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Herstory
History as this woman sees it. The serious, the kitsch, the opinionated. Companion to http://www.kitsch-slapped.com/
Curated by Deanna Dahlsad
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A Chilling, Terrifying Glimpse Inside The Mind Of A Woman Beater (VIDEO/IMAGES)

A Chilling, Terrifying Glimpse Inside The Mind Of A Woman Beater (VIDEO/IMAGES) | Herstory | Scoop.it
TRIGGER WARNING. THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS TEXT AND IMAGES THAT MAY BE HARMFUL TO SURVIVORS. A friend recently sent me a link to a TEDx video that features Leslie Morgan Steiner. Steiner is a Harvard graduate, former editor of Seventeen magazine, and a successful businesswoman. She is also a domestic violence survivor. The author of Crazy Love, Steiner busts…

Via Stalking Violates, Deanna Dahlsad
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Family Courts Helping Pedophiles, Batterers Get Child Custody

Family Courts Helping Pedophiles, Batterers Get Child Custody | Herstory | Scoop.it

Fathers Rights.Karen Anderson suspected that something strange was going on between her ex-husband, Rex Anderson, and their 15-year-old daughter. Prior to the couple's separation in 1998, the girl would sometimes...


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Scott Gibboney's curator insight, March 1, 6:44 AM

Have you ever noticed that county court houses are becoming wealthy at the expense of the most innocent. Check out what happened in Pennsylvania with a caper well known as " Kids For Cash " and I doubt much will change as the truth will most likely be drowned out by well paid lawyer ...may God have mercy.

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I'll Keep You In My Hoosegow, Valentine

I'll Keep You In My Hoosegow, Valentine | Herstory | Scoop.it
Isn't this a creepy, abusive-stalkery-type valentine? It takes the idea of a prisoner of your love to a whole new (low) level -- complete with gun! You're the one I've been looking for, My chase is...
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

See this mechanical card in action!

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Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, February 12, 12:28 PM

See this mechanical card in action!

Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, February 12, 12:29 PM

See this mechanical card in action!

Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, February 12, 12:34 PM

See this card in action!

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Bob Jones University Has Way Of Shutting That Year-Long Sex Abuse Study Down

Bob Jones University Has Way Of Shutting That Year-Long Sex Abuse Study Down | Herstory | Scoop.it
Bob Jones University shut down a yearlong investigation into sex abuse complaints before a final report came out. They had really good reasons, we’re sure.
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An Open Letter From Dylan Farrow

An Open Letter From Dylan Farrow | Herstory | Scoop.it
Dylan Farrow, Woody Allen’s adoptive daughter, speaks out about her experience.


For as long as I could remember, my father had been doing things to me that I didn’t like. I didn’t like how often he would take me away from my mom, siblings and friends to be alone with him. I didn’t like it when he would stick his thumb in my mouth. I didn’t like it when I had to get in bed with him under the sheets when he was in his underwear. I didn’t like it when he would place his head in my naked lap and breathe in and breathe out. I would hide under beds or lock myself in the bathroom to avoid these encounters, but he always found me. These things happened so often, so routinely, so skillfully hidden from a mother that would have protected me had she known, that I thought it was normal. I thought this was how fathers doted on their daughters. But what he did to me in the attic felt different. I couldn’t keep the secret anymore.

When I asked my mother if her dad did to her what Woody Allen did to me, I honestly did not know the answer. I also didn’t know the firestorm it would trigger. I didn’t know that my father would use his sexual relationship with my sister to cover up the abuse he inflicted on me. I didn’t know that he would accuse my mother of planting the abuse in my head and call her a liar for defending me. I didn’t know that I would be made to recount my story over and over again, to doctor after doctor, pushed to see if I’d admit I was lying as part of a legal battle I couldn’t possibly understand. At one point, my mother sat me down and told me that I wouldn’t be in trouble if I was lying – that I could take it all back. I couldn’t. It was all true. But sexual abuse claims against the powerful stall more easily. There were experts willing to attack my credibility. There were doctors willing to gaslight an abused child.

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Invisible Walls: How to Set Boundaries After Abuse

Invisible Walls: How to Set Boundaries After Abuse | Herstory | Scoop.it
When you’re depressed, anxious, abused, and/or have been isolated your whole life, it’s easy to feel like other people can’t really ever get close. Socializing is really hard for people who’ve had nothing but abuse. And we keep waiting for someone healthy to save us. But they can’t. So how can we fight this process and end the cycle? Well, there are three options that I’ve seen.

Via Laura Brown, Deanna Dahlsad
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Obama Tackles College Sex Assaults as Dad, President

Obama Tackles College Sex Assaults as Dad, President | Herstory | Scoop.it
For President Obama, combating sexual assault in the U.S., particularly in college communities, isn’t just part of his job as president. It’s also one of his top priorities as a dad.
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"Strong Women" Can Still Experience Violence

"Strong Women" Can Still Experience Violence | Herstory | Scoop.it

November is Prevention of Violence Against Women Month.

Trigger warning for discussion of intimate partner violence.


