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Marshall Rosenberg Interview - CNVC.org

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Authentic Dialogue
Develop compassionate and effective relationships with significant people in your life.
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Five things you may not know about empathy

Five things you may not know about empathy | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

Can you feel that? It's called empathy and it's having a moment. Experts have discovered that putting yourself in someone else's shoes is not just an important life skill, it's also intrinsic to happiness.Author Brene Brown calls empathy a 'sacred space' where you climb down into another person's hurt.

 

This is crucial because it fosters connection – something sympathy alone can't do. If that seems a little touchy-feely, stay with me, because the virtue traditionally associated with shoulder squeezes and self-sacrifice is more powerful – and surprising - than you think.

 

Empathy helps you get ahead at work 

by Natalie Reilly

 


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How to Criticize with Kindness: Philosopher Daniel Dennett on the Four Steps to Arguing Intelligently

How to Criticize with Kindness: Philosopher Daniel Dennett on the Four Steps to Arguing Intelligently | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
"Just how charitable are you supposed to be when criticizing the views of an opponent?"

"In disputes upon moral or scientific points," Ar
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Five ways to foster empathy

Five ways to foster empathy | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

No matter what our capacity for empathy, when we become angry and defensive, our ability to empathise becomes limited. 5 ways to foster empathy in your relationship:

Give your partner genuine attention. Try hard not to focus on yourself or your feelings - or a need to defend yourself - whilst they are talking.

 

Someone has to go first. For empathy to work it has to flow both ways. Be the bigger person and do the giving first so that you in turn can receive.

 

You don't have to fix it. Often experiencing empathy can be confused with fixing the problem your partner feels. What your partner needs is that you hear them - not that you sort it all out.

 

You can get it wrong without it being the end of the world. The main point is you are trying - this is what matters.

 

Listening is not enough. We also need to make ourselves vulnerable by having the capacity to remove our mask and reveal our feelings.

 

Be compassionate to yourself too...

Jill Goldson


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Why Are Humans Violent? The Psychological Reason We Hurt Each Other

Why Are Humans Violent? The Psychological Reason We Hurt Each Other | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
From the crises in the Middle East to mass shootings in U.S. schools to the reckless striving for wealth and world domination, there is one overarching theme that almost never gets media...
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How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? Here’s How To Tell

How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? Here’s How To Tell | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
Here are 14 signs you have high emotional intelligence.
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Think Empathy's Just a Nice Idea? Think Again...

Think Empathy's Just a Nice Idea? Think Again... | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
Empathy In Action: How a Concept is Making Real Change In the World




The world can be a scary and confusing place when you're a kid, even if you're one of the lucky ones and have every imaginable amenity at your disposal. Even the most fortunate c...
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Six Habits of Highly Empathic People

Six Habits of Highly Empathic People | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
We can cultivate empathy throughout our lives, says Roman Krznaric—and use it as a radical force for social transformation.
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The Neurobiology of “We”. Relationship is the flow of energy and information between people

The Neurobiology of “We”. Relationship is the flow of energy and information between people | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

The Neurobiology of “We”. Relationship is the flow of energy and information between people, essential in our development.
"The study of neuroplasticity is changing the way scientists think about the...

 

“Relationship is key,” he emphasizes. “When we work with relationship, we work with brain structure. Relationship stimulates us and is essential in our development. People rarely mention relationship in brain studies, but it provides vital input to the brain.

 

==========================

Relationship stimulates us and is

essential in our development.

People rarely mention relationship

in brain studies, but it provides

vital input to the brain.

===============

 

Every form of psychotherapy that works, works because it creates healthier brain function and structure.… In approaching our lives, we can ask where do we experience the chaos or rigidity that reveal where integration is impaired.

 

We can then use the focus of our attention to integrate both our brain and our relationships. Ultimately we can learn to be open in an authentic way to others, and to ourselves.

 

The outcome of such an integrative presence is not only a sense of deep well-being and compassion for ourselves and others, but also an opening of the doors of awareness to a sense of the interdependence of everything. ‘We’ are indeed a part of an interconnected whole.””

 

by Patty de Llosa


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Ruth Obadia's curator insight, October 7, 2013 6:04 AM


“We is what me is!”

