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I Don't Feel Your Pain: Overcoming Roadblocks to Empathy

I Don't Feel Your Pain: Overcoming Roadblocks to Empathy | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Why empathy is import at home and work and how to be better at it.

 

Neuroscientists have recently discovered that humans are wired to experience empathy through multiple systems of mirror neurons in our brains. These mirror neurons reflect back actions that we observe in others causing us to mimic that action in our own brains.  When we observe someone in pain or when we are with someone happy, we experience that to a certain extent. These mirror neurons are the primary physiological basis of empathy. They create a neural Wi-Fi that connects us to the feelings of people around us. 

 

Many people seem to be naturally empathetic. Others are not.  The good news is that research shows that empathy can be learned. There are however a few potential roadblocks to empathy that must be overcome.

 

by David F. Swink


Via Edwin Rutsch
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Did you know that the training for negotiating with hostage-takers includes "faking" empathy--and that those being trained actually come to feel some empathy for someone they despise?  Good article about how we can learn to develop our empathy for improved relationships.

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Barbara Kerr's curator insight, March 10, 2013 2:56 PM

Did you know that those who negotiate with hostage-takers are trained to "fake" empathy?  Read more to see what happens!

The Writing Goddess's curator insight, March 12, 2013 10:01 AM

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Garth Sanginiti's curator insight, August 1, 2013 9:57 PM

Empathy is a key skill to dealing and interacting with people in a manner that produces positive outcome and builds healthy relationships.  The article does a good job explaining what emphathy is, as well as giving some tips to improve in this area.  It also includes facts to support the assertion that empathy matters at work, "Empathy is also important in the workplace. A study conducted by the Center for Creatively Leadership investigated 6,731 leaders from 38 countries. Their results reveal that empathy is positively related to job performance. The study concluded that managers who show more empathy toward direct reports are viewed as better performers in their job by their bosses."

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Emotional Intelligence Development
We're interested in information and research on Emotional Intelligence---how to assess it, why it is important, how to enhance it
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Social and Emotional Development

Social and Emotional Development | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Produced by NBC News, the Parent Toolkit will help you navigate your child's journey from pre-kindergarten through high school.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

This is an incredible resource for the parents of kids from pre-school through high school--on social and emotional learning at each stage.

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Emotional intelligence and your job - Dubuque Telegraph Herald

Emotional intelligence and your job - Dubuque Telegraph Herald | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Consider this scenario: Your computer locks up in the middle of an important project that is due to the president within the hour, and your manager has given you some changes that you must implement.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"People who have high emotional intelligence understand how they respond to various people and situations. They adapt well to stressful situations and consider what other people are feeling. They tend to connect well with others while recognizing how others perceive them."

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Don Says Childhood Counseling Will Curb Youthful Exuberance - AllAfrica.com

Don Says Childhood Counseling Will Curb Youthful Exuberance - AllAfrica.com | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
A professor of Counselling Psychology has called for the institution and further strengthening of counseling services in the educational system beginning from primary schools as way of addressing problems associated with unfocussed children who...
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"The lecturer advised that ensuring wellness in the nation must begin with ensuring wellness at the individual, in interpersonal relationships between two individuals and at the family and group levels, in the community and in the society."

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Teaching Kids Resilience Through Emotional Intelligence | Mindful

Teaching Kids Resilience Through Emotional Intelligence | Mindful | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Linda Lantieri on her mission to cultivate the inner lives of students, teachers, and schools..
Barbara Kerr's insight:
Lantern has developed a curriculum to help kids build resilience.
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» Powerful Questions to Inspire Positive Change - World of Psychology

» Powerful Questions to Inspire Positive Change - World of Psychology | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Good questions can be powerful in life-changing ways. They can spark exciting ideas and inventions.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

What if you made one small change?

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Lane4 - The importance of resilient learners for innovation

Lane4 - The importance of resilient learners for innovation | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Alison Maitland, Head of Product, explores the importance of a learning mindset and personal resilience in order to encourage innovation in your people. (How do a learning mindset and personal resilience contribute towards more innovation?
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Does personal resilience lead to innovation?  This author says yes. 

