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Engaging Impasse

Engaging Impasse | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
welcome to www.engagingimpasse.org; outlines Circles of Contemplation and Dialogue project initiated by Nancy Sylvester, IHM; articles written by Nancy Sylvester, IHM on contemplation, mysticism, impasse, dialogue, globalization, new cosmology,...
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Creating a safe space to speak from the Heart. Non-violent Communication

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▶ Notre Dame - Perspective Reimagined - YouTube

The mind. It guides us. Leads us. Examines the world around us. In this spot airing during NBCSports' broadcasts of Notre Dame football games, iconic Univers...
Annette Schmeling's insight:

"When given the chance to examine things from different perspectives, the mind soars." 

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When The Media Treats White Suspects And Killers Better Than Black Victims

When The Media Treats White Suspects And Killers Better Than Black Victims | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
This pervasive and not-so-subtle media bias is right in front of your eyes....
Annette Schmeling's insight:

How quickly journalists move from reality and facts to labeling the experience. The Ladder of Inference is a good tool to describe the thinking process we usually go through to label an experience and get to a decision or action. 

 

Starting at the bottom of the ladder, we have reality and facts. From there, we:

* Experience these selectively based on our beliefs and prior experience.
* Interpret what they mean.
* Apply our existing assumptions, sometimes without considering them.
* Draw conclusions based on the interpreted facts and our assumptions.
* Develop beliefs based on these conclusions.
* Take actions that seem "right" because they are based on what we believe.

 

This can create a vicious circle. Our beliefs have a big effect on how we select from reality, and can lead us to ignore the true facts altogether. Soon we are literally jumping to conclusions – by missing facts and skipping steps in the reasoning process. Nick Wing illustrates the biases of the news media when addressing crime stories. He makes a compelling case for race based interpretations for crimes that have been committed. 

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What If Pope Francis Gave a Pro-Life Homily and No One Noticed? What If He Begged Us to Change Our Hearts and No One Listened?

What If Pope Francis Gave a Pro-Life Homily and No One Noticed? What If He Begged Us to Change Our Hearts and No One Listened? | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Annette Schmeling's insight:

"Pope Francis is an Ignatian spiritual director for the world, walking us through spiritual exercises, directing us to personal transformation, which could transform the world."

 

Kathryn Jean Lopez invites us to listen deeply and allow ourselves to be transformed by the Word of God - nothing is impossible with God. Francis reminds us of the urgent call to "keep hope alive in a world of violence, fragmentation and roundedness that threaten the survival of our pilot. The future of humanity depends on a spiritual rebirth." (Sacred Heart 2008 Chapter: Contemplation). 

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Do You Know How to Be a Good Listener?

Do You Know How to Be a Good Listener? | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
People think that when we hear, we listen. But listening is really hard work, and takes a lot of concentration. Here are 3 ways to become a better listener.


Do you ever feel like you’re speaking
and not being heard?

 

You know what I’m talking about:

You confide in a friend and she keeps checking her cell phone.You pitch an idea to a co-worker and he interrupts with his own idea.You tell your husband about your day and his eyes glaze over.


by DONNE DAVIS


Via Edwin Rutsch
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Are Your Beliefs Keeping You Stuck?

Are Your Beliefs Keeping You Stuck? | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Are the things you believe about yourself, others, and the world rooted in reality or do they only exist in your head? This is a question worth asking when you find yourself stuck.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Examining your beliefs and becoming aware of underlying assumptions is difficult. Beliefs by nature delude us into a view that 'this is the way that it is.' Michael Hyatt encourages us to examine our limiting beliefs about ourselves, others and the world in this blog post. Being aware of our beliefs and holding them up for examination cannot be done if we are defending our opinions. It is easier, and more comfortable, to move away from suspending judgments and holding onto rigid beliefs that we feel compelled to defend. The discipline of examining your beliefs will lead to more meaningful relationships.

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Great Leadership Requires Asking Questions

Great Leadership Requires Asking Questions | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it

Great leaders are those who instead ask the right questions and engage others to arrive at the best answers together.


Via donhornsby
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Effective questions are those that accomplish their purpose as well as build a positive relationships. Questions that work should build a deeper and better understanding of the problem and possible solutions, but should also construct better working relations among the problem solvers.  Edgar Schein in his book Humble Inquiry: The Gentle Art of Asking Instead of Telling promotes the kind of inquiry that comes from an attitude of interest and curiosity. Inviting others to tell their story in their own words helps to establish rapport, gather information and increase understanding.

