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Here are the acceptable ways to get revenge on a cheater (and one unacceptable way)

Here are the acceptable ways to get revenge on a cheater (and one unacceptable way) | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
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'BriaAndChrissy' YouTube Star Opens Up About Revenge Porn Legal Battle

'BriaAndChrissy' YouTube Star Opens Up About Revenge Porn Legal Battle | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Chrissy Chambers said her ex-boyfriend secretly taped himself having sex with her while she was passed out drunk then allegedly released the video online.
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The Shocking Sexualization of Female Politicians in Porn

The Shocking Sexualization of Female Politicians in Porn | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
The effects of sexualizing and slut-shaming women candidates are massive—and dire.
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Facebook: New 'revenge porn' and impersonation reporting tools are being tested (Wired UK)

Facebook: New 'revenge porn' and impersonation reporting tools are being tested (Wired UK) | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Facebook is testing impersonation and 'revenge porn' reporting tools
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Hacker who stole nude photos of female celebrities will plead guilty

Hacker who stole nude photos of female celebrities will plead guilty | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Ryan Collins, a 36-year-old from Lancaster, Pennsylvania, used a phishing scheme to collect nude photos of female celebrities, including Jennifer Lawrence.
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Jury awards Hulk Hogan $115 million in sex, celebrity and privacy case

Jury awards Hulk Hogan $115 million in sex, celebrity and privacy case | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
For most of his adult life, the camera has been Hulk Hogan’s best friend, capturing him body slamming opponents to the mat in the wrestling ring, spinning, glaring and taunting all who might try to take him on. But the image of the wrestling star was far less flattering when a grainy sex tap
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‘Breakup Nightmare’: Lifetime Movie ‘Break Up Nightmare’ Takes On Revenge Porn, Like The True Story Of Charlotte Laws, Hunter Moore

‘Breakup Nightmare’: Lifetime Movie ‘Break Up Nightmare’ Takes On Revenge Porn, Like The True Story Of Charlotte Laws, Hunter Moore | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Breakup Nightmare is a fantastic new film that is scheduled to air on the Lifetime channel this Sunday. Also known as Break Up Nightmare, the dramatic thriller
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B.C. man's revenge website reveals limits in criminal harassment law

B.C. man's revenge website reveals limits in criminal harassment law | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
The British Columbia Crown's decision not to charge a man who created a revenge website to destroy his ex-wife's reputation reveals the limits of criminal harassment law in the digital age, experts say.
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Activists Fight to Secure Legal Recourse for Revenge Porn Victims

Activists Fight to Secure Legal Recourse for Revenge Porn Victims | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
For all its benefits, the rapid development of social media has brought with it new occasions for exploitation and harassment — and oftentimes these offenses go unpunished. But women are mobilizing to combat one especially pernicious form of online sexual violence: revenge porn.
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Inside the Torturous Fight to End Revenge Porn | Broadly

What can you do when a jilted lover posts your most intimate pictures online without consent? Broadly investigates what happens to victims of revenge porn who are navigating uncharted legal territory.
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Holyrood committee backs new 'revenge porn' law - BBC News

Holyrood committee backs new 'revenge porn' law - BBC News | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
A Holyrood committee gives its backing to a new bill which would make so-called "revenge porn" a criminal offence.
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Watch The 'King Of Revenge Porn' Realize Revenge Porn Is Bad

Watch The 'King Of Revenge Porn' Realize Revenge Porn Is Bad | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Scott Breitenstein has been called an “Internet terrorist." He is the owner of ComplaintsBureau.com, a site that hosts user-submitted grievances of all types and, until recently, revenge porn. Watch Breitenstein question his website's morality in the first episode of Fusion's "Real Future."
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Revenge porn: the industry profiting from online abuse

Revenge porn: the industry profiting from online abuse | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Sites charge $100 a year to access private photos and videos of non-porn stars in the nude, usually posted by spurned ex-lovers – but it doesn’t end there
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'Revenge porn' website operator sentenced to 18 years

