top 100 #Leadership #Experts to #Follow on #Twitter | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
This is a list of the top 100 recommended leadership experts to follow on Twitter for January 2015.

Via Rami Kantari
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Who Needs Rebels at Work?

Who Needs Rebels at Work? | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
By Carmen Medina "I promise to read the book and make sure to keep it from all the people in my group. Last thing I need are rebels." The above is a genuine reaction we received from a longstanding friend about our new book "Rebels at Work: A Handbook for Leading Change [...]

Via Dr. Susan Bainbridge, Kevin Watson
donhornsby's insight:

Rehabilitating your Troublemakers. Corporate leaders may worry that Rebels at Work will create gangs of rebellious employees (cue Les Miserables). But the reality is rebels are already inside your corporate gates and increasingly unhappy. Many of them have the potential to become positive forces for your organization — to become good rebels. For that to happen, however, employees need different skills and managers need more effective ways of managing individuals who think differently.

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Ivon Prefontaine's curator insight, January 14, 8:08 PM

But rebelling is not just about rebelling. It is about changing the way things are done and the paradigm within which it is done. Retaining neo-colonial and patriarchal ways does not change anything.

 

@ivon_ehd1

Joe Boutte's curator insight, January 16, 8:12 AM

Rebels who still understand the vision of the organization and find new ways to stir the pot and innovative approaches to achieving the objectives are needed in every organization.

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7 Qualities That Will Get You Hired

7 Qualities That Will Get You Hired | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it

Different roles require different skills and attributes. But the best people we hire at WPP tend to have some very important characteristics in common. Here’s my top seven:

donhornsby's insight:

A great list!

 

(From the article): Last but definitely not least, I look for people who really care about winning and losing. I take it personally when we lose a piece of business, or someone leaves the company. After nearly 30 years in the job, losing still gets to me.

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Jedi Mind Tricks to Always Meet Your Deadlines

Jedi Mind Tricks to Always Meet Your Deadlines | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Want to get things done on time, every time? Science suggests that simple tweaks to how you frame your tasks can help.
donhornsby's insight:
(From the article): Rethink your due date.

Rationally, it shouldn't matter if work is due this month or next if, in both cases, you have the exact same number of days to get it done. But research shows that humans are weird animals: It very much does matter.

 

A study outlined by Korkki found that having a deadline that sounded closer--in this year or month rather than next, for example--was more likely to be completed on time as people are likely to feel the due date is nearer to the present, ratcheting up the pressure and preventing situational procrastination. The takeaway? When you're filling up your calendar, try to make your deadlines appear as close to the present as you can (so think of that report as due on Dec. 31, 2015, for instance, rather than Jan. 1, 2016).

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You Are a Change Leader

You Are a Change Leader | Surviving Leadership Chaos | Scoop.it
Change leaders are a unique breed. To an extent they are born, not made. There are certain skills necessary to be successful and they can be developed!
donhornsby's insight:

Are you a change leader?  Do you possess the skills necessary to be a successful change leader?

 

(From the article): Change leadership is the ability to energize groups who will be implementing change projects that they may or may not buy into. It’s important for change leaders to understand the need for change and demonstrate a high tolerance for ambiguity and a positive attitude. Change leadership also means defining areas for change; managing change initiatives smoothly by anticipating, preparing and responding effectively to roadblocks; creating an open, receptive work environment; and involving people at all levels in the change initiative. At higher levels leading complex change involves understanding cultural dynamics in play and developing practical strategies to achieve the best advantage for the organization, as well as those working on the change team. 

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