 

Humble Inquiry changes the quality of listening from confirming habitual judgments and the focus on the factual/objective data to more empathic and generative listening (Otto Scharmer) and greater humility. My whole being is able to slow down and to be present when I can suspend my judgment and enter into the question at a deeper level. 

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donhornsby's curator insight, March 20, 10:10 AM

(From the article) “When a leader asks the questions,” says Wiseman, “they channel the energy and intelligence of their team on the challenge at hand, and they shift the burden of thinking onto others.”

 

Instead of looking to answer the big and important questions on his or her own, the multiplier asks provocative questions of the group and encourages them to work on it together. This engages employees like nothing else and no longer has them sitting on the sidelines awaiting the answer from their leader.

 

Ivon Prefontaine's curator insight, March 20, 12:59 PM

A key is when asking questions is to listen deeply. I read Parker Palmer and use his work in my writing. The key person to question and listen to is one's self. This requires quietness that we do not find in the hectic pace of daily life. It is a meditative space when we listen to our self and to others.

ozziegontang's curator insight, May 5, 5:00 AM

Lee would simply share: The role of the leader is to be a virtuoso question-asker.  Questions open. Answers close. 


Thanks to Annette Schmeling for sharing from Serving and Leadership.

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Capitalism 4.0 & Neuroplasticity of the Collective Brain

Capitalism 4.0 & Neuroplasticity of the Collective Brain | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
I have just returned from an interesting experience in Washington. D.C.: a panel discussion with His Holiness the Dalai Lama. The event was sponsored by the American Enterprise Institute (AEI), a leading neo-conservative think tank responsible for m...
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Advocating for people-centered economics and  a new type of leadership - 

"...the plasticity of the human brain is an unbelievable lever that points us to our ultimate leverage points as human beings: paying attention to our attention. It calls for a new type of leadership work that focuses on the cultivation of our inner instruments of knowing. But what would it mean to cultivate the neuroplasticity of the collective brain at the level of a whole system? That would seem to require a new type of leadership work that we all need to learn to engage in.

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ozziegontang's curator insight, March 4, 4:24 PM

Not much to add to Annette Schmeling's insights.

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Banished for Questioning the Gospel of Guns

Banished for Questioning the Gospel of Guns | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
A longtime columnist for a gun magazine questioned when the regulation of guns became infringement of the right to bear arms. He was quickly fired, squelching any debate.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Dick Metcalf invited a NYT reporter Ravi Somaiya to his home to engage in Dialogue. Metcalf despairs that the debate over gun policy in America is so bitterly polarized and dominated by extreme voices. In this case advertisers forced the hands of publishers to "excommunicate" Metcalf for straying from party line and exploring a different perspective. 

 

 

 

 

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Mark Nepo: How to Stay Present in a World of Distractions - Super Soul Sunday - OWN

Subscribe to OWN: http://bit.ly/18Lz0rV Poet and best-selling Mark Nepo says to listen to someone is to be truly present—but it's not always easy to do in a ...
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Mindless habits sap our energy, steal our time and clutter our life at home & work. It is the never-ending obsession with doing or being good enough. Mark Nepo and Oprah highlight, in the video clip, the limitations of the listening to the constant chatter of the inner critic, our distractions and busyness. Nepo stresses the need to develop the discipline and personal practice of presence.

 

Being fully present in the here and now creates greater peace, power and harmony. Presence and making genuine, loving contact is not always safe or easy. There is always a risk involved in trying to make a real connection. Being aware of our presence and making small adjustments in our mindless habits will help our lives flow more harmoniously according to our own nature and natural rhythms. 

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ozziegontang's curator insight, November 25, 2013 10:00 AM

As dear friend Annette Schmeling shares:


"Mindless habits sap our energy, steal our time and clutter our life at home & work. It is the never-ending obsession with doing or being good enough. Mark Nepo and Oprah highlight, in the video clip, the limitations of the listening to the constant chatter of the inner critic, our distractions and busyness. Nepo stresses the need to develop the discipline and personal practice of presence."

 

"Being fully present in the here and now creates greater peace, power and harmony. Presence and making genuine, loving contact is not always safe or easy. There is always a risk involved in trying to make a real connection. Being aware of our presence and making small adjustments in our mindless habits will help our lives flow more harmoniously according to our own nature and natural rhythms."


So I remind myself: Am I awake, aware, fully present and living my life intentionally?

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Can You Learn to Listen with Intercultural Ears and See with Intercultural Eyes?

Can You Learn to Listen with Intercultural Ears and See with Intercultural Eyes? | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Here I explore the act of listening from two perspectives, which are important to intercultural communication -- tone of voice and body language.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Sherwood Fleming highlights the challenges of socially constructed realities, where joint understandings of the world may not be shared by other cultures. Learning to listen, and to interpret content accurately, takes time & discipline. 