'Revenge porn' website operator sentenced to 18 years | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
A 28-year-old San Diego man was sentenced Friday to 18 years in custody after being convicted of operating a "revenge porn" website that included naked and sexually explicit pictures of women posted by angry ex-boyfriends or ex-husbands. Kevin Christopher Bollaert, a Web developer, posted th
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A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words: The Truth About Revenge Pornography

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words: The Truth About Revenge Pornography | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Revenge pornography is defined as “the sexually explicit portrayal of one or more people distributed without their consent via any medium
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Ducey signs measures on school testing, pimping of kids, revenge porn

Ducey signs measures on school testing, pimping of kids, revenge porn | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Under new law districts will be able to choose which test to give students.
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Teen Girls And Social Media: A Story Of 'Secret Lives' And Misogyny

Teen Girls And Social Media: A Story Of 'Secret Lives' And Misogyny | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Author Nancy Jo Sales says the Internet fosters a kind of sexism that is harmful to teen girls. Her new book is American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers.
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RI lawmakers consider cyberstalking bills

RI lawmakers consider cyberstalking bills | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Rhode Island lawmakers are considering new plans aimed at cracking down on cyberstalking and revenge porn.The proposals were heard by the Senate Judiciary Committee Tuesday night.Attorney General Peter f. Kilmartin is introducing the measures, which includ
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Revenge porn could become a crime in Arizona this week

Revenge porn could become a crime in Arizona this week | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Revenge porn could become a crime in Arizona if Gov. Doug Ducey signs House Bill 2001.
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How social media is destroying the lives of teen girls

How social media is destroying the lives of teen girls | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Slut pages. Sink shots. Yik Yak. Finstas. Kik. Snapchat. Revenge porn. Tinder food stamps.

If that reads like a different language, chances are you’re not an American teenager on social media.



It’s this world — a chaotic mix of nude photos, cyber-bullying and dysfunctional relationships — that author Nancy Jo Sales ventured into when researching her new book, “American Girls: Social Media and the Secret Lives of Teenagers” (Knopf).

Sales has been studying the lives of American teenagers since the 1990s. During her 2 1/2 years of research for “American Girls,” she was alarmed, though not shocked, by what she found. (Most adult readers will be shocked by, as Sales points out, how wildly the adult experience of social media differs from that of a teen. An adult might be on Facebook and Twitter, but they probably haven’t even heard of most of the apps that teens use, let alone how they use them.)

“What’s being expressed on social media has been percolating in our culture for decades,” Sales tells The Post.

“But I was really troubled by the sexual harassment of teenage girls. It’s something that happens online on a daily basis — sometimes an hourly basis. And it’s so common, it’s become a regular part of teen culture. You’ll read an article about ‘sexting rings’ but what these articles miss is that it’s not at just one school. It’s happening at every school I researched. It’s become so common.”



Other aspects of teen culture Sales discusses in the book: slut pages, where nude photos of a girl, originally sent to one boy, are distributed to others — i.e., a sexting ring — and then posted on Instagram accounts like “[Name of School] Hotties” or “[Name of Town] Hos” for everyone to view and comment on, often dismissively. This is typically followed by a kind of schoolwide shaming (of the girl — never the boy) that calls to mind the tarring and feathering of Puritan New England, as was with a case from Boca Raton, Fla., which Sales details in the book.

Recounts 13-year-old Julie: “[My sister’s friend] was having a hard time, she was acting out. She’s a senior in high school and she was caught giving head to a boy — it was at a party and somebody walked in and took a picture and it went all over social media. And so many people were hating on her in the school and she literally had no friends left except my sister. She was being called a slut and it got to her really badly, cause she suffers from anxiety and depression, and she wanted to kill herself.”

A finsta: A fake Instagram account created under a different name, so that parents won’t know what their teens are up to online. “Especially if it’s like sixth-grade girls posting pictures in their bras. Or like they use them to talk crap about each other,” clarifies 15-year-old Kayla from Boca Raton in the book.

Tinder food stamps: Using the dating app to exchange sex for free meals and other items, a sort of soft prostitution that has become normalized by social media. “Some sugar babies have Amazon Wish Lists where they tell their sugar daddies what they would like to have,” Sales writes. “Everything from jewelry to silverware to furniture to magazine subscriptions.”

