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Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide
Mourning: from end of life and last rites to kaddish and good griefwork
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80,0000 graves online at 1500 cemeteries

80,0000 graves online at 1500 cemeteries | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Online Begraafplaatsen. Grafmonumenten in Nederland. Vrijwel iedere begraafplaats in kaart. Foto's van de graven.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Forgetting what you've done sometimes results in pleasant surprises. Ancestry.com invited me to follow a link to information about my father. Of course I had submitted the photograph of his gravestone myself, but forgotten all about it. Now the page is bookmarked and this here scoop.it! will be a reminder. 

 

The mistake on the gravestone can't be fixed, but my year of birth can, and a volunteer will add my mom's name and the year that we added her ashes to my father's grave to the info already on the site. 

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Joe Biden's 2012 advice to grieving families is all the more poignant now

"There will come a day – I promise you, and your parents as well – when the thought of your son or daughter, or your husband or wife, brings a smile to your lips before it brings a tear to your eye."
Judith van Praag's insight:

A leader who knows personal deep grief offers support and wisdom from the heart, from the core of his being. My thoughts go out to Joe Biden and his family during this time of mourning. May their memories be of solace. 

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Memorial Video: 'Dear Puck, you'll be with us forever' - Famme

Memorial Video: 'Dear Puck, you'll be with us forever' - Famme | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Gisteren ontvingen we een video op de redactie. De titel luidde: ‘Lieve Puck, je blijft altijd bij ons’. We wisten gelijk dat het om een ontroerende video zou zijn, maar dat het zó aangrijpend en sterk tegelijkertijd was, dat konden we nooit raden. Merel en haar man zijn trotse ouders van drie zoons en ze […]
Judith van Praag's insight:

The text on the website of Famme is in Dutch, but the black and white video speaks for itself. Meral delivers still born baby girl at 37 weeks gestation. Her three little boys have ben looking forward to meeting their sister, and during the pregnancy they gave her the nickname (ukke = little) Puck. The video shows how the family says goodbye to the long awaited little girl.

Touching, and recognizable.

 

My heart goes out to Meral and her husband, their boys, family and friends. Making this memorial video is only the beginning of a long process. Kudos to the parents for allowing their boys to say goodbye in such a meaningful way. 

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'Grief is a lifetime process': American military widows unite to face their loss - The Guardian

'Grief is a lifetime process': American military widows unite to face their loss - The Guardian | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Taryn Davis hit an ‘all-time low’ after her husband’s death in Iraq, and now her American Widow Project helps others face the same devastation
Judith van Praag's insight:

A book for military widows will be most welcome. 

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Call for Grief Writing

Call for Grief Writing | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Click to view the prizes and the judges Click here to enter the competition Click here to download a poster for your noticeboard
Judith van Praag's insight:

Poets and writers, submit your grief writing for this anthology!

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Judith van Praag's curator insight, March 21, 11:29 PM

A writing contest for inclusion in an anthology on grieve. 

♥ princess leia ♥'s curator insight, May 3, 6:03 PM

Grief 

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MoMA | Jean Dubuffet: Memories from Nature

MoMA | Jean Dubuffet: Memories from Nature | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
MoMA | Jean Dubuffet: Memories from Nature
Judith van Praag's insight:

Not quite a site on mourning and grief, but working with leaves and creating monoprints can be a Creative Act of Healing.

 

Creating memorial prints, incorporating thoughts, combining imprints made by lost loved ones, eternalizing moments in time soothes our mind and provides solace. The making and the —made to remember—   leading to mementoes we cherish. 

Visit the site, read about Dubuffet and embark on an adventure. Bring together people of all ages for creative acts of healing. 

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How to Recognize Complicated Grief | The Center for Complicated Grief

Judith van Praag's insight:

Sometimes people say of their relationship that it is complicated. 

Complicated grief is not just complicated. 

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Special Concert: "Kaddish - I am Here" - YouTube

On September 8, 2011, a unique concert featuring the stirring words of Holocaust survivors, performed by the Jerusalem Symphony Orchestra - IBA, soloists and...
Judith van Praag's insight:

Kaddish is the prayer for the living.

Hearing a gazzan or cantor, or the rabbi sing brings solace to the mourners.


This haunting modern piece is too much for me, now.

Perhaps another day. 

 

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Life-affirming observations from Holocaust survivors’ offspring - Books

Life-affirming observations from Holocaust survivors’ offspring - Books | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
A collection of essays by a gamut of successful second- and third-generation survivors proves surprisingly uplifting
Judith van Praag's insight:

Yes, an article about the way children of Holocaust survivors have dealt with their parents' experience belongs under the tab Mourning & Griefwork World Wide.


Someone asked me recently whether I knew any 2G people growing up in the Netherlands. Well, yes, at the time every Jew was a survivor or a chid of survivors. All my friends were either survivors or 2G.

 

Within that group there were those who seemed less affected by the Shoah, and were able to focus better on their work and career than others. 

 

Couldn't that just be a matter of personality, you wonder. The way not all people are cut out to take on the presidency of a country, while others thrive on leadership? 