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David Hain's curator insight, October 27, 2013 2:57 AM

Great stuff on a key skill!

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CM150 Listening: Our Most Used Communications Skill | University of Missouri Extension

Annette Schmeling's insight:

"When you are listening to somebody, completely, attentively, then you are listening not only to the words, but also to the feeling of what is being conveyed, to the whole of it, not part of it." --J. Krishnamurti

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Leading From The Heart

Leading From The Heart | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
There is a right way and a wrong way to use the head as well as your heart in leadership.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Contemplative Dialogue is a way of being that asks that we take a long and loving look at the real. Chris Argyris, Peter Senge, et.al., have given us the Ladder of Inference, and other tools, to be awake and aware and to picture the dignity and worth of each person. Our growth is gauged entirely by our capacity to love and be loved.

As Susan states in this article, "Relationships are built based on respect, growth, cooperation and communication." She also highlights the value of compassion and truth. The emotional connection, and our willingness to be present to the whole person, affirms the sacred worth and value of each and every person.

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Time for another paradigm shift in policing | The Christian Century

Time for another paradigm shift in policing | The Christian Century | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
In the 19th century, the U.S. adopted a "social peacekeeper" model of policing. Then the Civil War left behind a surplus of firearms.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Tobias Winright provides a unique perspective on the situation in Ferguson, MO. As a former corrections and reserve police officer and now a theological ethicist, Winright (St. Louis University, Associate Professor of Christian Ethics) presents two polarities: a military model of policing and a social-peacekeeper model. Like all polarities, both perspectives reflect different points of view. Each view is correct,  and each point of view is made up of a value and fear combination. The stronger the emotional attachment to a position, or a value, the greater the fear is of its loss. 

 

Winright encourages us to explore policing in the United States today. He is courageous and his questions are not asked lightly in the heat of the situation in Ferguson. Winright shakes things up and invites us to explore the polarities and to break free of familiar thought patterns and easy assumptions. The time has come to begin a true dialogue; to explore our priorities, purpose and goals. 

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Using Dialogue Circles to Support Classroom Management

Using Dialogue Circles to Support Classroom Management | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
At Glenview Elementary School, dialogue circles are part of a program aimed at building collaboration, respect, and positive behavior among students.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Studies have found that Restorative Dialogue Circles have a powerful effect on children as both a form of discipline and as an opportunity for growth. Give students tools for creating and maintaining community and provide a different model for dealing with conflict in peaceful and creative ways.  Congratulations Glenview Elementary School1

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Ivon Prefontaine's curator insight, August 1, 5:56 PM

Dialogue circles which genuinely engage students and open up communication are incredible. The key is setting respectful parameters in which people can authentically communicate and be safe in doing so. This is about being and becoming people and not doing learning.

 

@ivon_ehd1

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The Neurochemistry of Positive Conversations

The Neurochemistry of Positive Conversations | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
And what managers need to know about negative ones.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Being mindful of communication style and the neurochemistry of positive conversations will bring more kindness, compassion and resilience into our world. Judith & Richard Glasser provide thought-provoking research and confirms the power of oxytocin.

 

 

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Pope Francis Urges More Interreligious Dialogue

Pope Francis Urges More Interreligious Dialogue | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Pope Francis called for intense discourse with Islam and urged church leaders to renew dialogue with countries that do not have official ties with the Holy See.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

“My wish is that the dialogue between us should help to build bridges connecting all people, in such a way that everyone can see in the other not an enemy, not a rival, but a brother or sister to be welcomed and embraced." (Pope Francis)

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How To Stay Sane: The Art of Revising Your Inner Storytelling

How To Stay Sane: The Art of Revising Your Inner Storytelling | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
"Our stories give shape to our inchoate, disparate, fleeting impressions of everyday life."

"I pray to Jesus to preserve my sanity," Jack
Annette Schmeling's insight:

There is an underlying pattern of thoughts that goes on around you everyday. When we are aware of the underlying patterns and consciously choose to be in the present moment with others, we let go of our internal dialogue and the inner stories. Unresolved fear, anger & grief limits our capacity to listen and to be heard. You can't deal well with a situation if you are anxious, scared or angry. Awareness of this distinction between the "historical truth" and "narrative truth" dissolves misunderstanding and empowers others to show up and be present. Once we name our "narrative truth" we can learn to be with, accept and quiet the mental and emotional charges that keep us separate from others. 