Perched on the bathtub’s porcelain edge, cradling the phone in my hand I could hear the voice of a disbelieving woman, her whispers barely audible. She was asking how, with a degree in Women Studies, with years of working in shelters and sexual assault centres, how could this be happening to her?

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Document the Abuse

Document the Abuse | Herstory | Scoop.it

Document the Abuse, Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit


Born out of the Stacy Peterson Case, the Evidentiary Abuse Affidavit (E.A.A.) was created for victims of domestic violence, to insure that the victim’s words about her fears and previous violence will not disappear if she does. The ability to prove who likely seriously injured, abducted, or killed someone is as only as good as the evidence. The E.A.A. was developed to assist victims in documenting their experiences in ways that will help the legal system successfully prosecute in the future.


Via Claudine Dombrowski
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Prison Guard Repeatedly Rapes Inmate; Warden Shrugs: 'Go on Birth Control,' Lawsuit Claims

Prison Guard Repeatedly Rapes Inmate; Warden Shrugs: 'Go on Birth Control,' Lawsuit Claims | Herstory | Scoop.it

An Alabama jail guard raped an inmate repeatedly, and the female warden told her there was nothing she could do about it - but put her on birth control, the woman claims in court.

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Why Domestic Violence Victims Fear Calling 911

Why Domestic Violence Victims Fear Calling 911 | Herstory | Scoop.it
What if getting help from the cops also meant you could get evicted?
That's the scary reality for numerous tenants across the country who live in municipalities with "nuisance property" ordinances, according to a new report by The New York Times.

Via J'nene Solidarity Kay
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Feminist Anxiety about Domestic Violence Against Men | The ...

Feminist Anxiety about Domestic Violence Against Men | The ... | Herstory | Scoop.it
The picture about women's capacity for violence changes when taking into account domestic violence in lesbian relationships, mother's physical abuse of their children, and women who commit sexual harassment in workplace.

Via JW, Deanna Dahlsad
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Penile Code Avenger: The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same: Let's Talk About Domestic Violence

Penile Code Avenger: The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same: Let's Talk About Domestic Violence | Herstory | Scoop.it

For today, we don't even have the right to enjoy our homes, our private spaces, without fearing violence, rape, or worse. And when we dare to point that out, we are not merely dismissed, we are punished.

So many of us are still having to say, "That's life."

Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

The history of domestic violence repeating itself.

 

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10 Signs You're In The Wrong Relationship

10 Signs You're In The Wrong Relationship | Herstory | Scoop.it
Let's face it: When we're newly coupled up, we tend to look at our partner -- and the budding relationship itself -- through a pair of proverbial rose-colored glasses.

Any flaws we detect in our partner are all too easily written off: He shies aw...
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

See also: 13 Signs You’re In A Toxic Relationship

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This 104-year-old started a secret women's shelter; help her change Alaska

This 104-year-old started a secret women's shelter; help her change Alaska | Herstory | Scoop.it
One of the cooler experiences I've had in recent memory was meeting Elsie Nanugaq Tommy, a spry 104-year-old who started a secret women's shelter decades ago out of her home in Newtok, Alaska. She's a bundle of smiles and optimism -- and her legacy of helpfulness already has been passed down to her granddaughter, Denise Tommy, who is executive director of the Tundra Women's Coalition in Bethel, Alaska, which shelters women and fights violence with educational programs.

Via Terrance H BoothSr
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Domestic Abuse Barbie Art Project Shows Realities Of Violence Against Women

Domestic Abuse Barbie Art Project Shows Realities Of Violence Against Women | Herstory | Scoop.it
Here's Barbie as you've never seen her before - as a model of domestic abuse. A student artist has painted black eyes, bruises and blood onto the perfect faces of the iconic dolls.

Via Dana Hoffman
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Longform Reprints: Death of a Playmate by Teresa Carpenter

Longform Reprints: Death of a Playmate by Teresa Carpenter | Herstory | Scoop.it
Dorothy Stratten was the focus of the dreams and ambitions of three men. One killed her.


“The major reason that I’m … that we’re both sittin’ here,” says Hefner, “that I wanted to talk about it, is because there is still a great tendency … for this thing to fall into the classic cliché of ‘smalltown girl comes to Playboy, comes to Hollywood, life in the fast lane,’ and that was somehow related to her death. And that is not what really happened. A very sick guy saw his meal ticket and his connection to power, whatever, slipping away. And it was that that made him kill her.”

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Mia's Story -- November 1992: Maureen Orth on Mia Farrow and Woody Allen

Mia's Story -- November 1992: Maureen Orth on Mia Farrow and Woody Allen | Herstory | Scoop.it
Whatever you already know about this tangled and painful situation, you’ve only heard half: the case against Mia Farrow. This is the other half and it isn’t any prettier. It concerns Woody Allen’s behavior and what it has done to Mia Farrow and the 11 children involved. The author breaks new ground on one of the year’s most shocking stories.
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This Intense Short Film About Sexual Abuse Will Destroy Your Silence Forever

In India, a woman is sexually assaulted every three minutes and raped every 20 minutes. However, many Indian women are afraid to speak up, fearing retribution from the very same monsters who abused them, and harsh judgement from an insensitive society.