 

As Marisa Fox-Bevilacqua writes in her article, editor Menachem Rosensaft,  founding chairman of the International Network of Children of Jewish Survivors limited his authors to noteworthy figures in their respective fields.


Thus he was able to present the upside of this heavy heritage, how it can be a catalyst instead of a yoke.

Duh!

Of course the stories of SUCCESSFUL 2G and 3G will be uplifting.

 

“The overwhelming majority of contributors to this book had the benefit of parents who did not overburden their children with trauma,” says Rosensaft, whose own mother was a distinguished figure during and after the Holocaust, saving lives as a doctor in Auschwitz and serving as a principal witness in one of the first post-war tribunals against Nazi war criminals.

“If you grew up in a home in which the Holocaust was presented not as an all-enveloping trauma, but rather as ‘this is what it was, and this is what we did, and this is who I was before, during and after,’ then you better integrate it and draw strength from it as opposed to being suffocated by it.”

 

What am I trying to say? What do you say?

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Storycorps: Grief in the Digital Age

Storycorps: Grief in the Digital Age | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Here at Qeepr, we take the mission of Storycorps to heart. We both believe that everyone's story matters, we both want to collect and archive the things that people find important and we both believe that digital technology is the best way to keep memories alive for future generations. Sto
Judith van Praag's insight:

The mores of old regarding grief and mourning have all but disappeared in today's society. Often it's up to the mourners to educate those around them. But what do they know?

Animation films such as the one we link to above reach a scala of viewers, animated stories speak to so many. Who hasn't watched the elderly couple, intrigued by their voices, they're exciting even in old age, they ARE storytellers, and who won't listen and watch what happens next.

 

These moving images truly bring stories about death, and dying to life.

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'Exposure Therapy' May Relieve Prolonged Grief Disorder - HealthDay

'Exposure Therapy' May Relieve Prolonged Grief Disorder - HealthDay | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Reliving the death of a loved one can help survivors, researchers say
Judith van Praag's insight:

When does grief become a disorder? We will always grief the death of a lost loved one. With each year that passes the pain may be less sharp, but each year there may also be another element of loss. Not seeing your own child grow up means that you miss out on graduations and other milestones your child would have passed. Each time that happens, you may feel a pang of loss, and sadness may be yours, again. That's only normal, and to be expected. Still, if you grief deeply and that deep grief doesn't get any less, you may be suffering from prolonged or complicated grief. If that's the case, you may need professional help. 

Remember, therapy will not make you forget your loved one, therapy can help you deal with your loss, give a place to your loss in your life. 

 

"We need not walk alone." ~ The Compassionate Friends.

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The photo of a lifetime

The photo of a lifetime | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Many photographers have taken it upon themselves to document stillborn and terminal babies' precious moments after birth.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Photographer Todd Hochberg and I presented back to back at an ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling) Conference in 2000. We entered the field of death and dying each for different reasons, but both with the same objective, to offer solace and help people remember short lives that makes such great impressions. Kudos to Todd for continuing to bare witness and create a tangible memory, an image to behold and stroke. For that's what we do.

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Doris Salcedo Memorializes Murder Victims - Exquisite Mourning

Doris Salcedo Memorializes Murder Victims - Exquisite Mourning | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
The artist, who grew up in Colombia during an era when civic murder was a way of life, has made brutal memories the essence of a witnessing art.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Art does not give answers, only poses questions. ~ Doris Salcedo

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Poetry Kept Patient Alive - Doctor Writes Tribute Poem

Poetry Kept Patient Alive - Doctor Writes Tribute Poem | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
It soothed. It agitated. It connected him to others.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Grieving psycho therapist finds twinkle in patient's difficult life.

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Technology And Grief

Technology And Grief | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
ace to face, people didn't seem to know what to say.
Judith van Praag's insight:

The Facebook page of a deceased friend provides solace for his sons, relatives and friends. Even three years after his death we meet one another there, looking at old pictures, remember him on his birthday. In contrast, the deactivated Facebook page of a poet friend leaves us, her virtual friends at a loss. 

There's definitely something to say for keeping the virtual gathering place accessible after the death of the account holder.

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Does social media also give us a fear of missing out ... on grief? - The Guardian

Does social media also give us a fear of missing out ... on grief? - The Guardian | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
When everyone else is grieving a public figure, maybe it’s OK if you don’t experience the same sadness as your friends. Maybe it’s educational
Judith van Praag's insight:

The death of a public figure can give us a reason to mourn our own losses in public. If we don't feel the need to do so, that's fine. I bet that many readers have gone through similar experiences as the writer of this piece, and that's all right. 

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French Hair Art & The Industry and Art of Mourning

French Hair Art & The Industry and Art of Mourning | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
A little Friday morning mourning art for #heathens @SalemWGNA from the @ArtOfMourning http://t.co/d9x0r0hLvV http://t.co/qBjE0b17jC
Judith van Praag's insight:

The European examples make me think of hair mourning art pieces we saw at a museum in Baker City, Oregon. Until then the only use of human hair, retrieved from brushes and after shampooing that I was familiar with, was stuffing pin cushions. 