The sink shot: When a girl takes a selfie in a bathroom mirror, often in a thong, and poses with her behind propped against the sink, so that it will appear larger. Not surprisingly, Kim Kardashian popularized this sort of shot, also known as a “belfie,” or butt selfie.

Revenge porn: When a couple breaks up and the boy passes around nude photos the girl sent him in confidence.

Yik Yak and Kik: just two of the seemingly countless anonymous messaging apps that allow users to communicate with each other. Kik was the app cited in the January murder of 13-year-old Nicole Madison Lovell in Blacksburg, Va. The day before she died, Lovell showed neighbors Kik messages she had exchanged with an 18-year-old boy she was to meet that night. Two Virginia Tech freshmen are currently accused of her premeditated kidnapping and killing.

What Sales makes clear is just how prevalent social media is in the life of an American teenager. It’s not an occasional hobby, and most of the teens Sales spoke to spoke of how they were “addicted,” “obsessed” and “couldn’t stop” looking at their phones.

“For most American girls, social media is where they live,” writes Sales, who spoke to over 200 girls aged 13-19 from Manhattan to Florida, Arizona, Texas and Kentucky.



“We’re on it 24/7,” a 13-year-old girl in Montclair, NJ, told the author. “It’s all we do.”

And while teenagers have certainly always had sex, experimented with drugs, bullied each other and gotten into trouble, Sales is concerned by the way that social media magnifies these existing tendencies and makes young women matter less — they have less agency, less inclination to speak up about the online behavior that has become so prevalent.

“We’ve evolved to communicate face to face. Our communication occurs more with nonverbal cues, body language,” says Sales. “There are studies showing that kids now are less able to have a conversation and make eye contact. So how does this affect girls? Well, whenever you have a situation in which people are dehumanized, women and girls suffer more. We are already more objectified. It becomes easier [for boys] to see someone as a thing, rather than a person.”

Case in point: the widespread demanding of nude photos, sometimes by a crush or boyfriend, but often just from a random guy at school. (“Snapchat me that p---y if it’s cool” goes the refrain in the Yo Gotti song “Down in the DM [Direct Message]” wherein a man messages another man’s girlfriend requesting nudes after seeing a photo of her BMW on Instagram.)

“They have conversations with boys who [ask for nudes] and they think, ‘Maybe this how I have a relationship,’ ” Sales says. “And one of the girls told me that if you respond by saying, ‘How dare you?’ or get angry, they say you have no chill.”

As 13-year-old Sophia explains to Sales in the book: “‘They judge you if you don’t send nudes like you’re a prude. But if you just laugh, then they’ll be aggravated, but they won’t do anything bad to you . . . [such as] start rumors. Pretend like you sent them a naked picture they got off the Internet and it’s not even you.’ ”)

In a chapter called “Thirteen” (all of the book’s chapters are named for the age of the girls discussed therein), Sales describes Riley, Sophia and Victoria coming out of middle school at the end of the school day in Montclair. The girls are all crowded around Riley’s phone, which displays a screenshot of a Snapchat from a boy at school named Zach, asking her for nude photos.

This, it turns out, had been happening almost daily after Riley’s ex-boyfriend, Danny, had spread a rumor that she had given him oral sex. The rumor was untrue, started by another girl who had told Danny that Riley was flirting online with other guys. The girl had clearly hoped to cause a breakup, and did — after which Danny took to social media. “He called me a slut,” Riley said, “and everyone thought I was a slut and everyone started to hate me about that on social media. Like on Ask.fm.”



Ask.fm is a popular question-and-answer website and app where teens go, as a 2013 CNET article by Jennifer Van Grove put it, “to escape the built-in accountability of Facebook.” It allows anyone to post comments and questions to a user’s profile. “Want to know more about your best friend or your crush? Looking for good advice on how to handle life’s little challenges? Just want to ask an inspiring person you’ve never met on the other side of the world about their lives? Go for it! Others will ask you in return, about anything,” claims the official Ask.fm FAQ section.