Eli Levine's curator insight, February 12, 2014 11:34 PM

The network of "I" is connected to the network that is "us" in an upward gradient.

 

There can be no full "I" without "we", because all humans have to be socialized, like any other social animal, in order to develop fully as individual human beings.

 

We are all connected to one another and the environment to form one web on this planet.  It affects us and we affect it, sometimes for good, sometimes for bad, depending upon what we do to it consciously and subconsciously.

 

Why listen to the individualists who have absolutely no sense or desire to connect with the other that is around them and that has helped form them as individuals, psychologically, physically and socially?

 

They are not in touch with the actual world, and are probably just of a pathological mindset that, I think, needs to be treated as a disease by our society.

 

We are all one.

 

What you do effects all those who are around you and are connected to you.

 

And, most importantly, what you do to them/it is the same thing that you do to yourself, as an individual.

 

Think about it.

 

Libertarians.

 

Conservatives.

 

Think about it.

LUZ DEL MAR's curator insight, August 25, 2014 8:57 PM

mente - cerebro- relaciones

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Your most important skill: Empathy - Chad Fowler

Your most important skill: Empathy - Chad Fowler | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

 Empathy is the most important skill you can practice. It will lead to greater success personally and professionally and will allow you to

 

Why practice empathy?

Why should you explicitly work to enhance your ability to empathize with others?

 

You will be more likely to treat the people you care about the way they wish you would treat them.

 

You will better understand the needs of people around you.

 

You will more clearly understand the perception you create in others with your words and actions.

 

You will understand the unspoken parts of your communication with others.

 

You will better understand the needs of your customers at work.

 

You will have less trouble dealing with interpersonal conflict both at home and at work.

 

You will be able to more accurately predict the actions and reactions of people you interact with.You will learn how to motivate the people around you.

 

You will more effectively convince others of your point of view.

 

You will experience the world in higher resolution as you perceive through not only your perspective but the perspectives of those around you.

 

You will find it easier to deal with the negativity of others if you can better understand their motivations and fears.

 

Lately when I find myself personally struggling with someone, I remind myself to empathize and I immediately calm myself and accept the situation for what it is.

Chad Fowler


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RSA Shorts - The Power of Empathy

What is the best way to ease someone's pain and suffering? In this beautifully animated RSA Short, Dr Brené Brown reminds us that we can only create a genuin...
Jean-Philippe Bouchard's insight:

I love Brené Brown! Cleare, precise, compelling!

Plus she uses the exact same definition of empathy that we use in Nonvient Communication (NVC). 

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The 5 Habits of an Empathetic Communicator

The 5 Habits of an Empathetic Communicator | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
How we respond to others is largely a function of habit. Many small, repetitive, automatic responses that grow over a long period of time form habits. Mostly, these reactions are outside of our con...
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Five Expressions of Empathy

Five Expressions of Empathy | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

I use the word "empathy" a lot when I'm talking about parenting. Sometimes I forget it might not be entirely clear exactly what is meant by using empathy when communicating with children...

 

Here are five things you can do that will help you respond to a hurting child with empathy:

 

1. Take your child’s perspective. See the world through his eyes. His problems might seem trivial to you, but try to see them as he does. Broken crayons, lost toys, stuck zippers, or nightly clean-up time mean more to your child in his world than they do to you in yours.

 

2. Refrain from judgment. Yes, you may disagree with your child. You may think she was “wrong” for what she did, said, or felt during the conflict she had at school that day, but put that aside for now. Your child doesn’t need your judgment, she needs to be able to impart her own judgment. Help her do that by focusing on her feelings regarding what happened.

 

3. Communicate your understanding of your child’s feelings. 

4. Stop before you say BUT. ..

5. Instead, try AND...


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Why Self-Compassion Helps You Meet Life's Challenges

Why Self-Compassion Helps You Meet Life's Challenges | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

Do you regularly try to motivate yourself with self-criticism and mental projections about all the bad things that will happen to you if you don’t get it together? While this approach may create that extra surge of adrenaline to meet your work deadline, cold call the next potential client, get to the gym, or get your house cleaned before the in-laws visit, it comes at a cost. You end up feeling bad about yourself a lot of the time. 