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Wim Brands Interviews René Gude

Wim Brands Interviews René Gude | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Twee gesprekken van Wim Brands met René Gude over ‘leven met de dood’. Wat wil je nalaten aan je nabestaanden? Waar gaat het om in het leven? Hoe valt er te leven met een aangezegde dood?
Judith van Praag's insight:

The ethicist, the official Thinker of the Netherlands, philosopher René Gude died a few days ago. In this interview he talks about his attitude towards impending death, about never having talked more, shared more thoughts since he wrote his "Last Words" column for the national Dutch daily NRC.

Contrary to Armstrong, he doesn't deny the prognosis, and his death, he acknowledges his fate while working harder than ever before. Not because he's in denial about his situation, but because he was so wanted, and so eager to stay in contact with other people. 

Instead of saying goodbye, he lives, he lived, and now lives on in all he offered to us.

 

Skepticism: Learn to be open to the undetermined.

Stoicism: Don't give rational meaning to emotions, just let them come (like ebb and tide of a wave) and be. 

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Henryk Górecki - Symphony No. 3 of "Sorrowful Songs" | Dawn Upshaw. London Sinfonietta, David Zinman - YouTube

Henryk Mikołaj Górecki (1933-2010). Symphony Nº 3, Op. 36, "The Symphony of Sorrowful Songs", 1976. Video Performance and Documentary: http://youtu.be/dp7ij5...
Judith van Praag's insight:

Play this when you're tired of Mozart's requiem. 

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World War I soldier’s room untouched for almost 100 years

World War I soldier’s room untouched for almost 100 years | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
He died almost a century ago, but his boots remain.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Good Grief!

Double innuendo intended. 

Imagine this.

The new owners, each new set of new owners who bought the house during the last century, had to keep the room as it was when the parents received word that their son was killed in action. 

 

Were they were among the fortunate ones, those who actually saw their boy's body returned to them? Or did they obtain uniform pieces, the coat, boots, and feathered cap later, to complete the image, to complete the memory, to complete history?

 

After WWI the intention was to give surviving loved ones something to go by, this was the first time in history that the grief of those who remained without any proof of what happened to their loved ones was acknowledged. You could say The Great War started good grief.

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Destruction and Repair: Art and Writings by Children of Survivors - Kasva Press

Destruction and Repair: Art and Writings by Children of Survivors - Kasva Press | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Kasva Press has been chosen to publish a unique compendium of essays, poetry, and paintings by the children and grandchildren of Holocaust survivors.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Here's an endeavor that resonates for me as a child of a survivor. Kudos to Chaya Rosen for spearheading this project.

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FUNERIA | Art honors life with unique artist-made cremation urns, original handmade keepsakes and beautiful funerary art

FUNERIA, artistic urns and custom urns. International funerary and personal memorial arts agency FUNERIA, along with its unique contemporary cremation urn gallery, Art Honors Life, is the pioneer and leading resource for original artist made urns, the founder of the respected Ashes to Art biennial urn competition and exhibition, and promotes and sells original urn designs, beautiful, handmade and finely crafted cremation urns and keepsakes in metal, wood, ceramics, biodegradable materials, crystal, glass, and innovative sculptural materials to retail customers, funeral homes and forward-thinking funeral service providers and cremation urn distribution channels throughout North America and worldwide.
Judith van Praag's insight:

Today I talked to a friend about the ashes of her cat. She thought to spread them, I suggested she could keep some separate, save them in a piece of jewelry, a crafted ceramic stone or closed vessel. Something she can touch and stroke. I thought of Funeria as a place to look, for inspiration, perhaps to find what's sought. 

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There's Nothing Wrong With You: On Lasting Grief and How We Deal With Death - Shedoesthecity

There's Nothing Wrong With You: On Lasting Grief and How We Deal With Death - Shedoesthecity | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
After a terrifyingly low period in my mental state over the past few months, I recently googled, “is it normal for grief to be worse in the second year after a death?
Judith van Praag's insight:

Our lost loves ones will always have a place in our hearts, and there are moments in time when sadness is triggered, even after deep grief has passed, after we no longer are in mourning. 

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EMDR Therapy helps relatives to handle murder | Psychology - Faculty of Behavioral and Social Sciences University of Groningen

EMDR Therapy helps relatives to handle murder | Psychology - Faculty of Behavioral and Social Sciences University of Groningen | Mourning & Griefwork Worldwide | Scoop.it
Therapie middels EMDR en CGT helpt nabestaanden moord te verwerken. #rouwverwerking #Ptss #EMDR #CGT
http://t.co/bBxtcm5VDc @univgroningen
Judith van Praag's insight:

Remaining loved ones and even friends and colleagues can benefit from therapy when someone has died, this is even more so after someone has been murdered.

 

EMDR goes a step further, it takes the edge of the pain so that you can think about your lost loved one, miss them, and honor them without having to suffer the recurring aggravated insult that thinking of death by murder triggers.

 

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