I’m a fan of healthy workplaces that appreciate that we are all human and rich emotional lives come with our humanity – so why not let our emotions show?
Yet for a leader, showing your anger in a way that tears others down can be destructive to your attempts to build a solid team and other workplace relationships that are open and honest.
One leader I know wondered why her team wasn’t responding to her attempts to get them involved in conversations around strategic decisions. She also noticed that her team rarely came into her office with problems to talk through. She saw this as a good sign that they were smart and capable of taking care of things themselves.
She was pleased to have such a skilled team… until something really big happened involving one of her managers that should have required an early intervention on her part. Her manager heard about it before she did. And then she was fired.
On later reflection, she realized that her previous approach of “shooting the messenger” of bad news by getting angry didn’t serve her or the organization well; it kept people from being involved and from telling her things she needed to know.
I know how destructive a show of anger can be in the workplace and together with some very smart clients, I’ve learned some ways to help them recognize and deal with their anger before it becomes destructive.
This is one method that often works well:...