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From fear to calm | The Christian Century

From fear to calm | The Christian Century | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
These Gospel stories can seem so familiar. But sit with the disciples in the little wooden boat, and Jesus' power will render you speechless.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

James Martin demonstrates the art of suspending judgment and being an open-minded listener through the use of Ignatian prayer.  Bringing an open, moment-to-moment, nonjudgmental awareness to the reading allows for a more penetrative awareness that sees beyond the surface of what is going on in the story. The classic Ignatian contemplation makes it possible to see connections that may not have been visible before. 

 

Suspending judgment is a deep practice that is hard to learn and hard to maintain. In our busyness we tend to get ahead of our being, and we tend to force premature frames and conclusions on what we see. 

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Uncovering The Blind Spot of Leadership, by C. Otto Scharmer

Uncovering The Blind Spot of Leadership, by C. Otto Scharmer | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Why do many of our attempts to address the challenges of our times fail? This article presents the view that two leaders in the same environment acting in the same way can bring about completely different outcomes depending on the inner place from which each operates. We know very little about this inner dimension and this lack of knowledge constitutes a blind spot in our approach to leadership and management. This article sheds light on the inner dimension of leadership and presents seven leadership capacities to develop in order to become a more effective leader. Profound change today not only requires a shift of the mind, it requires a shift of the will and a shift of the heart.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Otto Scharmer provides a strategy to to be free of personal preferences, superfluous attachments, and preformed opinions. Effective leaders, argues Scharmer, have the interior disposition and interior freedom necessary to access intention and see the emerging whole. 

P.S. Scharmer would have made a great Jesuit!

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ozziegontang's curator insight, March 12, 10:47 AM

Psychologist Dorothy Mitchell shared a small bright yellow card that resides on hundreds and hundreds of bathroom and bedroom mirrors around the world stating: You are looking at the face of the person who is responsible for your happiness.  For Lee Thayer: If it's to be it's up to me.  The first person to lead is myself.

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From piety to politics: The evolution of an American sister

From piety to politics: The evolution of an American sister | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Annette Schmeling's insight:

A wonderful account of a sister who has lived through the changes of religious life in the United States for over 50 years.  Nancy Sylvester is the founder of the Institute of Communal Contemplation and Dialogue (http://www.iccdinstitute.org) and actively seeking new ways to engage impasse in an age of uncertainty.

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The pioneering thinking of Chris Argyris - FT.com

The pioneering thinking of Chris Argyris - FT.com | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
No one in my life has taught me more about the world, about people and about success than my parents did. But Chris Argyris, renowned in business education as a leading professor at Harvard, comes close.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

I would add my appreciation for Argyris' practical application and the focus on learning opportunities. Double-Loop Learning, Ladder of Inference, Espoused vs Lived experience and the balance between Inquiry and Advocacy are concepts that are regularly used in the practice on Contemplative Dialogue.

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ozziegontang's curator insight, November 25, 2013 9:32 AM

Again, like many, influenced by his thinking on thinking.

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Discover Your Deepest-Held Belief - @OWNTV #Lifeclass

Discover Your Deepest-Held Belief - @OWNTV #Lifeclass | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Mark Nepo, one of Oprah's favorite poets, explains why it's important to find the vitality that brings you alive.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

There is no greater gift that we can give another than to affirm their deepest desire. First we must find that still quiet voice.

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Radical Listening – 6 Strategies For Deeper Connections - Goodlife Zen

Radical Listening – 6 Strategies For Deeper Connections - Goodlife Zen | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it

"Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much. -Robert Greenleaf

 

In a recent post, we talked about why you might be undervaluing your listening skills, and how that’s costing you.

In this post, I’ll share some helpful techniques to improve your listening ability.

But before you keep reading, check yourself: how important is listening to you, really?"


Via Brad Abbott, David Hain
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John Michel's curator insight, June 9, 2013 8:11 AM

One of the biggest reasons people don’t listen is that they don’t think it’s important. Unless you decide listening matters for your life, you probably won’t be willing to do the hard work that this post is going to ask of you.

Carolyn Williams's curator insight, June 9, 2013 3:44 PM

Listen and learn ~ great things happen when you hear the message ~ http://www.lifestyle-online.co.uk/blog/2013/02/listen-and-learn/

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When the Voice Inside Your Head Turns Bad.....

When the Voice Inside Your Head Turns Bad..... | Contemplative Dialogue | Scoop.it
Empowering yourself to challenge your inner critic.
Annette Schmeling's insight:

Another framework to look at our Ladder of Inference. The inner critic continually gathers data, jumps to conclusions and forms perceptions that are hard-wired and serve as our filters for all future interactions. Schema Therapy can give the inner critic a much-needed vacation. 

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