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Resilience: How to train a tougher mind

Resilience: How to train a tougher mind | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Can you learn to be mentally tougher? Emma Young investigates the science of mindfulness and other techniques promising to foster resilience.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"Through their research, Charney and Southwick have identified 10 psychological and social factors that they think make for stronger resilience, either alone or ideally in combination."

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Why Everyone Should Read Harry Potter

Why Everyone Should Read Harry Potter | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Tales of the young wizard instill empathy, a study finds
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Want to increase empathy?--Read novels!  "A study published last year in Science found that reading literary fiction, as opposed to popular fiction or nonfiction, results in keener social perception and increased empathy — empathy being defined more or less as the ability to alternate between different perspectives on a particular person or situation."

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The Importance of Self-Awareness, and How to Become More Self Aware

The Importance of Self-Awareness, and How to Become More Self Aware | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
They say the first step is admitting you have a problem, and that's true in every aspect of life. Self-awareness and introspection have the ring of of a self-help guru's empty promises, but they are the starting point that leads to every improvement.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

This article includes a link to a TED talk by researcher Daniel Kahneman on self-awareness and happiness--worth listening to in my opinion.

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Miguel A. de Jesus's curator insight, October 12, 4:53 PM

One of the most important things you can do for your own personal development is to become more consciously aware of who you are, and how you respond to your environment and circumstances.


Miguel

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Want Healthy Personal and Professional Relationships? It's All About Praise. | Big Think

Want Healthy Personal and Professional Relationships? It's All About Praise. | Big Think | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Understanding the importance of praise in our personal and professional lives means overcoming a blind spot in human psychology that is many tens of thousands of years in the making. 
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"Understanding the importance of praise in our personal and professional lives means overcoming a blind spot in human psychology that is many tens of thousands of years in the making."

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Great leaders inspire action by using emotional intelligence - Cleveland Jewish News

Great leaders inspire action by using emotional intelligence - Cleveland Jewish News | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Great leaders inspire action by using emotional intelligence Cleveland Jewish News These successful businessmen and women possess keen emotional intelligence and exhibit a gift for understanding the deeper psychological reasons as to why people...
Barbara Kerr's insight:

What do Martin Luther King Jr, the Wright Brothers, and Steve Jobs have in common?  Read what this author says about their emotional intelligence.

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Emotional intelligence: Why people get it wrong - The Economic Times

Emotional intelligence: Why people get it wrong - The Economic Times | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
There’s lots of confusion about what emotional intelligence actually is. Here’s a quick look at the concept.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

If you like infographics, this one on Emotional Intelligence is interesting.

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Emotional Quotient - the key to balanced leadership | HRZone

Emotional Quotient - the key to balanced leadership | HRZone | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Awareness and self-management are crucial to leadership success.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Self-awareness and self-management are two of the important aspects of Emotional Intelligence for leaders.

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Naida Culshaw - facilitator + business skills trainer + coach's curator insight, August 17, 10:31 AM

The ideal leader could be a combination of the best features of ‘generation grr’ and ‘generation zzz' with a heavy dose of emotional intelligence! 

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What is Your Best Possible Self?

What is Your Best Possible Self? | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Use this exercise to boost your hope and well-being.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

This is a quick exercise from the positive psychology viewpoint:  Imagine your best possible self . . .

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Emotional intelligence - Missoula Independent

Emotional intelligence - Missoula Independent | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
A dozen teenagers mill around a Willard School classroom, their desultory conversations drifting about like falling leaves. Large sheets of fabric printed with colorful peace-sign...
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Hip hop, poetry, teenagers, and emotional intelligence - What a great program for teens . . .

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Manage Your Energy, Not Your Time | positive ps...

Manage Your Energy, Not Your Time | positive ps... | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Business management magazine, blogs, case studies, articles, books, and webinars from Harvard Business Review, addressing today's topics and challenges in business management.
Barbara Kerr's insight:
Changing your daily habits can lead to greater energy and satisfaction.
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June | Study reveals features of resilience and thriving amongst high achievers | Loughborough University

June | Study reveals features of resilience and thriving amongst high achievers | Loughborough University | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Resilience leads to high performance

http://t.co/Ou6vpZ9d6h
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Thoughtful article on six "resilience qualities" in adults. 