 

You get into constant “fight or flight” mode, trying to avoid the negative imagined consequences, which messes with your cortisol and other stress hormones. You get overwhelmed, and decide to zone out playing video games or posting mindlessly on social media, or you rebel and eat, drink, or spend too much, thus creating more self-disgust. If this sounds familiar, perhaps you need a healthy dose of self-compassion.

 

by Melanie Greenberg, Ph.D.


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Barbara Kerr's curator insight, October 6, 2013 4:20 PM

Having compassion for yourself is a necessary step not only for your own well-being but also for those you care for..

Glori R Zeltzer, MFT's curator insight, October 18, 2013 1:34 PM

When we show ourselves love, we blossom, just as children and our gardens do.

Electrovista's curator insight, December 4, 2013 6:15 AM

From the author: "...you need a healthy dose of self-compassion."

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Carl Rogers on Empathy and Presence

Presentations at CarlRogers.info: New World / New Person Pt. 1 2/22/81
Full audio at: http://carlrogers.info/audio.html
More on Rogers and Empathy at: http://j.mp/V88gdn

Starts talking about empathy and empathic listening at 40:30, discusses presence from 42:00 to end.
Transcript:
"You've heard much in this conference about the skill of empathic listening. I simply want to underscore what has been said because I believe that it plays a large part in our future. I come to believe that a very sensitive listening is one of the most powerful forces for growth that I know.

When I can let myself enter softly and delicately, the vulnerable inner world of the other person.
When I can temporarily lay aside my views and values and prejudices.
When I can let myself be at home in the fright, the concern, the pain, the anger, the tenderness, the confusion, which fills his or her life.
When I can move about in that inner world without making judgments,.
When I can see that world with fresh unfrightened eyes.
When I can check the accuracy of my sensing's with him or her being guided by the responses I receive.

Then I can be a companion to that inner person, pointing to the felt meanings of what is being experienced. Then I find myself to be a true helper, a welcome companion, and aid to growth and help.

 

Listening seems such a easy word, I find it a lifetime task to achieve true listening and a task well worth the effort.

There is another very subtle factor in the healing relationship which I have experienced and that I would call presence. It is certainly known to physicians. ..... I to have experienced this. When I am at my best as a group facilitator, or a therapist, I discover this characteristic. I find that when I am closest to my inner intuitive self, when I am somehow in touch with the unknown in me, when perhaps I am in a slightly altered state of consciousness, then what ever I do seems to be full of healing. Then simply my presence is releasing and helpful....


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celine levita's curator insight, February 3, 11:49 AM

"Listening seems such a easy word, I find it a lifetime task to achieve true listening and a task well worth the effort." C Rogers.

L'écoute : une compétence à cultiver encore et encore

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The Basics of Non Violent Communication

The Basics of Non Violent Communication | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
The challenges that arise in our communication with each other seem to be rooted in the way we choose to communicate our feelings and needs to others, but
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In Search of Tolerance Part 4: How Empathy Transforms Relationships

In Search of Tolerance Part 4: How Empathy Transforms Relationships | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

Anytime we come together as humans our differing viewpoints, tendencies, and belief systems can sometime collide. Conflict in relationships is inevitable and can become a moment for growth,


as Carl Jung says,

“The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.”



In this post, we’re looking at how empathy can transform relationships. 


Empathy Reduces Conflict...

Deep Listening Shows You Care...

Empathy Heals and Uplifts Others...

Empathy Leads To Compassion..


BY DAVID BARNES 


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How to Share Your Feelings and Be Heard

How to Share Your Feelings and Be Heard | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
These 4 steps can help you express your feelings compassionately, which will increase the odds that your loved one will be able to really hear you.
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Does Nature Select for Nice?

Does Nature Select for Nice? | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

A new book argues that selflessness, not selfishness, creates more genetic success.

 

But according to physicist and science writer Stefan Klein’s new book, the idea that we are born to be selfish is dead wrong. In Survival of the Nicest: How Altruism Made Us Human and Why It Pays to Get AlongKlein argues that selflessness, not selfishness, creates more genetic success, and that proof for this has been gaining momentum among scientists, gradually challenging the “survival of the fittest” model in evolution.