Unfortunately, it’s also become the perfect forum for cyber-bullying and harassment. The app has been linked with at least seven teen suicides, according to an anti-bullying organization called No Bullying, including a 14-year-old named Hannah Smith from Leicestershire, England, who was routinely taunted by anonymous commenters who said things like “every[one] will be happy if u died,” “drink bleach” and “go die.”

Smith hanged herself in August of 2013 amidst receiving vile messages from Internet trolls for months. However, it has been reported that Smith possibly sent many of these messages to herself and that she engaged in self-cyber-bullying, a phenomenon best described as the virtual equivalent of cutting. Her parents have since become vocal advocates for the regulation of anonymity online.

Sales, who lives in the East Village, has a 15-year-old daughter who helped focus her research for the book. “She clued me in to a lot of stuff that was happening,” Sales says. The experience of researching and writing the book impressed upon her the necessity of having a conversation with her daughter — not just one, but an ongoing conversation about what was happening on social media.

“I never lost my sense of what it is to be a teenager, I’m not sure why,” Sales says. “Some of these things are painful. One thing that’s important to do as a parent is remember what it felt like and tap into that. They’re just coming of age, they’re experiencing these things for the first time. There needs to be a great deal of compassion when you try to put yourselves in their shoes. I try and think, ‘She’s telling me this story, and how would I feel if this were happening to me?’ So instead of coming at it from a point of judgement or alarm [as a parent], I try to get rid of the fear of what you’re hearing and just listen.

“People keep saying, ‘What am I supposed to do, take away her phone?’ No, that’s not what I’m saying in the book. Talk to [teens] about what they do on their phones and how much they’re on them.

“It’s a challenging landscape, much of it unprecedented in our experience. And I feel we all have a responsibility to guide our daughters and sons through it.”

While young women might have a tougher time on social media, it’s up to parents of both genders to take an active role in talking to their teens about what’s going on.

While some teens have stepped out of the social media loop altogether — 19-year-old Instagram star Essena O’Neill made headlines in the fall by quitting the app, saying, “social media is not real” — most don’t.

“I spoke to girls who said, ‘social media is destroying our lives,’ ” Sales says. “ ‘But we can’t go off it, because then we’d have no life.’ There’s this whole perception that [teenage girls] love social media, but in many ways they hate it. But they don’t stop, because that’s where teen culture is happening.”



Check out the most controversial girl on Instagram who critics liken to a modern-day Lolita by fueling fantasies for middle-aged men.
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Clergy Sign-on Letter for H.R. 3130/S. 1520 "We Will Speak Out U.S. is advocating for common sense bipartisan legislation that would close loopholes allowing convicted abusers and stalkers to buy a...

Clergy Sign-on Letter for H.R. 3130/S. 1520 "We Will Speak Out U.S. is advocating for common sense bipartisan legislation that would close loopholes allowing convicted abusers and stalkers to buy a... | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
We Will Speak Out U.S. is advocating for common sense bipartisan legislation that would close loopholes allowing convicted abusers and stalkers to buy and own guns
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'Few things… are more private than a sex video': $100,000 award in revenge porn case a Canadian first

'Few things… are more private than a sex video': $100,000 award in revenge porn case a Canadian first | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
It's been four years since an Ontario woman, 18, found out her ex had uploaded an intimate video of her to a porn site, and her case has become an important first
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At least 200 children, some as young as 11, have been victims of 'revenge porn' in past nine months

At least 200 children, some as young as 11, have been victims of 'revenge porn' in past nine months | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
Police deal with almost five cases a week where intimate photos of under-18s are shared without consent, figures obtained by The Telegraph reveal At least 200 children, some as young as 11, have been victims of "revenge porn." 
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Nursing Assistant Fired, Charged After Posting Nude Video of 93-Year-Old on Snapchat

Nursing Assistant Fired, Charged After Posting Nude Video of 93-Year-Old on Snapchat | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
The incident, which allegedly took place earlier this month, is the most recent in a string of surreptitious recordings by employees of nursing homes and assisted-living centers. Many involve the social media network Snapchat.
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The Big Business of Online Abuse

The Big Business of Online Abuse | Revenge and Involuntary Porn | Scoop.it
For a select few, Internet harassment isn’t just a way to bully others. It’s a way to rake in the bucks.
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