In 2011, the Dilbert cartoonist decided that it was time to confront his aversion to physical risk. What might some audacity and adventure bring? A few minor injuries, he reports, but also the pleasure of overcoming anxiety and apprehension.
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – Millions of Americans cheered the news on Friday that arrests had finally been made on Wall Street, but were soon disappointed to learn that the wrong people had been taken into custody.
The book Cannabis Chasidis: The Ancient and Emerging Torah of Drugs is an insightful, if puzzling, exploration of what Jewish sources think about drugs and chemical experimentation. The author, Yoseph Leib, hails from a traditional, observant Jewish background--but the wisdom given over in Cannabis Chasidis is anything but traditional.
Leib combines his own thoughts with ideas and quotes freely appropriated from Jewish texts and sages. He quotes Genesis, saying that God gave humanity "all seed-bearing plants for consumption" (1:29)--including, presumably, marijuana. And he retells Rabbi Nahman of Bratslav's admonition that each blade of grass "has its own song, its own power to heal, and its own angel, telling it to grow"--a testament, according to Leib, that even marijuana has a special "healing power."
Comparing moms to an octopus would be like pitting an army of savages against one well-oiled gatling gun sitting atop a hill. The mothers would charge the hill, hurling rocks and sticks; they'd roar righteous, compassionate battle cries of warriors who believe they are fighting for the betterment of humanity. They'd truly fight from the heart.
Meanwhile the gatling gun would rotate in a precise semicircle and mow them down like dogs.