 

======================

Selflessness, after all, has some

incredible benefits. With selflessness

comes compassion and empathy,

=========

 

Selflessness, after all, has some incredible benefits. With selflessness comes compassion and empathy, the combination of which lays the foundation for vital survival skills that were required by humans to colonize the world—skills, for example, like the ability to learn to follow common goals. By Joseph Ferrell |


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Daniel Goleman et la compassion

Daniel GOLEMAN, Auteur de L’intelligence émotionnelle, demande pourquoi nous ne faisons pas preuve de compassion plus souvent.
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Colorado high school replaces punishment with 'talking circles' - YouTube

At Hinkley High School in Aurora, Colo., students, parents and administration are meeting face-to-face to resolve student conflict with conversation. The num...
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Self-Compassion: How To Stop Being So Damn Hard On Yourself

Self-Compassion: How To Stop Being So Damn Hard On Yourself | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

You are your own worst critic. Self-compassion is the act of extending kind thoughts towards yourself. Learn how to live with more self-compassion today.

1. Start With The Basics

It’s very difficult to extend any compassion towards yourself if you aren’t letting yourself meet your most basic needs.

Get full nights of rest, eat clean and nutritious food, and get some form of exercise at least two or three times per week.

Living a sedentary lifestyle, with little rest, and a sugary, white flour based diet is the fastest way to burn out on a cellular level. Just because you have opposable thumbs and the ability to think rationally doesn’t mean that you aren’t an animal that has certain needs to maintain a baseline level of health.

 

Jordan


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David Hain's curator insight, February 5, 2014 2:09 AM

Visualising a positive future starts with valuing what you have to offer.

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True Empathy

True Empathy | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it
Our goal should be to not only help children take others' viewpoints but to value diverse perspectives and people. How do we expand children's circle of empathy and concern?

 

Empathy is at the heart of what it means to be human. It's not only a foundation for ethical functioning and professional success but for good relationships of many kinds and for loving well. Yet it's also vital to understand what true empathy is. There's far more to empathy than simply understanding another person's point of view. After all, con men and torturers are highly skilled at understanding others' perspectives -- so they can bore in on their victims' weaknesses. Siblings can have hawk-like skills at spotting and preying on each other's most shameful vulnerabilities and fears. Salespeople, politicians, actors and marketers are often very deft at taking other perspectives but they may not care any more about other people than the rest of us.

 

Richard Weissbourd

Lecturer, Harvard Graduate School of Education

 


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Integral Options Cafe: Science of Compassion 2013 — Neuroscience and Cognitive Perspectives on Compassion

Integral Options Cafe: Science of Compassion 2013 — Neuroscience and Cognitive Perspectives on Compassion | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

The purpose of the CCARE Summer Research Institute, co-sponsored by the Telluride Institute, a five-day conference to be held in Summer 2013, is to advance research on compassion and altruism through collaboration, dialog, inquiry, education, and research.

Drawing from several disciplines including neuroscience, psychology, genetics, economics, and contemplative traditions, the CCARE Summer Research Institute aims to examine compassion, altruism and prosocial behavior from a wide perspective of scientific angles. In particular, the institute will explore and discuss the neural correlates, biological bases and antecedents of compassion; the effects of compassion on behavior, physiology, overall health, and the brain; and methods, techniques, and programs for cultivating compassion and promoting altruism within individuals and society-wide. Compassion education programs will also be integrated into the curriculum.


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7 myths about empathy - Doug Johnson

7 myths about empathy - Doug Johnson | Authentic Dialogue | Scoop.it

Not just logic, but also EMPATHY. “What will distinguish those who thrive will be their ability to understand what makes their fellow woman or man tick, to forge relationships, and to care for others. Daniel Pink, A Whole New Mind

 

"I'm not quite sure why I did it, but I volunteered to speak about empathy at the Global Education Conferencecoming up in a couple weeks. So I spent some time this weekend trying to learn a little more about the topic.I've been interested in empathy as a possibly teachable/developable skill since reading Pink's A Whole New Mind book some years ago and thinking about how reading builds empathetic understandings.

 

What surprised me in my research, however, was not learning what empathy is - but what it is not. In trying to synthesize some things, here are a few "myths of empathy": "


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