 

A recent short film by Pooja Batura that’s making waves around the internet is telling them to do exactly the opposite. The film is simply titled “Bol” and captures the different kinds of sexual abuse an Indian woman suffers from during her lifetime, from child abuse to work place harassment to marital rape.  The message is clear and simple, “The more you talk, the less it will happen.”

 


Via Cindy Sullivan
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Arlene Drake's curator insight, January 26, 4:18 PM

This is an Outrage!  Speak up for  yourself, or Advocate for those who

Can't!!

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National report: Sexual assaults grossly underreported, police ill equipped to support victims

National report: Sexual assaults grossly underreported, police ill equipped to support victims | Herstory | Scoop.it
If the culture keep blaming victims, "we will continue to see rapes go unreported," said one expert
Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

What we know. But the next time some idiot tries to debate you...

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malek's comment, November 24, 2013 11:49 AM
Need a clear definition of sexual assault
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Just as women’s youth and physical attractiveness figure heavily in men’s initial mate preference, they also determine the intensity of effort men devote to holding on to her.

Just as women’s youth and physical attractiveness figure heavily in men’s initial mate preference, they also determine the intensity of effort men devote to holding on to her. | Herstory | Scoop.it

of [relationship] ‘vigilance’ include calling at unexpected times to see who s/he was with, having their friends check up on him/her, dropping by unexpectedly to see what s/he is doing, not letting s/he out of their site at a party. Examples of [relationship] violence include: hitting the [person] who made a pass at [their partner], slapping the [person] who made a pass a their partner, threatening their partner, and getting his/her friends to beat up the person who was interested in their partner.


Other tactics of ‘mate guarding’ include the ‘concealment of a mate’ (e.g., not taking them out to the party where other males/females will be present), ‘monopolizing of a mate’s time’ (e.g., spending all their free time with their partner so that they cannot meet anyone else), verbal threats, (e.g., threatening to break up with him/her if they ever cheat…), derogation of competition, (e.g., pointing out to their partner the other man/woman’s flaws), resource display, (e.g., buying them an expensive gift), appearance enhancement, (e.g., making themselves ‘extra attractive’ for their partner), sexual inducement, (e.g., performing sexual favors to keep their partner around), physical signs of possession, (e.g., holding their partner’s hand when other men/women are around), and possessive ornamentation, (e.g., asking their partner to wear a ring signifying that s/he is taken).


Men and women differ in how frequently they perform these mate-guarding tactics. Men are more likely than women to attempt to conceal their mates, use possessive markings, (e.g., asking her to wear his jacket), display resources, threaten rivals, and use physical violence toward rivals as tactics of mate guarding. Women are more likely than men to enhance their physical appearance and flirt with other men as tactics of mate guarding.


Our study of 107 newlywed married couples explored predictors of the intensity of effort a person allocated to mate guarding. Men married to young and physically attractive women, those high in reproductive value, mate-guarded them most intensely. These men were more likely than other men to conceal their mates, display emotional outbursts at the slightest signals of infidelity, and threaten other men with violence. Examples of the specific actions these men performed include:


(1) Refusing to take her to the party where other men were present, (2) Insisting that she spend all her free time with him, (3) Yelling at her for talking to another man, (4) Telling her that he would die if she ever left him, (5) Derogating the other man’s intelligence, (6) Staring coldly at the other guy who was looking at her.


Just as women’s youth and physical attractiveness figure heavily in men’s initial mate preference, they also determine the intensity of effort men devote to holding on to her.


Buss, David. "The Murderer Next Door: Why The Mind Is Designed To Kill." Penguin Press; New York, 2005. (p. 146 - 147)

Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

Book here: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002IEUVBY/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B002IEUVBY&linkCode=as2&tag=glamkitllc-20

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On This Day In History, We Ought To Be Reminded

On This Day In History, We Ought To Be Reminded | Herstory | Scoop.it

On this date, November 6th, in 1967 a baby girl was born; just 21 years later, on July 18, 1989, she would be murdered.

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Deanna Dahlsad's curator insight, November 6, 2013 6:49 AM

Remembering -- and honoring -- Rebecca Schaeffer. Be an action figure!

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Brina | 'I'm Not a Monster': What Ariel Castro's Testimony Teaches Us About Rape Culture

Brina | 'I'm Not a Monster': What Ariel Castro's Testimony Teaches Us About Rape Culture | Herstory | Scoop.it

When Castro states that the women he kidnapped were not virgins before he raped them, he is implying that their status is somehow lessened because of this. He’s trying to say that because these women had previously engaged in sexual relationships (god forbid!) their value isn’t as important as women who are virgins.

Deanna Dahlsad's insight:

Moving. Read it all.

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Domestic Violence Permission Slips

Domestic Violence Permission Slips | Herstory | Scoop.it

We, as a society, give many permission slips to abusers, excusing their abuse, violence & control with claims of “understandable stressors.” Perhaps no category of these permission slips is larger, more pervasive, than the economical permission slips.

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Download These Slides and Take Your Picture with...

Download These Slides and Take Your Picture with... | Herstory | Scoop.it
Download These Slides and Take Your Picture with Them To Help Raise Awareness
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