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The Critical Importance of Kindness

The Critical Importance of Kindness | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Science says lasting relationships come down to—you guessed it—kindness and generosity. (Sociological reasoning intended for romantic relationships, but I think extends to all interpersonal connections.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"Being mean is the death knell of relationships. Kindness is the glue that holds relationships together."

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Miguel A. de Jesus's curator insight, October 12, 12:47 PM

This is an important aspect of self-awareness and self-development.

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A Simple Exercise to Increase Well-Being and Lower Depression from Martin Seligman, Founding Father of Positive Psychology

A Simple Exercise to Increase Well-Being and Lower Depression from Martin Seligman, Founding Father of Positive Psychology | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
You'll need pen, paper, and a silencer for cynicism.

"When [a man] has fair health, a fair fortune, a tidy conscience and a complete exem
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Here's how this great exercise begins:  "Close your eyes. Call up the face of someone still alive who years ago did something or said something that changed your life for the better. Someone who you never properly thanked; someone you could meet face-to-face next week. Got a face? "

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Self-Awareness: The First Step to Mastering EQ

Self-Awareness: The First Step to Mastering EQ | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Kit Prendergast challenges us to work on enhancing our SEI together by starting with our “self-awareness.”
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"Nothing can happen without strong self-awareness; we can’t manage our own behavior effectively at work, connect and communicate with our colleagues, or even build productive working relationships without self-awareness." 

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'The Village Effect' explores health benefits of face-to-face contact - CTV News

'The Village Effect' explores health benefits of face-to-face contact - CTV News | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
CTV News 'The Village Effect' explores health benefits of face-to-face contact CTV News In "The Village Effect" (Random House Canada), Canadian developmental psychologist Susan Pinker conducts an extensive exploration into the value of...
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"The Village Effect" is about the importance of connection--not by email, text, or phone--but face to face with family, neighbors, and friends.  Good food for thought . . .

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How To Use Mental Strength To Raise Emotional Intelligence

How To Use Mental Strength To Raise Emotional Intelligence | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
As an FBI agent, I was trained to size up a person with just a glance.
Barbara Kerr's insight:

Four good suggestions for building emotional intelligence . . .

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The hidden power of smiling

The hidden power of smiling | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Ron Gutman reviews a raft of studies about smiling, and reveals some surprising results. Did you know your smile can be a predictor of how long you'll live -- and that a simple smile has a measurable effect on your overall well-being? Prepare to flex a few facial muscles as you learn more about this evolutionarily contagious behavior.

Via Young Spirits
Barbara Kerr's insight:

If you just smile . . .

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Young Spirits's curator insight, August 27, 1:45 PM

Ron Gutman tells you why it's healthy to smile!

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Emotional Intelligence is Critical for Leaders to Make an Impact

It goes a long way in contract negotiations and terminations, in company celebrations and closed deals, and in building strong relationships and cementing your role as a leader.

Via Nick Musgrave
Barbara Kerr's insight:

In challenging situations such as contract negotiations and terminations, or even in positive cases such as company celebrations and closed deals, a high degree of EI can go a long way in building strong relationships and cementing your role as a strong leader.

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Barbara Kerr's curator insight, August 25, 12:50 PM

"In challenging situations such as contract negotiations and terminations, or even in positive cases such as company celebrations and closed deals, a high degree of EI can go a long way in building strong relationships and cementing your role as a strong leader."

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Emotional Intelligence for workplace leaders

Emotional Intelligence for workplace leaders | Emotional Intelligence Development | Scoop.it
Collective EI has an impact on the bottom-line and here s how to effectively build EI in your organization (Emotional Intelligence for workplace leaders http://t.co/V1lmBK6t3O)...
Barbara Kerr's insight:

"To be effective, leaders must have a solid understanding of how their emotions and actions affect the people around them. The better a leader relates to and works with others, the more successful he or she will be."

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